


How To Save a Life

by Delphines_puppy



Category: Orphan Black (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Fluff, I have good intentions I swear, Intense, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-05
Updated: 2016-11-10
Packaged: 2018-08-19 16:59:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 19
Words: 41,268
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8217992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Delphines_puppy/pseuds/Delphines_puppy
Summary: Delphine moves away from her life in Paris to work at the world-renowned DYAD institute in Toronto. Delphine should be thrilled, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity. Yet she can't help but fear the unknown, she is terrified, she was at least until she met her co-worker, Dr. Cosima Niehaus.Dr.Niehaus is troubled and in need of love, from the moment they meet, Delphine promises herself and her colleague, all be it unknown to Cosima, that she will fix whatever is causing her to break, and as the two grow closer and Delphine discovers the truth, she learns that some things, some people... Cosima is worth risking everything for.---------------------I want to dedicate this work to Zosia (DrCormier)!





	1. Glad You Came

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone, first of all, thank you for taking a minute to check out this labour of love, it means a lot. Secondly, this is my first attempt at writing well, anything really, so please be gentle.
> 
> I appreciate any comments any of you want to leave, I promise I'll reply!
> 
> 16.05.17 UPDATE: P.S. It is intense AF to the point where it's kind of unrealistic (yes I am aware), but I wrote this ages ago when I was still new to writing and also its Cophine so you know hopefully that makes it acceptable.
> 
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ggzxInyzVE

_‘Calling all passengers boarding flight 324/B21, Paris to Toronto’_

As she boarded her flight, Delphine Cormier nervously began to contemplate different scenarios in her head. She imagined that she would arrive in Toronto, she would begin her new job at the world-renowned DYAD institute, she would be alone and inevitably scared for the challenges she would surely face. She had imagined meeting new colleagues and having the chance to work with Dr. Aldous Leekie, the head of DYAD, a chance that millions of graduates could only dream of, so of course, she should be thrilled, she should be, but of course Delphine never allowed herself to indulge in the prospect of being completely happy, she was a very guarded person. This was a once in a lifetime opportunity; and yet a whisper in the back of her mind screamed for her to run away; to run home to her maman and papa in Paris, back to her very few friends and familiar surroundings and finally to her now very ex-boyfriend. 

The long flight only heightened her fears, relentless finger tapping, and an accelerated heartbeat plagued her the entire flight. Landing in Toronto was more than welcome, despite her reservations, finally being on solid, unfamiliar ground was a blessing in disguise. 

After collecting her baggage and finding her way to the nearest exit, she waited outside the airport for her chauffeur, which despite her protest, Dr. Leekie instead on. She stood for a moment, completely still, simply taking the opportunity to breathe in fresh air, she looked up at the sun beaming down on her feeling the unseasonal warmth kiss her pale skin. She looked around her new surroundings and it was as though time stood still, she saw families getting ready to depart on their family vacation, young adults kissing their parents goodbye as they prepared to travel the world and finally she saw an elderly couple holding hands waiting for their children to return home, this particular couple stirred up emotions in Delphine that she had spent so long repressing. She ached for a love like that, psychically, mentally and emotionally, above all else she ached for a family and to grow old with someone she truly loved, but Delphine had always put her career first, never allowing herself to get too close to anyone, it is why she had always driven away any good man she had ever been with, she was destined to be alone and that was a future she had slowly come to terms with.  As a single tear rolled down her now not so warm cheek, she heard a muffled voice calling her.

“Dr. Cormier I pressure?” a young man offered.

“Oui _(yes)_ , yes hello, it’s Delphine please.” Delphine extended a hand to greet her driver. He was handsome. Extremely handsome in fact, he was tall and very muscular, well built with dark brown hair and beautiful eyes to match, wearing what looked like an extremely expensive tailored suit. As he reciprocated Delphine’s gesture, she couldn't help but notice his warm smile which made her blush uncontrollably, which both herself and this charming man in front of her was all too aware of. 

“Delphine, its a pleasure to meet you, I hope I didn't keep you waiting, I'm Paul, Paul Dierden.” 

“Non, of course not, please, I just landed, I was going to get a cab but-“

“But Dr. Leekie insisted. I know, it's my pleasure, we take care of our workers at DYAD” Paul interrupted. 

With that, Paul gestured towards Delphine’s bags as he gently placed them in the trunk of the car and opened the door for Delphine to enter. Delphine felt slightly more at ease if nothing else she knew that she had at least one acquaintance in this new place. They began to drive away as Delphine stared out of the window, drinking in a whole new way of life. New people and places, even the seemingly unimportant things, like the architecture of the buildings and the green landscape felt so different, so alien to her. 

“So, how was your flight? I expect you must be tired.” Paul offered Delphine with a warm smile.

“Non, the flight was okay” She lied, “I was just excited to land and get started.”

“Well you’ll have to wait until tomorrow to get to work I’m afraid, today is strictly planned to get you settled in and debriefed on your future projects.” 

“Oh.” Delphine couldn't help but feel disappointed, she needed a distraction to stop her mind over thinking the large life decisions she had made rather hastily over the past few weeks. 

“Don't worry, I’ll take you to your new house now and I will leave you to get settled in. Later Cosima will drop by to get you caught up on all the work you have missed.” 

“Co-si-ma. Who is that?” Delphine asked genuinely interested.

“Sorry! I meant to say Dr. Niehuas. Please do not tell Dr. Leekie that I introduced her by her first name, he would most defiantly have me fired, he is very particular about… formality. Dr. Cosima Niehuas will be your new boss. She will be leading the team that you're going to be on. Don’t worry she is amazing, very intelligent and friendly, I’m sure you two will get on perfectly.” Paul said with a tone to his voice that Delphine couldn't quite recognise. It was a mixture between humour and sarcasm. Delphine put this down to their different languages and cultures and decided it must have been a Canadian thing.

The rest of the car journey was spent in a relatively comfortable silence with the pair exchanging small talk about the weather and what activities there were to do in Toronto, not that Delphine was interested in doing anything other than working.

When Paul pulled into a rather large complex Delphine was certain that he had taken a wrong turn. They had turned onto a large cul-de-sac, immaculate with double black iron gates and a security office at the entrance to police both visitors and residents. Once on the complex Delphine was even more stunned by the large houses one after another that occupied the area. The houses were immaculate, large typically modern, suburban houses each with a mailbox and porch out front, how homely Delphine thought. 

“Are these houses all occupied by workers?” Delphine asked. How could they be? These houses were larger and more beautiful than any houses she had ever seen occupied in Paris, even by the rich. 

“Yes, the DYAD institute is only a 15-minute walk from here. Dr. Leekie likes to ensure all of his most valuable workers are close by in case of an emergency. All of the other workers live relatively close by but they have their own places”

“So why am I staying here, surely these houses are for the CEO’s and head of departments, non?”

“Don’t underestimate your importance Dr. Cor- Delphine.” There it was again, that smile that instantly made Delphine feel at ease. “The complex houses 50 of DYAD’s most well respected and most important workers. The only person I suspect you’ll ever get to meet here is Dr. Niehaus.”

“Oh, he lives here too. Well, I’m glad I'll know at least one of my neighbours” Delphine said sarcastically.

“Yes, SHE does. She’ll be living right opposite your house in fact. You're both at the end of the cul-de-sac, just before the last house.”

“Merde _(shit)_ ”, Delphine muttered to herself embarrassed. “Sorry I don't know why I assumed that she was male, I’m not usually one to jump to such conclusions.”

“It's okay if I hadn't known your first name, I probably would have done the same to you.”

As Paul said that he pulled up outside one of the breathtaking houses. Delphine noticed the mailbox had already been marked ‘CORMIER’. “I'm guessing this is mine”. Delphine gestured towards the house holding her breath. 

“Yep and that is Dr. Niehaus’ house right there.” Paul gestured towards a house that was indeed dead opposite her house, it must have been no more that 50 feet away. And yet, it was different to any other house on the complex. It was decorated with vibrant coloured plants and neon porch furniture, so unlike all of the other houses which displayed identical metal, monochrome furniture and no flowers at all.  Delphine couldn't help but smile to herself as she thought about the obvious brazen sign of rebellion that was being displayed by her colleague. 

Paul walked up the driveway and opened Delphine’s door placing her bags in the bright, wide and welcoming hallway.  “Okay, that's my duties done for the day. I’ve left my number and the number of a really good local take out of the counter for you. Dr. Niehaus is probably still at the lab, she has been instructed to be here at 8PM sharp, which means she’ll probably be here at 8:45PM. If you need anything, anything at all, just call me, okay?” Paul said placing a supporting hand on Delphine’s shoulder as he made his way out to leave.

“Oui, merci _(Yes, thank you)_ Paul, thank you so much for all of your help today.” Delphine smiled.

“My pleasure, I’ll see you tomorrow, I’ll be here at 7AM to pick you up.” Despite Delphine’s protests, Paul instead and she begrudgingly agreed. 

The next few hours were spent unpacking and admiring her new house. There was no doubt that it was beautiful, but it was also very sterile and minimalist, she noted to herself to go to the store and pick up some things to make it feel more like a home as opposed to just another house on the complex. This was most definitely a lifestyle that Delphine wasn't accustomed to, she had always lived a modest lifestyle in Paris. She was one of 3 siblings and her parents had always done their best to support her through her studies despite their lack of financial stability. They worked tirelessly and often went without just so she and her siblings would have the best chances in life. Delphine knew that she would do whatever it took to repay her debt to her parents, she would make them proud no matter the cost. 

Later, Delphine was making herself coffee, impatiently waiting for Dr. Niehaus to arrive. It was well past 8PM, even past 8:45PM, it was approaching 9:15PM when Delphine heard a rather loud knock at the door which made her jump and spill her coffee all over her new blouse. “Merde, merde, merde, pourquoi est-ce genre de chose arrive toujours à moi? _(shit, shit, shit, why is this kind of thing always happens to me?)_ ” Delphine whispered as she grabbed a hand towel and began nervously patting her shirt as she opened the door. 

“Bon-jor” Cosima beamed, wearing her most innocent and sincere smile.

“Hello, Dr. Niehaus I presume,” Delphine said still patting her shirt. Then, she looked up and saw Cosima, she was beautiful. Small, adorably so, with glistening eyes, brunette dreads and perfect, timeless features.

“No Dr. Niehaus is my mom, my dad, my grandma, and grandpa, pretty much my entire family really, they're all doctors or scientists or whatever. I am Cosima, it is really cool to finally meet you Dr. Cor-mier” Cosima extended a hand to greet Delphine. Delphine gladly accepted the welcoming gesture and couldn't help but chuckle to herself hearing Cosima’s awful attempt at a French accent.

Delphine invited Cosima in and invited her to sit at the island in the kitchen.  “It’s Delphine, please. And I’m sorry about my appearance I spilt my coffee just before you arrived. Can I get you a drink?” Delphine admitted, neglecting to inform Cosima that it was indeed her fault. 

“Are you kidding me? No, it's totally fine, I’m so clumsy, like SO clumsy, I do that kind of thing all the time. I’m also always late, so kind of always sorry. I’ll take a coffee black if you wouldn't mind” Cosima countered smiling. Delphine smiled to herself at the thought of Cosima lying to try and comfort her, unless she really was clumsy, in which case she wasn't sure that she should be working in a lab with such delicate materials. 

“Oui bien sur _(yes, of course)_ , I have coffee”.  Delphine poured Cosima her coffee, as she turned around to hand it to her new colleague she was met with a wide smile and eyes glistening at her. “Quelle? _(what?)_ , is there something wrong?” Delphine asked as she handed Cosima her coffee. 

“No, no, no, it's just that… well… um.” Cosima struggled to find the right words.

“It’s okay Cosima. I’m what? You can say it…” Delphine asked worried, with a raised eyebrow.  

“You really are French!” Cosima squealed excitedly.

Delphine couldn't contain her laughter, this time, she laughed out loud for the first time in months. “Oui, yes Cosima I am French. I have a French accent and I am from France. What ever could have given me away!?” 

“Well, it would have to be that ridiculously, amazingly, perfect accent of yours Delphine! Like, my God! Everything you say sounds like music. Even my name sounds pretty great in French. Co-si-ma, CO-si-Ma, co-SI-ma.” Cosima attempted in a French accent, only causing Delphine to laugh even louder, which in turn made Cosima laugh uncontrollably as well. 

“Oui, il fait beau son _(yes, it's nice)_. Although your pronunciation is terrible. On behalf of the entire French-speaking population, I am offended.” Delphine managed to say through the laughter. 

Still laughing Cosima adds, “Ju- swee - desole Madame Cormier. You have my sincerest apologies, it looks like you're going to have to become my new French teacher”.

Wiping a tear of laughter away from her eye Delphine counters, “Is that right Miss Niehaus? I’m not sure that whatever language you just attempted is able to be fixed. I mean wow! I’ve heard some pretty bad French accents in my time but that was by far the worst”.

“Hon, hon, baguettes, La Eiffel Tower,” Cosima adds, her voice croaky from all the laughter. “See I’m half way there, I’ve basically done your job for you.”

"Hey! nous ne disons pas que, ou le son comme ça! _(we do not say that, or sound like that!)_.” Delphine swatted Cosima’s arm, struggling to find a time in her life over the last few month when she had felt so happy. “But, oui, I guess I could give you a few lessons in between working.” Delphine smiled.

“I'm so glad you’re here! Like don't get me wrong your CV is like super impressive and you're toats over qualified to be here, but it’s nice to have another woman on the team. Especially when that woman can bring an element of class and sophistication to the group; the guys on our team are going to go crazy for you. Just promise me you’ll let them down gently. They don't often get a lot of female attention outside of the lab, you’re going to break their little nerdy, golden hearts” Cosima pleaded with a cheeky wink.

Delphine’s laughter died down as she blushed again, was Cosima flirting with her? This was not something Delphine was used to, not where another woman was concerned. Sure, Delphine was used to getting attention from men, she was beautiful and she knew it. Her curly blonde locks, lithe figure and long legs were always irresistible to the male population, especially when she played up to their fantasies by emphasising her French accent, even though that wasn't what she sounded like in reality. But she had never been so affected by a woman complementing her before, it was definitely a day of firsts for Delphine. 

“Merci _(thank you)_ , it is nice to be on a team such as yours. I’ve heard only impressive things from Dr. Leekie about you and your work, he seems to be a big fan of yours.” Delphine smiled tried to return the compliment.

Suddenly Cosima shifted in her seat, an expression fell on her face, one of hurt and … fear or anger? Delphine was ashamed to admit that she knew this look all too well, it had become a common expression of hers over the last view weeks, it was a large reason that she had chosen to leave Paris. She forced herself to snap out of it, she was not going to cry in front of Cosima. But before she had a chance to change to subject, Cosima had beaten her to it. 

“Um… yeah, well you'll begin at 7:30AM tomorrow and finish at 6PM. I’ll fill you in on the details tomorrow morning while the others are having their morning meetings. I’ll see you tomorrow Dr. Cormier”.

Before Delphine had a chance to respond Cosima was heading towards the door and closed it behind her. Delphine followed Cosima into her hallway, she stood there, feeling the same way she had boarding the plane. Alone. She couldn't understand what had just happened. She thought that she and Cosima had really connected. Delphine finally thought that she had found a friend.  What was worse was the feeling that she had somehow insulted or even worse hurt Cosima. 

Delphine decided to head up to bed. She wasn't tired if anything she was wide awake. She knew a restless night awaited her, she never slept well and she knew for a fact that she wouldn't tonight. Not with the events from earlier playing on her mind so relentlessly. 

Delphine moved her armchair over to the window and planted herself there. She sat quietly watching the hours on the clock pass by painfully slow. She curled up with a blanket looking out at the window to see nothing but stillness. She was lost in thoughts of her family, of her ex-boyfriend and of her few friends. Delphine had always found it hard to open up to people, so instead she never let herself get into a position where she would need to; she only dated men for sex and only went out with friends when she needed a distraction, it was easy and for the most part, no one got hurt.

She was brought back to reality when she saw a light flicker on across the street. Upon closer inspection, she saw it was Cosima’s house. She watched as a silhouette from inside one of Cosima's rooms paced around restlessly. Delphine knew it was Cosima, she could tell by her petite frame. She wanted to go over and apologise. Even though she had only just met her she could relate to Cosima, she could identify with how she was feeling. Delphine felt an overwhelming need to protect her new colleague, and hopefully, her new friend.  Delphine was determined to get to the bottom of whatever was bothering her. She made a promise to herself and to Cosima, despite Cosima being none the wiser, that she would try to fix whatever was causing her such distress with the hope that this too would heal some of her own wounds. She promised that she would help this clearly vulnerable bundle of joy, no matter the cost. Making a promise such as this one was not something that Delphine entered into lightly. 

With that she allowed herself to drift off into a gentle sleep with thoughts of tomorrow clouding her dreams.


	2. Wicked Games

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all of your comments and kudos so far!
> 
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1OTWCd40bc (explicit)

Cosima awoke the next morning after only an hour of solid sleep. She was restless and overthinking the previous night's events. She knew that she shouldn't have acted the way she did, Delphine didn't deserve that, but her actions were involuntary, it was almost like a chemical reaction had sent her body into survival mode and she felt an overwhelming need to fly as opposed to fight. 

 

Cosima was determined to apologise for the way she behaved, she just hoped that Delphine could forgive her and that she had not ruined a promising new friendship. Cosima knew that no matter how close she wanted to get to Delphine, no matter how long she spent thinking about her or wanting to talk to her, she couldn’t, she couldn't involve her in this. 

 

But Cosima had been alone for so long. No family close by, no friends other than Scott, no lover or even a booty call to share her bed with. On nights when Cosima felt alone she would look at Delphine’s file that had been sent to her by Leekie pending her arrival and envision what she would be like. Cosima had fantasised about befriending her and sharing her work and eventually her friendship with the French woman, but meeting her in real life was more perfect than the brunette could ever have imagined; she felt an instant connection with Delphine, the type that you only ever hear about in love songs and romance films but she knew of course that Delphine was probably… no, most definitely straight and that she would never reciprocate Cosima’s feelings so she never let her mind wonder beyond a possible friendship. 

 

Cosima showered quickly and dressed in her usual casual style, black cargo pants and a loose fitted burgundy tank top with her brunettes dreads up in a high bun. She quickly grabbed a cup of coffee before it was time to make her way to work. The walk seemed to be never ending, despite the fact it only took 15 minutes or so, Cosima kept practising what she was going to say to Delphine, how she was going to explain her behaviour, without telling her the truth. 

 

Cosima arrived at work, late, she was logging into her office computer when she heard someone knock on her door. _Please be Delphine, please be Delphine, please be Delphine_ she thought to herself.

 

“Come in.” She shouted in her usual excited voice. 

 

Delphine opens the door slightly poking her head in the door. “Hi, I… Paul said that you wanted to see me?” Delphine looked nervous and it made Cosima feel unbelievably guilty.

 

“Yeah of course! Come in, come in, take a seat.” Cosima gestured towards her leather sofa and joined Delphine there. 

 

“I-“

 

“Listen, abo-“

 

Both women began at the same time. They chuckled, in a strange way they were both relieved that the other wanted to discuss the previous night's events. 

 

“Please let me go first.” Cosima pleaded with an embarrassed look draped across her usually beaming expression. “I’m so, so, so sorry about last night. I mean for you know leaving when I did and practically running out of your house. I was just really tired and felt ill and that's no excuse but you know…”

 

“Oh no please, I was going to apologise! I didn't mean to pry-“ Delphine countered.

 

“No! You didn't Delphine. Honestly, I barely slept thinking about how shitty I acted last night.” Not that this was news to Delphine, she had stayed up half the night watching Cosima pace around her room. “You didn't do anything wrong! It’s just that… well… um…like I said I was tired and suddenly felt sick, I didn't mean to take that out on you. So, are we cool?”

 

“Oui _(yes)_ , of course, Cosima, we are indeed very cool,” Delphine said relieved, finding herself smiling.

 

“Great!.” Cosima's grin had been restored to its former glory. “Let's get you all caught up then.”

 

The next hour or so was spent going through the details of Cosima’s project, it was a study looking at the effects of an auto-immune disorder and trying to cure or more realistically treat it. Hearing Delphine’s genuine enthusiasm for the subject was so refreshing to Cosima, she couldn't help but gape at Delphine as she watched her use incredibly cute hand gestures and facial expressions to accompany her excitement. Cosima knew she was staring and she also knew that Delphine was aware of her fixed gaze upon her, but she didn't care she couldn't pull her eyes away from the now very animated blonde. 

 

Cosima snapped back to reality after realising that Delphine was no longer talking, “Great, I think that's you all up to date, shall we go meet the guys?” Cosima asked moving towards the door.

 

“You mean the ‘guys’ who's hearts I'm going to break? Are you sure you’re ready to expose them to my clearly irresistible French allure?” Delphine chuckled nudging Cosima’s arm with her own. 

 

Cosima’s heart stopped. Even if the guys wouldn't be affected by Delphine's ‘French allure’, as she so eloquently put it, she certainly had been. She led Delphine towards the direction of the labs.

 

“Hm well better to do it quick right? Like ripping off an old, dirty band-aid?” Cosima countered, her tongue between her teeth.

 

Delphine stopped dead in her tracks. “Cosima… did you just compare to an old, dirty band-aid?” Delphine faked an upset expression.

 

Cosima pulled Delphine’s arm to continue the journey, “NO! God no! I just mean… you know that… like you're definitely not… you're perfect!” Cosima said without thinking. _Shit._

 

“Oh is that so? You think I'm perfect?” Delphine said with a cheeky grin.

 

“No… I mean yes-“ Cosima was an intelligent woman and yet she fumbled over her words.

 

“Relax Cosima I’m only joking, let's meet these… nerds with golden hearts I believe you called them.”

 

Cosima pushed open the lab door to see her team standing around a table, no doubt playing a new board game Scott had discovered. 

 

Cosima cleared her throat, “Guys, this is Delphine, she's a very over qualified, very French Immunology graduate, she's going to be our newest team member.”

 

Cosima chuckled to herself as she watched Scott, Randy and Peter stutter and fumble over their words. Delphine looked to Cosima and offered her a cheeky wink which Cosima swore would have made her knees buckle had she not been leaning against a table. 

 

“Bonjour, nice to meet you all.” Delphine smiled, knowing all too well the effect she was having on them, yet her eyes were glued to Cosima’s indulging in the sweet inside joke that only her and Cosima shared.

 

Cosima introduced Delphine to the boys one by one, they were still baffled despite their best efforts to act cool in front of the blonde. 

 

The rest of the day passed with ease. Delphine was shown the teams work by Scott and discussed the results with Peter and Randy. The group had lunch together, sharing life experiences and jokes that only scientists would find funny. She found herself slot into this team perfectly, they all made her feel so welcome, she felt as though she had finally found her place, she finally felt as though she had made her parents proud, the work she would do here would be important and it would eventually save people's lives, her and her new friends would be world famous scientists with pioneering new research. 

 

She had spent the majority of the afternoon sitting side by side with Cosima talking about their degrees and their work, about co-worker gossip and each others favourite films and books; Delphine had laughed and smiled so hard that afternoon that she swore her jaw was locked fixed in its new position, and she didn't care one bit. How was this possible? How could she feel so comfortable with a woman she had only just met? It was ludicrous, Delphine hadn't even felt this close to her friends back in Paris, but Cosima had a comforting easiness to her that made a typically wound up Delphine relax a little bit more each time they exchanged glances with one another.

 

When she looked at the clock, she was disappointed to find that it was already 6PM and time to go home. 

 

After the boys had left, Cosima and Delphine were packing up their bags when Cosima turned to her friend with her tongue behind her teeth. “So… how was your first day being on such an amazing and talented team? Was your boss nice to you? I heard she can be a real bitch.”

 

Delphine chuckled, “Well, Cosima…” Delphine’s voice became more serious, “… it was incredible. I mean truly, I don’t want you to think of me as a workaholic, but today has genuinely been the best day of my life. Thank you for letting me be a part of it and a part of your team.” Delphine tried her best to hold back her tears, to offer a witty and sarcastic comeback, but she was unsuccessful and the tears began. 

 

“Hey, hey what's wrong? It’s okay… you can tell me.” Cosima spoke softly pulling Delphine into a tight embrace.

 

In that moment Delphine felt all of her anxiety melt away. She allowed Cosima to wrap her arms around her neck and pull her closer whilst her hands remained tight around Cosima’s mid-back. They squeezed each other firmly, clearly this was an embrace both women needed. Delphine just stood there allowing her soft sobs to fall on the brunette's shoulder as Cosima tried her hardest to comfort her.

 

Delphine pulled back slightly, still hugging Cosima and staring into her inviting eyes, “It’s just that… I’ve never felt so happy. I never really had anyone… friends or lovers… that made we feel so wanted, and now it finally feels like everything is falling into place, like moving here away from everything I knew was worth it. You and the guys, you've been so kind and I know it’s stupid-“

 

“No Delphine it’s not. It’s not. I get it, believe me, I know what it's like to finally have something good in your life.” Cosima allowed a single tear fall down her cheek, she held her breath as Delphine wiped it away with her thumb.

 

“Talk to me Cosima, please,” Delphine said with a sad chuckle.

 

With that, Cosima slipped out of their embrace. 

 

“I'm sorry Delphine. I want to be there for you. I want you as a friend more than you could ever imagine. But it’s complicated.”

 

“Why? Clearly, we both need someone to talk to. Why can’t we be that to each other?” Delphine pleaded.

 

“Trust me, Delphine, you don't want a friend like me.” Cosima couldn't contain her tears anymore, she allowed them to flow freely onto her shirt. 

 

“Don’t say that Cosima!” Delphine yelled ushering in the brunette's direction.

 

“It's true…” Cosima said backing away towards the door. “…I need to go, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

 

“Please Cosima, don't leave me like this, I opened up to you, stay here with me. We don’t have to talk just stay.” Delphine said trying to fight back the tears.

 

With that, Cosima ran out of the lab. Delphine was left standing in a cold, sterile lab alone. Feeling beyond vulnerable, she felt exposed completely. Maybe she had pushed too hard. Delphine sobbed once again, she felt her knees buckle as she sat on the floor bringing her knees to her chest. This was why she remained alone, she had never experienced a feeling like this, completely rejected and unwanted. She was startled by the sound of her phone, she looked at it immediately expecting it to be Cosima, it was Paul, he was waiting for her downstairs. Delphine made her way to the car, feeling numb, the journey home was short and silent. Delphine appreciated that Paul understood that she needed space. 

 

Delphine arrived home and threw herself on her couch allowing herself to continue crying. Hours had passed and Delphine had not moved since she arrived home, instead, she stayed in the same position completely still, she was broken. To any other person, this wouldn't be so much of an issues, they would get over it, to any ‘normal’ person the idea of telling someone how you feel is not something that makes you want to hide away and cry, but Delphine had never opened up to anyone before about well… anything, not her parents, her lovers, not even her supposed best friend, Cosima was her first.

 

She listened to the thunderstorm outside, it was heavy and loud, a welcome distraction from her thoughts, she almost mistook the quiet knock at the door for thunder.

 

Delphine slowly lifted herself from the couch and walked towards the door. Her eyes were bloodshot, her make-up smudged, she knew she was a mess but she also knew that it would be Cosima at the door. Delphine wanted her to see the hurt and pain she had caused her, she wanted Cosima to feel guilty and to hug her again and tell her that everything would be okay. 

 

Delphine approached the door and opened it wide in one swift motion. 

 

“Dr. Cormier, it’s nice to finally meet you. I was hoping we could have a quick chat if that is okay?” A male voice inquired. 

 

“Dr. Leekie! I… yes please come in.” Delphine gestured to him to enter her home, rubbing under her eyes and flattening her hair. It was late but she welcomed the distraction.  

 

As she was closing the door she saw Cosima, she was crying, previously shielded behind Dr. Leekies tall frame. Cosima was standing in Delphine’s driveway frozen, only feet away from each other.

 

Delphine knew Cosima detested Dr. Leekie it was obvious. She knew that the thought of Delphine alone with him, especially when she was so vulnerable, would anger, even hurt Cosima. 

 

Delphine was all too aware of Dr. Leekie’s reputation as a man of pleasure, he was known for relentlessly pursuing the younger women of DYAD and more often than not he got what he wanted from them; it was a well-known fact within the company and so long as he was discreet everyone turned a blind eye.

 

She made a point to look at Cosima dead in the eye, her eyes still red and swollen, feeling the same numbness she felt earlier. She simply broke her gaze with Cosima, a despairing expression now displayed on her face and retreated into her house closing the door behind her where Dr. Leekie awaited her. 

 

Delphine had left Cosima standing in her driveway alone. This was no different to how she had felt  only hours earlier at the hands of her so called friend. She did not feel guilty about abandoning Cosima, she would not allow herself to feel empathy for a woman who had taken her trust and thrown it back in her face. 

 

Delphine swore she wouldn't let this happen again, she wouldn't let herself open up to anyone again. She would return to her usual ideology, friends are for distractions and men are for pleasure. Since she didn't have any friends close by she figured she would have to use the latter as both a distraction and pleasure instead. After all, Delphine did have a man in her house, one who she knew would be more than willing to pleasure her…

 


	3. Beautiful Lies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for the kudos and comments they honestly mean the world to me!
> 
> M- Some mature language and content.
> 
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=guNu0chjVgo

The following morning Delphine lay upon the bed, staring at the ceiling. She was overwhelmed with anger, continuously recounting the previous day's events, waiting for her 6:15AM alarm to sound. She hadn't slept, between bursts of tears and frustration she couldn't allow herself to relax. 

 

Dr. Leekie had only stayed in Delphine's home for an hour or so. He introduced himself, formally, and explained his expectations of what Delphine's work should accomplish. Despite Delphine’s intentions of sleeping with her boss, she couldn't follow through. She knew that having sex with Dr. Leekie would be overstepping a line with Cosima that she could never return from.

 

However, Dr. Leekie relentlessly flirted with the blonde, even going so far as to caress her knee and stroke her thigh but Delphine put a stop to all advances stating that she was simply tired until he finally understood her message and left. 

 

She was glad when he eventually left, she was finally able to breathe easy until she remembered her argument with Cosima and then she began crying again. She wondered if Cosima was watching her house to see if Dr. Leekie had left, or stayed the night. She would happily let Cosima believe that it was the latter, she would make a point of being evasive if Cosima questioned her, she wanted her to believe she had slept with him, that she willingly gave herself sexually the man that Cosima hated, she knew it would have broken the brunette. She wanted to go over and talk to her, desperately, but she thought better of it.

 

When her alarm finally rang, Delphine followed her usual morning routine. Shower, dress, breakfast. She arrived at work and headed straight for the lab where Scott, Randy and Peter awaited her with warm smiles. Delphine spoke with the guys for a while, asking them about their education and their hobbies trying her best to make small talk whilst she waited for Cosima. 

 

Scotts phone rang as he excused himself to answer it, still within Delphine's earshot.

 

“Hey, where are you?… What do you mean, why?… No, if you're not going to show up you could at least have the decency to be honest with me, tell me why…” Delphine had never seen Scott lose his temper. She thought he was the type who just didn't have it in him, she was wrong. 

 

Scotts face fell to the floor, he looked concerned, he looked up at Delphine and caught her eye. Scott whispered, “I will don't worry, I’ll make sure she's okay.”

 

 _Was that about me?_ Delphine knew it was. She could tell by the way Scott tried to whisper it, the way he began to squirm when Delphine met his gaze.

 

Scott returned to the team. “Cosima’s taking a sick day today, she's unwell, we have to analyse the samples and prepare the new batch.”

 

“Is she okay?” Delphine asked. She knew that a) Cosima was lying and that b) Scott was covering up something, he knew what was really wrong with her. 

 

“Yeah don't worry Delphine, I’m sure she’ll be fine. Would you mind if we spoke in private for a sec?” 

 

“Oui of course”

 

Delphine followed Scott into the hallway. 

 

“Delphine… Cosima she…. she said that Dr. Leekie came by your place last night for a meeting.”

 

“Is that a question or a statement Scott?” Delphine was clearly pissed off with this situation.

 

“A statement. Are you okay? I mean he can be intense, did… are you alright?” Scott asked clearly worried about his new friend.

 

“Yes Scott I am fine, actually I am better than fine, I’m feeling great”, Delphine made a point to flash Scott a sly grin, inferring her meeting with Dr. Leekie was anything but innocent.

 

“Oh okay, well I guess, lets get back to work then.”

 

Delphine didn't have the energy to fight with Scott, but she would get answers, straight from Cosima’s mouth. 

 

They both returned to the lab and started on their assigned tasks.

 

The hours past and still, Cosima had not come into work. Delphine had accepted that Cosima was not going to show up today, but that didn't mean that Delphine was going to let get away with what she did, for hurting her the previous night, for showing up on her driveway and for telling Scott about her meeting with Dr. Leekie. Delphine's hurt had turned into anger and she vowed that after work she would tell her new friend exactly how she felt.

 

6PM eventually arrived and Delphine left work in a hurry. It was yet another silent car journey in the  pouring rain. As soon as the car stopped outside her house, Delphine exited the car and marched over to Cosima’s house. Delphine banged on the front door and awaited a response, as soon as Cosima opened the door, with a new found confidence Delphine made her feelings very clear.

 

“WHERE WERE YOU TODAY?” Delphine yelled.

 

“What?” Cosima was uncharacteristically quiet.

 

“YOU HEARD ME COSIMA, WHY THE HELL DIDN’T YOU COME TO WORK.”

 

“I didn't feel well.”

 

“BULLSHIT. WHAT’S THE REAL REASON YOU DIDN’T SHOW UP? YOU COULDN’T FACE ME, IS THAT IT? WOW COSIMA, I DIDN’T THINK THAT YOU WERE A COWARD.”

 

Delphine turned around and started marching back towards her own house. She didn't care that there was yet again another thunderstorm and she was getting soaking wet, she couldn't stand to look at Cosima a second longer. Cosima ran after Delphine, she caught up with her in the middle of the road, grabbed her arm and swung her around to face her. 

 

“I AM NOT A COWARD DELPHINE!” Cosima was crying yet again. “I SPOKE TO SCOTT EARLIER, I CANT’ BELIEVE YOU’RE HERE LECTURING ME! HOW WAS HE DELPHINE? HUH?” Cosima matched Delphine’s scream.

 

“WHAT?!…YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW? HE WAS INCREDIBLE! HE FUCKED ME ALL NIGHT LONG AND MADE ME COME HARDER THAN I EVER HAVE BEFORE! IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR COSIMA?” Delphine knew she shouldn't drag Dr. Leekie into her problems but she needed ammo, and he was it.

 

“REALLY?!” Cosima’s voice croaked, there was nothing but sadness in her voice, “OKAY I’M DONE DELPHINE! I CANT BELIEVE YOU ACTUALLY- PART OF ME DIDN’T BELIEVE THAT YOU ACTUALLY COULD- I DIDN’T WANT TO THINK THAT YOU WOULD!” Cosima’s tears had not eased up. 

 

“WELL I DID COSIMA, HE WAS SO TENDER AND GIVING, HE WAS THE BEST LOVER I’VE EVER HAD!”

 

“BUT WHY HIM DELPHINE?”

 

“YOU LEFT ME! I WAS SCARED AND VULNERABLE, I WAS NUMB, I PLEADED WITH YOU TO STAY AND YOU LEFT ME! HE WAS JUST THERE! YOU DROVE HIM INTO MY BED, DO YOU KNOW THAT? IF YOU WOULD HAVE STAYED WITH ME THEN-” 

 

“-I WHAT?! DON’T BLAME ME FOR HOW EASY YOU ARE TO SCREW! AND DO YOU KNOW WHAT DELPHINE? I WAS SCARED TOO! I MEAN SUDDENLY HERE YOU ARE WITH YOUR BEAUTY AND INTELLIGENCE AND FUCKING FRENCHNESS. FUCK! IT’S SO EASY TO BE MYSELF WITH YOU! BUT I’VE ALREADY TOLD YOU WHATEVER THIS WAS OR COULD HAVE BEEN IT CAN’T-“

 

“JUST STOP! WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME COSIMA? BECAUSE ONE MINUTE YOU’RE FLIRTING WITH ME, TELLING ME IM BEAUTIFUL AND PERFECT AND THEN SUDDENLY WHEN WE START TO GET CLOSE YOU RUNAWAY!”

 

“YOU NEED TO TRUST ME DELPHINE! I’M NOT GOOD FOR YOU! THAT’S WHY I KEEP RUNNING AWAY! BECAUSE I LITERALLY FEEL AS THOUGH I’M GOING TO CRY EVER TIME YOU LOOK AT ME BECAUSE I KNOW THAT WE CANT BE-!”

 

Delphine grabbed Cosima’s neck, cupping her tear stained cheeks and pulled her forward kissing her, naturally Cosima’s hands grabbed Delphine’s waist and pulled her closer. 

 

The kiss was tender yet dense, no other kiss would ever compare to this. It felt so genuine that both women wondered how they had been without each other for so long. It made them feel completely vulnerable, yet completely willing to risk everything and hoping more than anything that the other wouldn't hurt them they way they so desperately feared. Delphine bit Cosima’s lower lip softly as she pulled away staring lovingly into Cosima’s eyes, their foreheads touching. 

 

“I didn’t sleep with Dr. Leekie Cosima… I couldn’t do that to you.” Delphine pleaded lovingly with the Brunette. “I was miserable before you, completely. And then I met you, this little geeky Canadian with the ability to make my cry with laughter and to feel like I belong, you're the only one who can comfort me and make me want to kill you at the same time.” Delphine laughed against Cosima’s lips. 

 

“You didn't sleep with him? But then why did you-“ Cosima returned the gaze.

 

“-I wanted a reaction. I wanted you to open up, to show me something real. I know it’s selfish but I needed to make you feel something and he just happened to show up at my door. I’m sorry, I never wanted to hurt you, well I mean I thought I did, but seeing you now, I never want to see you like this again Cosima. Je suis desole _(I am sorry)._ ”

 

“I’m sorry too, I never should have left you in the lab. I wanted to stay, I turned around so many times to make my way back to you but… I’m not easy to be with… I’m broken Delphine” Cosima looked down still wrapped up in her embrace with Delphine as the rain poured down mercilessly on them. 

 

Delphine placed a finger under Cosima's chin so that their eyes were once again locked on one another. “I know, it’s okay I am too… but I’m going to try, Cosima. No matter how much you push me away, I’m staying here, with you.”

 

Cosima laughed her heart feeling suddenly so full, she nuzzled herself into Delphine’s neck as Delphine kissed her cheek. 

 

“Are you sure? I mean it’s only been a few days? I’d understand if you wanted to run for the hills.”

 

“Do you want me to? Do you not want this, is that it?” Delphine asked softly.

 

“NO! Delphine I want you more than you can imagine. Before you got here, before I met you I read your file nearly every night for months before you joined DYAD. I conjured up this idea of who you would be in my head, you were this perfect being that I fantasised about meeting everyday until you arrived-.”

 

“-Merde _(shit),_ I’m sorry, I didn't want to disappoint you.” Delphine stated worried. 

 

“No, you could never! You're real Delphine. You're here with me and that is better than anything I could have ever fantasized about. So you see whilst its only been a few days for you, for me it’s been months of anticipation and excitement. I couldn't wait to meet you, you're more perfect than I could have ever imagined and I still can't believe that you're here now in my arms.” Cosima smiled as she placed her forehead against Delphine’s. 

 

Delphine smiled as she pulled Cosima into another kiss. “Well I am, I’m right here. I fell hard and fast for you Cosima, for me it was instant. When I saw you, I suddenly wasn't so afraid anymore.”

 

“Well good, because I fell hard and fast for you too.” she countered with her signature cheeky smile. “But I’m afraid that if we stay here any longer then we may get hypothermia and then I wouldn't be able to give you kisses like this…” 

 

Delphine pulled away from her kiss with Cosima. “Hm… that is a very good observation Dr. Niehaus, how about you come back to my place and we can have coffee and cuddles to warm up.”

 

Cosima raised an eyebrow at Delphine, “Just cuddles?! We probably have the most intense relationship ever, seriously, we’ve probably blown through the first 6 months of a normal relationship in a few days, and you just want cuddles?”

 

“Oui vous êtes si effronté _(Yes, you are so cheeky),_ we haven’t even had our first date yet mon cheri ( _my darling).”_

 

“Okay coffee and cuddles it is, but I’m planning on taking you out like for real, I’m going to do this right. Im going to do everything I can to give you the best first date ever, how’s tomorrow night?”

 

“Hmmm that sounds perfect” Delphine said grinning.

 

Delphine grabbed Cosima’s hand and led her back to her house. The couple spent the rest of the night curled up on the couch together in front of the fire with blankets and pillows both wearing Delphine’s comfiest pyjamas. They were talking about seemingly meaningless topics but just listening to each others voices was so soothing. Eventually they both fell asleep still cuddling with one another with Cosima resting her head on Delphine chest. Both women slept through until the morning, it was the best either women had slept in years. 

 


	4. Take My Heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always thank you for your comments and kudos, I couldn't continue without the support of you guys!
> 
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WHetRxAPo80

Delphine woke up to find that her little brunette was still fast asleep in her arms. She placed a gentle kiss on her cheek and pinched her hip playfully hard.

 

“OUCH! Delphine what was that for?” Cosima sat up startled into wakefulness. 

 

“Nothing, I just had to check that I wasn't dreaming,” Delphine said gleaming.

 

“DUDE!” Cosima laughed so hard she fell on her back, she couldn’t contain her snorting, “YOU'RE MEANT TO PINCH YOURSELF TO CHECK THAT YOUR AWAKE NOT INNOCENT VICTIMS NEARBY.”

 

Delphine sat up for a moment confused, then she realised her mistake and couldn't help but join in with Cosima’s helpless laughter. 

 

“Mon pauvre chiot” Delphine kissed Cosima’s now very inflamed hip.

 

“You’re the puppy.” Cosima pulled Delphine up by her cheeks to meet her lips and wrapped her small arms around her attackers neck.

 

“Mmmm does that mean I'm forgiven mon cheri?” Delphine asked with a playful smile.

 

“Well, that depends, what are you asking forgiveness for? For abandoning me in your driveway? For telling me you slept with fucking Voldemort? For verbally abusing me outside my house? OR…” Cosima took a long exaggerated breath, “…for pinching me?”

 

Delphine raised an eyebrow at the brunette, she was so bold and it was one of the qualities Delphine loved most about her. 

 

“Well… *Delphine cleared her throat* ….actually you abandoned me first, so we’re even. Secondly, I’m assuming that this Voldemort is one of your crazy references to Dr.Leekie, in which case I already said I was sorry. Thirdly, you gave as good as you got last night - you basically implied that I was a poule _(slut)_ \- WHICH…” Now it was Delphine’s turn to pause for dramatic effect, “…I let slide, but I can assure you I'm not. And finally yes I am asking for forgiveness for pinching you. I got confused, but you can’t be mad about that, look at me, look how cute I am.” Delphine batted her eyelids at the brunette.  

 

“God dammit how could I ever stay mad at you when you do that?” Cosima burrowed her head into Delphine’s neck, inhaling her unmistakable sweet scent. 

 

Delphine kissed Cosima’s forehead and worked her way down painfully slow to eventually meet Cosima’s lips where the pair passionately kissed. 

 

Cosima pulled back breathless after a few minutes of kissing the blonde, “hey there Frenchie, what about the whole _‘we haven't even had our first date yet mon cheri’_ thing?” Cosima joked, yet again mocking Delphine’s accent.

 

Delphine rolled over so her body was hovering above Cosima’s. “Is that really what I sound like to you? Do I sound that terrible?” Delphine pouted.

 

“Yes! Well… no, no I'm just playing, payback for you calling me a geeky Canadian.” Cosima teased with her signature smile.

 

“Hm I see, so you don't mind my ‘ _fucking_ _Frenchness’_ , as you so expertly put it.”

 

“Ha non, not at all, I wouldn’t trade it for anything,” Cosima whispered into a kiss.

 

Delphine deepened their kiss her body flush against Cosima’s, her elbows either side of Cosima’s head supporting her weight. Delphine ran her tongue along Cosima’s lower lip, Cosima was quick to grant her access, both women began exploring each other's mouths with a gentle eagerness. Delphine moved her thigh in between Cosima’s legs creating a welcomed friction for them both causing them to moan simultaneously.

 

“Wait, wait” Cosima panted breathlessly. 

 

“What? What's wrong?” Delphine continued to kiss the brunette's neck.

 

“It's midday on the day of our first date. And believe me as much as I want to stay here with you like I _really really really_ want to, you have no idea. I have to go and set things up, I told you I was going to give you the perfect first date and I intend to follow through.” 

 

“Non.” Delphine continued her exploration of Cosima’s neck and shoulders.

 

“Non? What are you going to hold me captive as your own personal sex slave?” Cosima couldn't contain her laughter.

 

“Oui, problem?” Delphine countered with one raised eyebrow and a shameless smile. 

 

Cosima laughed harder, “After tonight NO. By all means, I’ll happily be your prisoner but…” Cosima kissed the blonde, “… I want tonight to be perfect for you which means that I have to go now.” Cosima quickly and skilfully slid out from underneath Delphine’s hold with her tongue sticking out and gathered her clothes and bag together.  

 

Delphine stood up and removed her pyjama bottoms and top in the process. She moved towards the brunette, standing face to face with her in nothing but her sheer, black laced underwear. Cosima could swear that her heart could be seen pulsing through her chest. 

 

Delphine slowly slid Cosima’s hands up towards her body and placed one on her ass and the other on her breast, she wrapped her arms around the brunette's neck and gently sucked Cosima’s earlobe forcing Cosima to stifle a rather loud groan; Delphine simply whispered “Oui d’accord _(Yes okay)_ , see you later” into Cosima’s ear before pulling away. As she walked towards the hallway she could feel Cosima’s gaze watch her walk away, she opened the door for the brunette. 

 

Cosima couldn't move, she was stuck, half of her, the animalistic side, wanted to make love to Delphine right then and there and the other half, the more sensible part, forced her to walk to the door where she was met with Delphine’s cheeky smile. 

 

“I’ll pick you up at 8PM sharp okay? Wear something elegant” Cosima’s gaze never left Delphine’s lithe frame, she could still feel Delphine’s soft breast in her palm and her round ass in the other, despite the underwear covering Delphine’s features, Cosima had never been so aroused by something as simple as a touch before. 

 

“Oui Cosima, see you tonight,” Delphine replied. She loved the way Cosima looked at her, it made her feel so sexy and wanted. 

 

As Cosima walked out onto the porch she turned once more to face Delphine and despite her heart pounding unhealthily fast, she calmly said “Oh and Delphine…” 

 

“Oui.”

 

“…I’m going to make you pay for that later. Be prepared for a sleepless night.”

 

As Cosima walked away, Delphine closed the door and leaned against back of the cold frame with her lower lip between her teeth smiling. 

 

The next few hours pasted unbearably slow for Delphine, she tried to pass the time by reading, watching TV and exercising, but nothing could distract her from her thoughts of Cosima. 

 

It was 7PM and Delphine finally started to get ready. She wore her sexiest red laced underwear under a floor length flowing black dress with short sleeves and a low cut neck line. She finished her look with black heals and matching accessories. Delphine wanted to look her best for Cosima, she still maintained her natural look with her wild curls shaping her round face plus burgundy lipstick which made Delphine's lips look irresistible. 

 

At exactly 8PM Cosima knocked on her lover's door and Delphine felt her heart sink and her breath halt. She walked hastily to her door and opened it to reveal Cosima in a knee-length purple dress which clung to her curvaceous figure effortlessly. 

 

Delphine was speechless, “Cosima you… you look so beautiful.”

 

Cosima leaned in and planted a soft kiss on Delphine’s stunned lips. “Thank you, but you babe, you look like a masterpiece, you're just so perfect, how is it that I got so lucky?”

 

Delphine blushed, Cosima had called her babe and a masterpiece and perfect and felt lucky to have met her. _Wow._

 

“Non, Cosima it is I who is the lucky one” Delphine responded with another kiss pulling Cosima closer. 

 

Cosima slowly pulled away, “Mmmm okay then you're the lucky one” Cosima joked with a look of disbelief in her eyes.

 

Delphine swatted her arm and wrapped her hands around the brunettes waist. “So where are we going on this date that you ran out on me to prepare for?”

 

“Don’t worry I’ll make it up to you later I promise” Cosima kissed Delphine’s neck before intertwining their fingers and pulled her towards the cab that awaited them.

 

After a short cab drive uphill the women arrived at a little French bistro, Delphine defiantly knew it, it was famous worldwide and impossible to get a reservation for unless you were extremely rich or famous. Delphine thought Cosima had made a mistake.

 

“After you, my lady” Cosima gestured Delphine towards the restaurant.

 

“But… Cosima how did you?-” Delphine stuttered.

 

“-I called in some favors with some people, I told them that I really wanted to impress this girl that I was crazy about” Cosima blushed.

 

Delphine kissed Cosima’s cheek gently and allowed herself to be guided to the restaurant. 

 

After being seated at their table Delphine grabbed Cosima’s hand from across the table and simply and sincerely whispered “thank you.”

 

Cosima intertwined their fingers and simply nodded with a smile, nothing else was needed. 

 

When the waiter returned, Cosima winked at Delphine before proceeding to order the wine and a meal for the both of them in near perfect French, no help, no menu in front of her for reference, no poorly imitated French accent, the brunette even made pleasant small talk with their waiter… in French. 

 

Delphine was speechless.

 

“Something wrong babe?” Cosima asked with a smug smile on her face.

 

“I… I mean…when did you…-”

 

“-Learn French? This afternoon, I didn't want to embarrass you by speaking in a shitty French accent or stumbling over my words, so I looked up the menu and practiced the pronunciation all afternoon as well as making a few calls to set all of this up.”

 

Delphine was smiling, a tear in her eye was threatening to fall. “Cosima, that was so sweet of you, no one has ever… especially nothing so unbelievably considerate, but you could never embarrass me okay? Even with your appalling French accent” Delphine offered with a loving smile, “I choose to be here with you, despite your flaws I would never look at you any differently than I am right now. So don't ever feel as though you have to prove anything to me, just being you is more than enough” 

 

“Delphine. I-“

 

“-I know Cosima, me too.”

 

They exchanged a look of ease and comfort.

 

The food arrived and Delphine swore is was the best French food she had ever eaten, even better than the more upscale restaurants of Paris. 

 

The rest of the meal was full of hilarious childhood stories, of discussions around families and friends and common interests. The night had indeed been perfect, just as Cosima had promised, Delphine didn't want it to end.

 

Cosima paid for the meal, despite Delphine’s protests. The pair headed outside, as Delphine reached her arm out to hail a cab, Cosima grabbed her arm and pulled it around her neck.

 

“Dr. Cormier I know you don't think that we're done for the night?” Cosima asked gazing into Delphine’s eyes.

 

“You mean we’re not?” Delphine answered with a sly smile as she kissed the smaller woman in front of her.

 

Cosima pulled back softly, “Non mon cheri, we're just getting started.”

 

Cosima walked with Delphine for 5 minuted arms interlinked until they reached a food truck on top of a look out point. 

 

“Uh Cosima…”

 

“Wait right here okay”, Cosima encouraged Delphine to take a seat on a bench over looking the entire Toronto skyline, it was immaculate. Delphine had never seen a landscape so beautiful before, so inviting and breathtaking.

 

A moment later Cosima returned with an Eskimo pie for them each. 

 

“Here you go babe, eat it quick before it melts and I have to lick it off you.” Cosima winked.

 

Delphine smiled, “What is it? Ice cream?” Delphine took a bite. “Wow, this is good.”

 

“I'm glad you like it, it’s currently my favorite desert.”

 

“Currently?” Delphine asked confused.

 

“Well yeah… I mean I may have a new favorite after tonight.” Cosima blushed.

 

Delphine bought Cosima's hand to her lips and planted soft cold kisses along Cosima’s knuckles.

 

After they had both finished their ice cream Cosima bought her arms to wrap around Delphine’s stomach pulling her into a tight embrace and nuzzled her face into Delphine’s neck placing gentle kisses along the exposed area of skin. The pair watched the skyline for a while, it really was a spectacular sight, peaceful yet still so alive. 

 

“Cosima, tonight has been the best night of my life,” Delphine whispered. 

 

“You don't have to say that, I’m just glad that I finally got to take the most beautiful girl I’ve ever met out on a real date.”

 

Delphine pulled out of the embrace and tuned to face Cosima. She straddled the bench and pulled Cosima in so tightly she felt as though her and Cosima could melt together.

 

“I'm not just saying that Cosima”, Delphine placed Cosima’s hand on her heart and held it in place, “I mean it Cosima”, Delphine looked into Cosima’s eyes, “tonight has been the best night of my life”.

 

Cosima rested her head against Delphine’s, her hand still over her lover's heart, “me too Delphine, utterly and completely, thank you.”

 

Delphine placed quick kisses all over Cosima’s face and on each of her knuckles, “non, mon amour, thank you. I couldn't have asked for a better date than the one you’ve given me, I couldn't have asked to be here with anyone more perfect than you.”

 

“Delphine, I had other things planned for tonight but I… please just take me home,” Cosima asked breathing heavily.

 

Delphine smiled and nodded against the brunettes forehead. She pulled her up, her hands lovingly draped across her hips as she guided her into a cab.

 


	5. Talk Is Cheap

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the chapter I'm sure many of you were waiting for ;)
> 
> As always, thank you for the comments and kudos!
> 
> Chapter Song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aP_-P_BS6KY
> 
> WARNING: Sexual content.

As soon as the cab pulled up outside Delphine’s house, she quickly paid the cab driver, tipping him way too much but in truth, she was in a rush to be with Cosima and she would have paid anything. 

 

Delphine led Cosima towards her house, she pulled her into her hallway and pushed her hard against the door frame, slamming it shut. 

 

Before Cosima had a chance to register Delphine’s advances, the blonde had already rid herself and the brunette of their thick coats and shoes and was now running her hands mercilessly down Cosima’s neck and spine thrusting herself forward as she grabbed her lover's waist.

 

Cosima felt herself being led towards the bedroom where Delphine gently encouraged her to lay down on her bed. Delphine felt Cosima’s reservations and decided to slow things down. She straddled the brunette and slowly pulled her up to meet her lips. Delphine took her time to explore Cosima’s mouth, placing tender strokes on her lips with her tongue and delicately tugging on Cosima’s bottom lip with her teeth, all Cosima could do was moan in response. 

 

“Delphine…” Cosima finally managed to mutter.

 

“Oui Cosima, what’s wrong?” Delphine pulled away only to feel Cosima pull her immediately back.

 

“Nothing… nothing is wrong. I’m so happy Delphine like you have no idea. And whilst I have no idea why someone as perfect as you would ever want to be with someone… well someone like me, the truth is I’m nervous. You make me feel like a giddy little girl again and it’s just… the truth is I’ve never been with a woman before and I don’t want to disappoint you.”

 

Delphine stoked Cosima cheek lovingly and chuckled, “You’re nervous? Cosima, mon cheri, I’m terrified, I’ve never been with a women either, in fact…” Delphine’s eyes down as she felt the shame creep over her, “…I’ve never even had sex with someone that I truly care about. I’m trying to act confident, but I’m not and I know that you can see straight through my facade. I want to give you the most amazing night ever, I want to make love to you and make you quake underneath my touch just so that you can feel the way I feel even when you do the littlest things to me, like hold my hand or kiss my cheek.”

 

Cosima pulled Delphine’s head up and smiled into a kiss, “Really, is that what I make you feel like? Babe… you’re so cute, do you know that?” 

 

Delphine smiled coyly, “oui you do and oui I know I am.”

 

“Good, let’s just agree to let go of all inhibitions okay? It’s just you and me here, and I promise that nothing you do tonight or any other night for that matter could ever change how I feel about you.” 

 

“Promise…?” 

 

“I promise Delphine.”

 

Delphine nodded and gently pushed Cosima’s shoulders down until she was lying flat against her bed. Delphine tenderly kissed Cosima’s neck and shoulder as she unzipped the brunettes dress and slowly slid it off her body. Delphine sat and admired the body of the woman that was still beneath her, her petite frame, her hourglass figure that highlighted her curves, her smooth skin, and her supple breasts. 

 

“You’re so beautiful Cosima.” 

 

Cosima blushed.

 

Cosima sat up and lifted Delphine’s dress in a seductive manner above her head, slowly caressing the blonde's thighs, stomach, breasts, and neck on the way. Delphine shivered at her touch. Cosima examined Delphine’s body, stroking her sides up and down. She was so beautiful, slim, athletic with skin that effortlessly glowed. 

 

“Not as beautiful as you, mon bébé _(my baby)_ ” Cosima whispered.

 

Cosima wrapped her hands around Delphine’s neck and kissed her eagerly. Cosima slid her tongue into Delphine’s mouth, knowing that it would be more than welcomed. Both women caressed each other's tongues with their own as they rid each other of one another bra’s, gently cupping and stroking one another’s breasts. 

 

Cosima guided Delphine down until she lay flat on her back, dragging her lips down her now exposed chest, stopping to admire and kiss her firm nipples, before continuing to her and stomach, stopping above the panty line, looking up to stare into her eyes. She slowly pulled the garments down the blonde's legs and threw them aside. Cosima paused for a moment, she looked up into Delphine’s embarrassed expression and sat up to place a tender reassuring kiss on the blonde's lips. 

 

“Tu es parfait _(you are perfect)_ Delphine,” Cosima whispered into Delphine’s mouth before returning to her previous position. 

 

Delphine had never felt so conflicted. She wanted to give Cosima everything. She wanted to sacrifice herself to her love whole heartedly, she just hoped she could be enough for her. 

 

Delphine reached down, she stroked Cosima's cheek. Cosima smiled and spread Delphine's legs wider apart, the smell of arousal was overwhelming, Cosima had never felt so much anticipation before sex before, it was immense. She moved her head down and placed a gentle kiss on Delphine’s bare core.

 

Delphine’s breath hitched, she squealed squeezing her eyes shut. Cosima's smirk returned. She skilfully steered her tongue through Delphine’s slick folds, Cosima could feel Delphine’s back arch and her hips buck down. Cosima continued her exploration, altering the quickness and pressure of her tongue, never letting Delphine become complacent and equally never letting herself become predictable. Delphine pushed Cosima’s head down further into her core, the blonde bucked her hips into Cosima's face, welcoming Cosima’s new position, feeling her tongue press firmly against her clit.

 

Despite Delphine’s inability to focus on anything other than the explosion of nerve endings at the apex of her thighs, Delphine had never been more sure that she wanted, no she _needed_ Cosima to feel this. She needed to make Cosima scream her name and feel the same pleasure that she was feeling. 

 

In one fluid motion, Delphine pulled Cosima up so that she was sitting in her lap, she sucked her breasts eagerly as her left hand wrapped itself around Cosima’s waist, whilst the other teased the entrance of her lover's core. 

 

Cosima moaned into Delphine’s kiss and wrapped her hands tight around the blonde's neck. Delphine could taste herself on Cosima’s tongue, she had never tasted herself before. It was addictive, like her own personal brand of heroin, she knew that no matter how long she spent with Cosima, both in and out of the bedroom, it would never be long enough.

 

“I want us to come _together_ mon amour…” Delphine panted. 

 

Cosima’s pulled back slightly and looked into her eyes, both woman’s eyes darkened with desire. This was different, this was new. Neither woman had ever made love with such tenderness and consideration. All of their previous relationships had been about giving rather than receiving. 

 

Cosima, still straddled over Delphine's lap, reached in between the little space that was between them and resumed her teasing of Delphine clit, Delphine mirrored her actions causing the pair to moan simultaneously.  

 

“Mmmm me too Delphine, I want to feel you inside of me,” Cosima whispered, knowing the effect that they were having on one another.

 

With that, Delphine slid to fingers into Cosima’s core, eliciting a high pitched scream from the brunette, Delphine didn’t care that her neighbors/ co-workers/ bosses might hear her and Cosima’s love making. In fact, she wanted them to, she wanted everyone to know that she was the one making Cosima lose her mind. 

 

Both women quickened the pace, sliding two digits in and out of each other's hot, wet centers, each moaning and cursing as a result which only seemed to provoke the tenderness of their love-making. 

 

Considering neither woman had even been with any other _women_ before _,_ it was surprising how naturally this came to them both. Of course, this was because of who they were with, they drew out a side in each other, one of love and of trust, one of sacrifice and protection.

 

Feeling that they were both getting close to the edge, they gazed into each other's eyes, they kissed tenderly, moving their mouths to each other's breasts and neck, to each other's collarbones and earlobes. They laughed and cried, they were comfortable with one another, all their worries from earlier had gone completely, this was it. This is what all the fairy tales, love songs and romance films had been talking about. This was love in it’s purest form.

 

Both of the women breathed endearments of love with labored breaths, each breath was a welcome relief, reminding them that this was real, reminding them that they were being fulfilled to the fullest.

 

“Cosima… baise-moi _(fuck me)_ … I will never get enough of this”, Delphine whispered into Cosima’s ear.

 

Cosima squeezed Delphine tighter, she wanted to be close enough to feel as though she could literally melt into her if she tried hard enough. Cosima cupped Delphine’s cheek with her available hand, continuing to thrust inside her lover with her other whilst her palm grazed Delphine’s swollen clit. Cosima kissed Delphine’s lips and held them together, she didn't want to let go not ever. 

 

“Delphine….Oh! I'm ready baby, come for me please," the brunette encouraged sweetly. She pushed her fingers faster into Delphine’s core, curling her fingers inside, stroking Delphine’s sweet spot. Causing the blonde to quake beneath the brunette. Cosima couldn't pull her eyes away from Delphine’s beautiful face, the way the sweat fell from her forehead, the way her eyes started lovingly back into Cosima’s, the way her mouth hung open, she was moaning so often, there really was no point in closing it. 

 

“Mon amour… me too… I’m…come for me Cosima.”

 

“Mmmm say my name again.”

 

“Je ne te quitterais jamais _(I will never leave you)…._ Cosima” Delphine cried.

 

Delphine used her available hand to gently pinch Cosima’s swollen clit, causing her to buck and spasm uncontrollably in her arms. Delphine also came, hard, she screamed into Cosima’s shoulder, biting hard at the soft piece of flesh that lay there, a wave of pleasure continued to roll through both of their bodies, their hips rolling fast against on another. They weren't sure how long their orgasms had lasted, it had felt like a short eternity, they pulled each other close, just holding one another as they rode out the remains of the delicate aftershocks.

 

Delphine gently pulled her fingers out of her brunette and sucked her finger clean. Cosima watched her in awe, “Wow, Delphine you are… I mean, fuck you are amazing.” Cosima exclaimed, a smile plastered on her face; she also pulled her fingers out from her lover and licked the remains of their love-making, she would never tire of that taste, of Delphine’s taste. 

 

Delphine slowly kissed the brunette, each tasting of one another, she pulled away gazing into her eyes, “Cosima… that was, I don't have words. No one has ever- Cosima no _will_ ever make me feel the way you just did. I don’t want anyone else ever again.”

 

“Not even Leekie?” Cosima chuckled.

 

Delphine laughed and slapped the brunettes ass, “Why are you so cheeky? And Non, only you Cosima.” Delphine tucked a stray dreadlock behind her brunette's ear staring into her eyes.

 

“Delphine, me either, I only need you.” Cosima smiled and kissed the blonde's chest.

 

The blonde nodded, both women happily crying with tears of relief and… love. Of course, this was it, this was love. 

 

Delphine fell back onto her bed and pulled Cosima on to her chest, holding her tightly. They lay there in silence, Cosima's fingers moved along the French woman's stomach, each spelling out an expression of love.

 

Cosima turned to face Delphine and stroked her blonde locks, “Delphine…”

 

“Mmmm… oui mon amour” Delphine couldn’t remove the smile from her lips even if her life depended on it.

 

“What are we like… to each other?” Cosima asked softly.

 

Delphine rolled over confused, she hovered above Cosima, “I thought I just made my feelings for you perfectly clear.”

 

“You did, I just… I want to… there’s so much I want to tell you, Delphine. But it’s not going to be easy to hear…. I’m ashamed and I hate myself for the things I’ve done.” Cosima began crying uncontrollably, but this time, her tears were that of pure sadness.

 

Delphine pulled Cosima into her lap squeezing her tight, “Shhh it’s okay I’m here, I am here Cosima, it’s okay.”

 

“I promised myself that I wouldn't involve you in this, in any of it but… you're just… I can’t be without you, Delphine. Not after this, not after all we've been through in the last few days. I know its crazy, it’s illogical, but I don't think I can do this without you, but I’d also never forgive myself if anything every happened to you.”

 

Delphine pulled Cosima up to meet her gaze and wiped away her lover's tears. 

 

“J’taime Cosima. I'm not going anywhere, I want to be with you, as your friend, as your rock, as your lover. I want you all of you Cosima, the good and the bad. I love you.”

 

Cosima closed her eyes against Delphine’s chest “Mmm say that again, please.”

 

“I love you Cosima,” Delphine said as a tear rolled down her cheek onto Cosima’s shoulder. 

 

Cosima kissed Delphine softly, “I wanted to be the first one to say it but… I love you too Delphine, so much.” 

 

Delphine could feel the smile return to her lips, “You don't have to worry about me getting hurt Cosima, the only way that could ever happen is if I lost you, do you understand me?”

 

“I know me too, me too. We’re going to be okay Delphine, we’re going to make it through this I promise. I’m going to right my wrongs and it will all be over soon, we can be together the way you deserve.”

 

Delphine nodded and kissed her lover pulling her down into _their_ bed and spooned her lovingly caressing her stomach with gentle strokes. 

 

“Sleep mon cheri, we’re going to be okay. I’ll be here when you wake up I promise. I love you.” Delphine kissed Cosima’s shoulder.

 

“I love you more… Frenchie.” Cosima chuckled.

 

“Mhm your girlfriend is French, poor you,” Delphine said laughing quietly.

 

Cosima snuggled back into Delphine’s body “Mmmm girlfriend, I like the sound of that.”

 

“Me too mon amour. I am yours, and yours alone. You're the only one who gets to hold me and kiss me and make love to me… I’m yours exclusively.”

 

“Ditto babe. I mean, to be honest, after tonight you’ve ruined me for life, no one would ever be able to compare to you.” Cosima grinned. 

 

“Bon _(good)_ , that was my intention,” Delphine replied giggling. 

 

Cosima began laughing as well, “Well you’ve succeeded you're stuck with me now, poor you.”

 

“Non, lucky me,” Delphine said kissing Cosima lazily.

 

Cosima smiled, she moved herself to snuggle into Delphine’s chest, before long both women had fallen asleep wrapped up in each other's embrace.

 


	6. Unsteady

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is another chapter, if anyone is still reading this, thank you so much for sticking with it!
> 
> Thank you for all of your comments and kudos, I literally light up every time I see them :)
> 
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V0lw3qylVfY  
> \-------
> 
> WANING: DESCRIPTIONS OF CONFRONTATION & DRUG USE

Even without makeup, without fancy clothes and with her hair a mess Delphine still looked angelic in Cosima’s eyes. Cosima debated about whether to wake Delphine up or to let her rest but in the end, she decided that she couldn't spend another second alone wrapped up in Delphine’s embrace without hearing the French goddess’ voice. 

 

“Morning babe…” Cosima kissed Delphine’s cheek.

 

“Mmmmm” Delphine stirred in her lover's arms.

 

“Delphine, wake up” Cosima whispered into Delphine’s ear.

 

It was Monday morning, the pair would have to get up for work soon after spending every second of their beautiful weekend together. Friday night was spent fighting, then reconciling and cuddling up on the couch together. Saturday was their first date, the first time they made love and the first time they openly admitted to each other and themselves that they were hopelessly in love with one another. And Sunday was spent wrapped up with one another in bed, they made love, a lot, each time learning new ways to make their girlfriend moan with pleasure. As well as taking lazy naps tangled up with one another. It had been the best weekend both women had ever had. 

 

_BEEP… BEEP…BEEP._

 

Delphine reached across Cosima’s body and snoozed their alarm clock.

 

Cosima rolled over to face her lover whilst her hands remained firmly around her waist, “I don't want to go to work, I just want to stay here with you all day, just like this.”

 

“You _can_  spend all day with me, just fully clothed and in a lab. We can return to this exact position after work, I promise.” Delphine laughed.

 

Cosima pouted, “But I can’t kiss you or hold you or do any of the other fun activities that we done last night at the lab.” 

 

“Why not?” Delphine raised an eyebrow.

 

“Wait, what do you mean? Are you okay with people knowing about us?”

 

“I'm not just okay with that Cosima, I really, really want to tell people about us, I want to tell anyone and everyone about us. About how lucky I am to have a girlfriend like you.”

 

Cosima flashed Delphine a bright grin, “Mmmm so you can parade me around like your show pony?”

 

“Oui, my beautiful, intelligent, funny, caring show pony.” Delphine tenderly kissed Cosima’s cheek.

 

Cosima stoked Delphine's cheek, “me too, you have no idea. But I have to sort some things out first before we, you know…. go public. Can you wait a few days?”

 

Delphine sat up in their bed, “Why? What is there to sort out? You're not having second thoughts are you?”

 

Cosima sat up also pulling Delphine into a tight embrace, “No, God no. It’s just… I told you that I would tell you everything, and I will, it’s just I need to fix my mistakes first before I drag you into them. Please, let’s just keep this between us for now, just for a few days and then we can tell everyone.”

 

“When Cosima?” Delphine’s voice croaked. 

 

“When what? When can we tell people?” Cosima asked genuinely confused. 

 

“Non, when are you going to tell me about whatever it is that troubles you so much. I’m trying to be patient and understanding but I can’t help you if you won't let me in.”

 

“I will… soon, Delphine, I promise.”

 

The alarm rang again and this time, both women sighed, placing a warm, thoughtful kiss on each other's lips before they eventually rolled out of bed. 

 

Delphine reluctantly let Cosima return to her own house to get ready, deciding that she needed clean clothes and a reason not to arrive at work together. 

 

Delphine quickly showered and got dressed before she received a message from Paul telling her he was downstairs. Delphine left her house and joined him in the front seat of the car.

 

“Morning Paul, how are you this morning?” Delphine asked.

 

“Hey someone’s a lot more chipper this morning, I am very well thank you Delphine, and how are you?” Paul grinned.

 

“Bon, I’m good thank you” Delphine couldn't help the smiling from forming on her face.

 

“Mhmm I can see that.” Paul gave Delphine a sly wink. 

 

 _Mon Dieu (my God) does he know? Non. How could he? Did Cosima say something? Do I still smell like sex? Non, you’re being paranoid_.

 

The journey to work was pleasant, Delphine and Paul spoke about his family and his interests, Delphine was actually disappointed when they arrived at DYAD. She left the car and made her way into the building, she practically skipped towards the labs, filled with a new sense of optimism. 

 

Delphine hastily pushed the doors of the lab open to see Cosima speaking with Dr. Leekie.

 

Cosima turned around, startled by Delphine's entrance, “Dr. Cormier, would you mind giving Dr. Leekie and I a minute alone please?” Cosima looked straight into Delphine’s eyes pleading with the blonde not to fight her. 

 

“I… um… yes of course” Delphine left confused. 

 

Delphine entered the lab next to hers where the rest of her team were also waiting for the green light to return. Scott was pacing around the room.

 

Delphine walked over to her co-workers, “morning boys, why is Dr. Leekie talking with Cosima?” 

 

Scott turned to Delphine and snapped, “I don't know Delphine, I assume it's because you slept with him.”

 

“Excuse me? How dare you, Scott! I didn't sleep with Dr. Leekie!”

 

“Oh no? Well maybe you should have, maybe then he wouldn't be in there with Cosima.”

 

Delphine bit back, “what? Both I and Cosima are full grown women Scott, we can handle ourselves. Cosima doesn’t need you fighting her corner for her!”

 

“Jesus Delphine, you are so clueless!” Scott screamed, making Delphine jump.

 

“Is that right? THEN PLEASE ENLIGHTEN ME SCOTT, WHAT AM I MISSING?!” Delphine screamed in return.

 

With that Cosima walked in, her eyes red, she had clearly been crying. 

 

Delphine walked over to the brunette and put an arm on her shoulder “Are you okay? Cosima, what's wrong? What did Dr. Leekie say?”

 

Cosima glanced up at Scott and stared at him before looking at Delphine, “Don’t worry it’s nothing I can’t handle okay?”

 

“Non, Cosima, not okay. What’s wrong?”

 

“Delphine I am trying, believe me, I am. I told you I needed to fix things and I’m trying, I need you to give me space. Scott, I need to speak to you outside. Now.”

 

Cosima walked towards the door and held it open for Scott, ushering for him to join her in the lab next door. The pair entered the empty lab and Scott looked to Cosima for answers.

 

“What the FUCK was that Scott huh?”

 

“Cosima… I’m sorry, I was just worried about you and she kept asking me questions… and I snapped.”

 

“Would you have told her Scott?” Cosima’s head dropped. 

 

“No Cosima, of course not, I just… Cosima, I told you that your secret is safe with me and it is, always.”

 

“Good, okay, now go and apologize to Delphine and send everyone back in here, we have work to do.”

 

Scott simply nodded his head and followed Cosima’s instructions.

 

When the group returned Cosima’s usual grin had returned to her face. She debriefed the team on their progress so far and gave each member an assignment for the day. 

 

The group worked practically in silence until it was time for lunch. Everyone had left the lab except Scott and Delphine who were still packing up their equipment.

 

“Delphine?” Scott said, his voice riddled with guilt.

 

Delphine turned to face him, “Oui Scott.”

 

“I am so sorry about earlier. I lost my temper with you and that was not okay. I just care so much about Cosima and honestly Delphine I care about you too. I see you both like my sisters and I… I know how much of a creep Dr. Leekie can be and I just wanted to protect Cosima.”

 

“I know, it’s okay, that's all I wanted to do as well…. Please, Scott, tell me what's going on with her.”

 

Scott shook his head, “I can’t Delphine, only she can do that.”

 

Scott turned to leave that lab, just before he walked out the door he turned to Delphine, “Oh and Delphine… you and Cosima make a really cute couple. I haven't seen her this happy in years.”

 

“What?” Delphine asked stunned. _How could he know? there was no way anyone could know._

 

He shrugged his shoulders, his only response was “a brother always knows, welcome to the family Delphine.”

 

Delphine smiled to herself. _Family_. She finally had a family out here, someone who would look out for her and protect her. That’s all she has ever wanted. 

 

Delphine decided to work through lunch, Cosima had asked for space and Delphine was happy to oblige. 

 

The rest of the group had returned from lunch and the afternoon had yet again passed in relative silence. Scott occasionally looked up from his work and offered a reassuring smile to Delphine, this was only a small gesture but it was greatly appreciated by the blonde. Delphine could feel Cosima staring at her countless times throughout the afternoon. Delphine wanted nothing more than to look up and meet the gaze of her girlfriend, to hold her and tell her that everything was going to be okay, but she resisted. 

 

As the day drew to a close, Cosima sent the team home early, thanking them for all their hard work. The boys exited the lab swiftly, sensing that the two women needed some alone time. 

 

After the boys had left, Cosima walked up behind Delphine and snaked her arms around the blonde's stomach pulling her into a tight embrace resting her head on her lover's back. 

 

“Babe, I’m sorry about this morning, I didn’t mean to dismiss your questions or your worries.”

 

Delphine pulled out of the embrace and began to pack up her things, “I thought you said you needed space.”

 

“Don’t do that Delphine.”

 

“Don’t do what Cosima?”

 

“Don’t act like a little brat who's sulking because she didn’t get her way” Cosima barked.

 

Delphine turned to give Cosima her full attention, “really is that how you think I’m behaving?”

 

“Yes! You stayed in here during lunch, you kept ignoring me every time I looked at you. You haven't even spoken to me since this morning!”

 

Delphine exhaled slowly, “I’m trying to honor your wishes Cosima, you said you needed space and I’m trying not to push you,” Delphine said sincerely. 

 

“Delphine… I didn’t literally mean I need space between us…” Cosima walked towards her girlfriend and pulled her into a tight hug. “I just meant that I needed to sort this out before you ask me questions and expect answers.”

 

Delphine pulled back slightly so she could meet her lovers gaze, “ I know, I’m sorry I don't mean to sound so childish, it’s just… I hate that there’s something hurting you and I can't fix it.”

 

“You did… you are fixing it, Delphine. You're here now with me, you have no idea how much this means to me.” Cosima rested her head against Delphine’s shoulder.

 

Delphine kissed Cosima’s forehead, “Non, mon amour I have every idea how much it means to you, I understand completely”, Delphine offered her warmest smile.

 

Cosima cupped Delphine’s cheek and kissed her passionately. Delphine gently pushed Cosima up against the table and the brunette happily climbed up on to it so that their faces could be level.

 

Cosima whispered “I love you Delphine” against the blonde's lips.

 

“I love you too, and you got to say it first this time.” Delphine smiled into a kiss and slid her hand up her girlfriend's thigh and firmly pressed against her lover's core. 

 

Cosima pulled away, “no, no, no Delphine I can not have sex with you right now.”

 

“Why not? Don’t you want to feel me inside you mon cheri?” Delphine grinned. 

 

Cosima groaned in an uncharacteristically low voice which made Delphine laugh.

 

“You have no idea how much I want you inside me right now… but I…never mind.” Cosima kissed Delphine again.

 

Delphine pulled away gently, “You what?” Delphine asked me a raised eyebrow.

 

Cosima looked passed Delphine’s shoulder to the clock that hung on the lab wall, “I… have a meeting I need to go to… like now.”

 

Delphine pulled away completely out of Cosima’s embrace backing away from her, “Cosima everyone has gone home, what meeting could you possibly have to go to?”

 

Cosima stepped forwards towards her girlfriend, “Delphine please don't get mad again, please, just listen-”

 

“Who is your meeting with Cosima?”

 

‘Delphine-“

 

“-Cosima who is it with?”

 

“I can’t…”

 

“Cosima, tell me now.”

 

“No. Don’t- please- you need to trust me.”

 

“COSIMA!” Delphine snapped. 

 

“Dr. Leekie” Cosima’s voice was barely a whisper.

 

“What?” Delphine could hear her ears ringing. _At this time? No one has meetings at this time unless..._

 

“That’s why he came by this morning, to schedule a meeting.” Cosima sighed. 

 

Delphine’s heart sank. She could hear her heart beating in her ear. She began crying and she didn't even realize. _It can’t be. She wouldn’t. Not after all of this… she wouldn't do that to me._

 

“No babe don’t-“ Cosima reached a hand out to wipe away Delphine’s tears, only to have her hand batted away by the blonde. 

 

“Don’t touch me. Don't you _dare_ touch me.” There it was again, the emotionless voice, the numbness, only this time, it was worse, this time, Delphine didn't know if she would recover. She couldn't feel any emotion at that moment and that scared her more than anything, it’s as though a circuit had blown in her mind and heart and she was senseless.

 

Cosima took a step back. “It’s not what you think Delphine. I-”

 

Delphine looked at her girlfriend, “Yes or no Cosima. This is what we are going to do now. Understood?” Delphine looked beyond angry. 

 

“Yes” Cosima’s voice was low, she knew what was coming.

 

“Have… are you having sex with Dr. Leekie?” Delphine asked without so much as flinching. 

 

Cosima began crying, “Yes.”

 

“Has it been going on for longer than a few months?” Delphine continued stoically.

 

“Yes.”

 

“Has it been going on for more than a year?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Do you have sex with him every week?”

 

“Sometimes.”

 

“Okay, do you have sex with him anytime he asks?"

 

“Yes.”

 

“Is this the secret you wouldn't tell me?”

 

“Part of it yes.”

 

“Is this why Scott snapped earlier, does he know about you and Dr. Leekie?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“Does he make you come?”

 

“What?”

 

“Does he make you come?”

 

“Delphine-“

 

“Does he make you come?” Delphine asked irritably. 

 

Cosima sniffled, “yes.”

 

Delphine pursed her lips, “Does he make love to you better than I do?”

 

“NO, it’s not-“

 

Delphine scoffed, “Do you love him?”

 

“NO!” Cosima yelled as the tears continued. 

 

“Do you love me?” Delphine continued with a blank expression. 

 

“YES! Delphine! How could you even ask-“

 

“-Last question and so help me God Cosima I will know if you're lying… are you going to have sex with him tonight?”

 

Cosima broke down. She slid down to the floor, her forehead in her hands. Delphine wasn't registering Cosima’s tears, her pain, Delphine didn't feel the need to comfort her or reassure her. It was as though all of the nerve endings in her body had been shot. Delphine was in complete and utter shock, she was shaking uncontrollably, however being a doctor she knew that she wouldn't be able to process this tonight, no it would hit her eventually and it would hurt her more than she had ever been hurt before.

 

“Are you going to have sex with him tonight?” 

 

Silence, only Cosima’s cries could be heard. 

 

“Are you going to have sex with him tonight?” Delphine yelled impatiently.

 

“YES but Delphine you need to understand- you need to let me explain- please- babe” Cosima was gasping for air, she was having a panic attack and she couldn't stop it. 

 

Delphine exhaled deeply and calmly said, “There is nothing you could say that could justify this Cosima. Nothing… You said you loved me and yet you were going to sleep with someone else, a man none the less. Is that it, do I not please you?”

 

Before Cosima could respond Delphine continued, “Funny thing is, a few days ago you called me easy because you thought I had slept with him while the whole time it was you that had, you had _already_ slept with him… What was this weekend to you Cosima? An experiment? A distraction? A bit of fun? All that bullshit about fantasying about me for months and falling hard and fast for me- about loving me and being my girlfriend. All those kisses and all that laughter- all those times we made love and all those meaningful discussions we had, and for what? What was the point? And all that money you wasted on our first date- well actually- I put out for you so I guess it wasn't completely wasted was it? At least you got some.”

 

“DEL-“ Cosima screamed in between her panting.

 

Delphine cut her off,  “-How could I have been so _stupid_?… I never lied to you Cosima, everything I said, everything I felt was real. When I was lying with you in my bed, holding you, I was planning our lives, our futures together. I was willing to give myself to you wholeheartedly and just allow myself to fall for you completely, just this once I was going to let my guard down and be genuinely happy. You was right the other night when you said that you don't deserve me because honestly, you were right, you don’t. I am sorry that I wasted my love on you. Goodbye, Cosima.”

 

Delphine didn't want to hear the answer, she didn't _need_ to hear the answer, she no longer cared. Delphine turned around and left the lab. She could hear Cosima literally screaming with hurt and anger as she walked away down the corridor. 

 

She got into the car with Paul and continued her conversation from this morning as though nothing had happened. She laughed when he told a joke and smiled when he said something sweet about his family, all fake gesture's of course, he didn't need to know that she was dead on the inside. 

 

Paul pulled up outside Delphine’s house, Delphine looked over at Cosima’s dark house, she knew that the house would be vacant for many more hours to come. 

 

Paul looked at Delphine, “I’ll see you tomorrow morning, normal time”. Delphine nodded and walked towards her home. 

 

Once inside Delphine found herself standing in her bathroom just looking at herself in the mirror. She didn't even recognize herself. This morning she had been beaming, glowing with her new found love and radiating happiness, and now… she was pale, her nose was red, her hair flat and her eye was sunken. She reached inside her medicine cabinet and pulled out a little orange pill bottle. 

 

_Don’t. Don’t do this Delphine. She isn’t worth it… but she is. No. She isn’t. Dr. Leekie is welcome to her, he can kiss her and hold her and… make love to her._

 

Delphine needed to silence her thoughts- she opened the little bottle and popped more than a few Zoloft, it only took a few seconds. A few seconds to relapse, to fall into old habits. 

 

“PUTAIN! _(Fuck)_ ” Delphine screamed, she punched the mirror in front of her, she couldn't bare to look at the person she had become. Weak and alone, she couldn't stand the fact that she had relapsed, this wasn't who she was, or was it? Was this the new Delphine? 

 

Delphine was so lost she hadn't even noticed her hand bleeding heavily, shards of glass and blood splatters covering her entire bathroom surface. 

 

“Fils de pute _(son of a bitch)…”_ Delphine cried.

 

The floodgates had opened. Delphine could feel everything. The betrayal and the hurt. The vulnerability and the rejection. Why had she not been enough for Cosima? What had she done wrong? She had gotten too close too quickly and now she was paying the price. 

 

Delphine wrapped her hand in a towel and sat on top of her toilet staring into a blank void, the tears were brutal, they were never ending, each feeling like knives as they fell from Delphine’s eyes. 

 

5 years. She hadn't needed pills to cope in 5 whole years. She just wanted to forget. Forget about Dr. Leekie and what he would be doing to Cosima right now. How he would be fucking her and how she would be letting him. She wanted to forget about Cosima period. The Zoloft helped, Delphine downed the pills followed by a bottle, or two, of wine and let them take her to an ignorant state of bliss. 

 

She would forget about Cosima, for a few hours at least, but tomorrow would be no easy feat. Delphine would show Cosima that she would move on, that she would survive without the brunette.  

 

Although, after all, they had been through in the last few days, how could she carry on without her?


	7. One Way Or Another

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the kudos and comments I've received in the past 24 hours, your support means so much!
> 
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n8cMBTAQJgo
> 
> WANING: DESCRIPTIONS OF VIOLENCE.

Delphine awoke still extremely hazed. She stumbled off of her bedroom floor and made her way into her bathroom witnessing the remains of her relapse. Blood and glass everywhere, a bloody hand towel and an empty pill bottle lay there silently mocking her. 

 

Delphine had a cold shower, hoping that the freezing water on her skin would distract her from her mind. She dressed quickly in her sexiest black work dress, complete with heels and a full face of makeup. Delphine started at her newly made-up face in the mirror. _Fake it. Smile and play the game, Delphine._

 

Paul picked Delphine up exactly when he said he would, the ride to work was the same, filled with more anecdotes of their lives before each other. Delphine arrived at DYAD and told Paul she would see him later. 

 

Delphine was walking towards the lab before she remembered what would be waiting for her once she arrived. Coming into work this morning with her tough facade on full display, she had forgotten what she was walking into until it was too late and she was at the door of the lab. 

 

Delphine swung open the lab door and to her surprise the lab was empty. She had expected that Cosima may be a no show but what about the guys, it was not like them to be late. 

 

Delphine checked the surround labs and still no success, her sector of the lab was completely abandoned. _What is going on? Where is everyone?_

 

Delphine began walking towards the main lobby in an attempt to get a better phone signal. She planned to call Scott and find out where her team was, why they weren’t here and why no one thought to tell her. 

 

Delphine turned the corner to head towards the elevator and there he was. Walking towards her down an extremely narrow corridor, no one around, no one to witness if she punched him or kicked him hard between his thighs. _No, play the game,_ Delphine thought to herself. _Don’t think about how he had sex with your girl- with Cosima- last night. Don’t think about how he got to touch her and make love to her- despite Cosima’s promise of exclusivity. Remember it was all a lie from the beginning- it was a game to Cosima- it wasn’t real, it wasn't real, none of it was real._

 

When the two had gotten closer, Dr. Leekie stopped just short of Delphine, “Dr. Cormier, I didn’t expect you to be here.”

 

Delphine smiled at her boss, “Really? Why not? I work here.”

 

Her smile was reciprocated, “I just assumed you would be with the rest of your team that’s all.”

 

“I was just looking for them actually, do you know where I could find them?”

 

Dr. Leekie met Delphine’s gaze, “in fact, now you mention it I haven't seen Cosima since last night.”

 

 _Fucking_ _Asshole_. _Does he know? He must know! Cosima must have told him. He is doing this to taunt me._

 

“Oh okay, I’ll go and call Scott, thank you anyway Dr. Leekie.” Delphine smiled and turned her body to walk away. 

 

Dr. Leekie obstructed Delphine's path and stepped forward towards the blonde until there was no space left between them. Delphine shivered in disgust, “wait, you mean you really didn't hear?” Dr. Leekie asked.

 

“Hear what?” Delphine raised an eyebrow. 

 

“Hmm Dr. Cormier what kind of team player are you?” Dr. Leekie’s smile turned sinister, Delphine was apprehensive.  

 

“Excuse me? What is that supposed to mean?” Delphine barked, she would not let Dr. Leekie see her reservations. 

 

Dr. Leekie glared down at the blonde with a sly grin plastered on his face, “well then again, I guess you're not exactly a team player, are you? No, one-on-one is far more your game is it not?”

 

Delphine bit her tongue and clenched her fist. _He definitely knows_. “where are the rest of my team Dr. Leekie?”

 

“I’ll let you figure that one out for yourself, since your such an intelligent woman. We will speak soon Dr. Cormier, you’re going to want to speak to me, I guarantee it. Oh and next time you see Cosima, send her my regards.” Dr. Leekie continued on his journey leaving Delphine confused and intimidated. 

 

 _Fuck. ‘Send Cosima my regards’_ , he was definitely better at playing this game than Delphine was. _What did he mean ‘you’re going to want to speak to me’? That is the last thing I would ever want to do._

 

Delphine finally reached the lobby and called Scott.

 

“Hello?” Scott’s voice was hoarse as though he had been screaming.

 

“Allo Scott it’s me, where are you guys, no one is here?” Delphine responded. 

 

Silence.

 

“Allo Scott?” Delphine tried again.

 

“Yeah I’m still here Delphine. I just… fuck. You're going to find out eventually anyway.” Scott croaked.

 

“Find out what Scott?”

 

“We’re at Mount Sinai Hospital, it’s Cosima… Delphine she-”

 

“-I'm coming.” Delphine didn't think. Cosima was hurt, there was no time to think, she ran outside. 

Delphine ran to the closest cab and demanded a ride to the hospital. Her mind buzzing, it wouldn't settle. _Cosima what? What was wrong with her?_

 

Once the cab had stopped, Delphine chucked money at the driver and ran into the hospital. She gave the nearest nurse Cosima’s name and told her that she was her fiancé, she never would have been allowed to see her otherwise, right? Or at least that’s what Delphine told herself.

 

Delphine followed the nurse and burst through the double doors of the ICU and saw Cosima lying there covered in cuts and bruises, two black eyes, a busted lip and bruised finger marks on her throat, her wrists and arms and that only what could be seen on the surface who knows where else she was hurt. She was hooked up to a ventilator, she was in a coma unable to breathe on her own. 

 

Scott, Randy, and Peter were all at Cosima’s bedside crying. Delphine ran over to them placing a reassuring hand on each of their shoulders. 

 

“Scott, what happened?” Delphine asked crying herself. 

 

Scott stood up and looked at Delphine, “Dr. Leekie happened.”

 

Delphine’s breath hitched. 

 

_I am going to kill him. He will pay for this._


	8. Stay With Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always thank you to everyone who has left kudos or commented! 
> 
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-rC8RRXcfeo
> 
> WANING: REFERENCES TO VIOLENCE

**ONE WEEK LATER**

Cosima had been placed in a medically induced coma in order to allow her brain to heal. She was getting better, she was stable and her contusions had near enough completely faded. 

 

Today the doctors would attempt to bring her out of her coma, Delphine hadn't left her side since it happened faking illness from work, allowing Scott to cover for her, only leaving her side for a maximum of 30 minutes a day to go home and change. 

 

To Delphine's relief, Cosima had responded well to her treatments, she was finally out of her coma and resting. Brain scans and ultrasounds revealed nothing life threatening, Cosima would be okay. _She would be okay, she would be okay,_ Delphine kept telling herself.

 

Delphine had told the police what had happened. That Dr. Leekie had attacked Cosima and nearly killed her. They did nothing. Dr. Leekie was a very powerful man, with very powerful friends in all of the right places. There was no way that a conviction would ever happen, Delphine knew she would have to take matters into her own hands.

 

Delphine had fallen asleep at Cosima’s bedside with the brunettes hand clasped firmly in hers. Delphine was awoken by giggling.

 

Delphine looked up dazed. “You are adorable when you sleep do you know that?” Cosima chuckled in her normal cheeky tone. 

 

Delphine leaped up and over to Cosima. She fiercely began examining the brunettes injuries as she fought back the tears that were clouding her vision. Delphine pulled back, she couldn't breathe, she couldn't calm herself down. Cosima was awake, she was alright. 

 

Cosima pulled her in tightly and encouraged the blonde to rest her head on her shoulder. Delphine clung to Cosima as though she was grabbing hold of her own life. Cosima began crying, she rocked Delphine back and forth. 

 

“Shhh I’ve got you. Breathe Delphine, I’m okay, I’m okay but I need you to breathe for me. Breathe”

 

Delphine took in one large breath, she wasn't even aware that she wasn't breathing until glorious oxygen entered her lungs and forced her to cough. 

 

“Good girl, it’s okay I’m here, I’m okay Delphine. I promise I’m okay. The doctors came in when you were sleeping, they're sending me home tonight.” Cosima brushed Delphine’s hair behind her ear.

 

Delphine pulled back still crying, “NO you're not Cosima what happened? Was this Dr. Leekie? Did he do this?” Although Delphine already knew the answer. 

 

“I… I didn't sleep with him, Delphine,” Cosima answered. 

 

“Is that why he did this? Because you didn't have sex with him?”

 

“Yes.” Cosima looked down.

 

Delphine cupped the brunette's checks and rested her forehead against hers, “this is all my fault Cosima, I’m so sorry… I wouldn't have… If I would have know… I’m going to…”

 

Cosima slowly brought her arms around Delphine’s neck, “No Delphine. Shhh it's not your fault, I couldn't sleep with Dr. Leekie because I love you and I couldn’t hurt you like that. When you said that I didn’t love you… well that _you thought_ that I didn't love you, that I was lying the whole time about my feelings for you, Delphine that broke me. I love you more than my own life… clearly, I mean look at me.” Cosima stifled a sad smile and chuckled. 

 

“Cosima- I love you. If anything would have happened to you- the thing’s I said to you before it happened- I…I’m so sorry.”

 

Cosima pulled Delphine in and squeezed her with everything she had, “It’s okay you had every right to be angry and hurt, I lied to you. “

 

“Listen to me, I don't care that you have sex with him, I just… I need you and if I have to share you with him then I will.”

 

“No Delphine, you don't deserve that.” Cosima shook her head. “No more. Okay? Do you hear me, Delphine, there is no more Dr. Leekie and I. I ended it with him, all of it, after you left the lab. There is no one else Delphine, only you.”

 

Delphine smiled through her tears, “from here until I die, it's just you and I okay?” Delphine kissed Cosima gently. 

 

Cosima chuckled, “did you just quote a song lyric?”

 

Delphine swatted the brunette's arm, “non! Cosima how are you trying to make a joke right now?”

 

Cosima cupped Delphine cheeks in her hands, “because despite my injuries, I have you, you’re my… fiancé… apparently” Cosima laughed, “and that is enough to make me smile through anything.”

 

Delphine smiled and stroked her lover's cheek, “Cosima- you need to talk to me.”

 

“I know, I will tonight. Stay with me tonight, I’ll tell you everything Delphine- but you just need to promise me that… that you won’t hate me because if I thought that you did I-“ Cosima’s tears fell freely.

 

“-It’s okay, it’s okay. This is it Cosima. I thought I lost you once… when they said that you were in a coma…I… I’m never going to let you go again.”

 

“Good, I like the idea of you holding onto me forever… even if you did mean it metaphorically.” Cosima stifled a laugh into Delphine neck, inhaling her distinct scent, God how she missed that smell.

 

“Oui, forever.” Delphine climbed into Cosima’s bed and fell back next to her, letting Cosima cuddle her and nuzzle into her neck

 

“Does this mean that you’re my girlfriend again?” Cosima said looking up at Delphine with a cheeky grin.

 

Delphine laughed, it felt good to laugh again, “Really? You know that you sound like a 10-year-old right now.”

 

“Mhmm I know. Sooooooo…?”

 

“Mon amour, I just declared my undying love for you, I told you that I would never leave you and I lied to a nurse just so I could say that I was your fiancé… and you want to know if you're still my girlfriend?” Delphine smiled at the brunette. 

 

“Yep.”

 

“Yes Cosima Niehaus, I will be your girlfriend again.” Delphine kissed her girlfriend and stroked her cheek. 

 

Cosima eventually pulled away and smiled, “good… and I knew it.”

 

Delphine smiled and raised an eyebrow, “knew what?”

 

“I knew you told the nurse that I was your fiancé because you _wanted_ to, not because you _had_ to.”

 

Delphine blushed and smiled coyly, “have you got a problem with that?”

 

Cosima gazed into Delphine’s eyes, “no, just so long as I can take your last name. Cosima Cormier sounds unbelievably sexy!” Cosima beamed. 

 

Delphine pulled Cosima closer to her and whispered on her lips “oui okay Mrs Cormier” and kissed her tenderly.

 

Both women laughed and melted into each other's embrace. Their fingers were intertwined and they soon fell into old patterns of deep discussions and tight hugs and soft kisses. 

 

The day rest of the day passed surprisingly quickly. The doctors came in regularly to prepare Cosima for her discharge whilst performing last minute check ups, giving Cosima aftercare advice and booking her in for follow up appointments. 

 

The guys stopped by after work to check on their buddy. They all screamed with joy and practically jumped on the brunette when they realized that she was awake. As the afternoon passed, they discussed Scott's new game, which Cosima had already played and mastered, naturally. They filled her in on their progress in the lab and promised to take her skydiving and bungee jumping after she had been so ‘ _lazy_ ’ the past week, Delphine laughed as she saw Cosima’s eyes light up at the idea.

 

“Non! Cosima! You are not going skydiving or bungee jumping understood?”

 

“You’re no fun! C’mon babe it will be fun! You can push me out of a plane and not feel guilty about it.” Cosima chuckled, _God it feels good to hear her laughing again_ , Delphine thought.

 

“One day I will, not anytime soon, d’accord _(okay)_?”

 

“Oui” Cosima jokingly pouted.

 

“So…” Randy began.

 

“Yes Randy?” Cosima asked.

 

“Well…” Peter countered, “does this mean that you two are like official you know? Like, are you _together together_?”

 

“Oh shit yeah, we never actually told you guys did we?” Cosima smiled at them.

 

“No mon amour, we didn’t, you wouldn't let me tell anyone.” Delphine smiled back. 

 

“Babe! Look at me, this is what happened the last time I tried to tell someone, can you blame me?” Cosima laughed loudly, she was over the initial shock of her incident, she had clarity- she was free from Leekie and she had Delphine and that’s all that mattered. 

 

“I’m sorry.” Delphine suddenly looked unbearably guilty. 

 

“No Delphine! I’m only messing with you! I’m okay. Actually, I’m better than okay- I’m great. I feel lighter.” Cosima took Delphine hand in her own and offered her a gentle squeeze which saw Delphine smile return.

 

Cosima looked at Randy and Peter, “yes boys, Delphine and I are together. We know it’s quick. Hell we've been friends, girlfriends, exes and kind of finances all in the space of like 2 weeks, but we’re happy- so, so, so happy- and it feels right you know?” Delphine lovingly and gently pecked Cosima’s lips, aware they had an audience. 

 

“Finally!” Peter exclaimed.

 

“I know! Jesus Christ! What took you so long?” Randy laughed.

 

“What?” Delphine asked confused.

 

“We knew you’d end up together since Cos introduced you to us! She couldn't stop staring at you- actually, you couldn't stop staring at each other!” Peter explained.

 

Both women blushed, Cosima swatted Peter’s arm, “yes, yes I know! I fell for the French woman we get it.”

 

“And I fell for the geeky Canadian” Delphine squeezed Cosima’s hand tighter. 

 

It was getting late, Cosima would need to be taken home soon, the boys got the message. They began to say their goodbyes and promised to come by her house and check on her tomorrow. 

 

“Oh Delphine…” Scott began.

 

“Yes, Scott.”

 

“Can I grab you for a sec… outside.” Scott asked quietly, out of Cosima’s earshot. Cosima was still saying goodbye to Randy and Peter, she wouldn't notice if the two slipped out for a second. 

 

Delphine followed Scott to the hospital corridor.  

 

“Is everything okay Scott?” Delphine asked worriedly.

 

“No Delphine. She could have died. She nearly _did_ die Delphine.” Scott began crying.

 

Delphine pulled him into a hug, “I know Scott, I know. But she didn’t, she's okay, her test results came back normal, she is fine.”

 

Scott slowly pulled out of their hug, “we can’t let him get away with this Delphine.”

 

Delphine nodded, “I know Scott, we won’t.”

 

“We need to make him pay” Scott cried again. 

 

Delphine’s eye immediately met his, “I know but Scott we-“

 

“-No Delphine don't ‘Scott’ me. I’m going to do this, are you with me or not?” Scott asked fiercely. 

 

Delphine didn't even need to think, “oui… I’m in. But we’re not going to talk about this here, not now. I don't know what you're thinking Scott but we are not going to hurt him, we are certainly not going to _kill_ him do you understand me?”

 

“Why not? He deserves it!”

 

“Firstly, Cosima wouldn't want that, she would never forgive either of us Scott and you know it. Plus he doesn’t deserve the chance to heal, or take the easy way out, we’re not going to stoop to his level of violence. We’re going to destroy him and we’re going to do it the smart way, we’re going to beat him at his own game okay?” Delphine couldn't believe the words coming out of her mouth.

 

“Okay.”

 

“Okay” that's all Delphine could say. 

 

In truth, this was something she had been thinking about since it happened, every time she looked over at Cosima’s still body she felt her anger grow deeper. Believe it or not, this was one of the easiest decisions Delphine had ever made. Someone had hurt her love, in fact, they openly sought to cause her pain, Dr. Leekie could have easily killed her and Delphine knew that he wouldn't even feel the slightest bit of guilt or remorse if he had, what he did is unforgivable and Dr. Leekie would pay.

 

Scott wiped his eyes and placed his arms on Delphine’s shoulders, “listen to me, Delphine… if it was you. If he had hurt you… I would do the same thing. Do you understand? The guys and you and Cos, you are my family. If _anyone_ ever hurt you Delphine, they would pay just the same okay?”

 

“I know Scott, I love you, I love all of you.” Delphine grabbed Scott and pulled him into a tight hug.

 

“I love you too.”

 

Eventually, after a teary embrace with Delphine, Scott retrieved Peter and Randy and they left. 

 

Later, Cosima was finally discharged and she and Delphine took a cab back to the brunette's house.

 

When they arrived home Delphine helped Cosima into her bed and changed her into her comfiest pyjamas. Delphine helped herself to Cosima’s oversized shirt and a pair of the brunettes boxers and joined her in bed. Cosima snuggled into Delphine’s side and listened to Delphine's heart beat through her chest. 

 

“Babe are you tired?” Cosima whispered into the blonde's chest.

 

“Non I don’t want to fall asleep.”

 

“Why?” Cosima asked softly.

 

“In case this is a dream. I’m scared I’ll wake up next to your hospital bed and you’ll still be comatose.” Delphine answered honestly.  

 

Cosima hovered above her girlfriend and kissed her deeply, she placed Delphine's hand on her heart and whispered, “do you fee this? This is real, I’m here Delphine.”

 

Delphine stroked her lover's cheek and nodded understanding the brunette's reassurance. 

 

“Do you want to- are you ready for me to tell you everything?”

 

Delphine sat up against the headboard and pulled Cosima into the space between her thighs embracing her tightly. She wrapped her legs around her little love, “I’m ready Cosima, I love you no matter what.”

 

Cosima inhaled deeply, this was _not_ going to be easy….

 


	9. All Of Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for sticking with this and reading it! I appreciate all of your comments and kudos! As I mentioned in previous comments, I thought I knew where this was going but now I'm not so sure if I want to end it how I originally planned because I really want everyone to get the ending that they are hoping for. So, on that note, if anyone feels really passionately about the way they want this to end drop me a comment and I'll see what I can do!
> 
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=450p7goxZqg
> 
> P.S. I'm not a scientist or doctor so please excuse the lack of accuracy in some parts.

Cosima didn't know where to begin- she was at war with her own thoughts. _At the beginning? With the hardest part or the easiest? Do I tell her everything? Yes, she deserves the whole truth but can she handle it? Will she leave me if I tell her?_

 

 

Silence _._

 

Sensing Cosima hesitance, Delphine squeezed the brunette still wrapped up in her embrace, “it’s okay Cosima nothing you could say now would change how I feel about you.”  

 

Cosima began crying, “I’m sick Delphine.”

 

Delphine chuckled softly unaware of the brunettes tears, “no you’re fine Cosima, you're out of the coma, you're healing, you're going to be okay mon amour, I’m going to take care of you.” Delphine reassured. 

 

“No Delphine…not like that” Cosima couldn't bring herself to tell her the truth. _How do you even begin to tell the women that you love that you're not going to be here to love her forever no matter how much you want to be?_

 

 _“_ Shh it’s okay, what is it Cosima?” Delphine cooed. 

 

“I’m dying Delphine” Cosima panted. 

 

Delphine spun Cosima round so that they were facing one another, “Wait, you’re… you’re what? Because of Leekie's attack, I thought the doctors said that you were okay?” 

 

Cosima let her head drop, she couldn't look into Delphine’s eyes. She couldn't bear to see the look of hurt and heartbreak, “No, I have this disease, this really rare auto-immune disease, similar to the one we study in the lab. But it’s fatal if untreated. And I… I can't get treatment for it anymore.”

 

“…How long? How long have you had it.”

 

“I got symptoms a few years ago, 2 and a half to be exact.”

 

“What? I… why Cosima? Why can't you treat it anymore?” Delphine’s lip quivered. 

 

“Dr. Leekie… he has a cure, well more like vaccine… well kinda. I have a shot once a month and it gets rid of my symptoms completely. It’s like a miracle drug. However, when the shot wears off I get sick again.” Cosima finally looked up at Delphine and stroked her cheek.

 

“Okay, we'll get you some more shots, I’m an immunologist, I can easily make you a cure from a vaccine Cosima, I can cure you permanently…” Delphine stoked Cosima’s arms and placed kisses all over her girlfriend's face.

 

“Delphine…it’s not that simple… Dr. Leekie keeps the shots to himself. Only he knows the formula, it’s not officially registered as a treatment, it hasn't been approved by any organization. He treats me and a couple of other girls, Sarah and Alison, so long as we…” Cosima sniffled.

 

“So long as you sleep with him?”

 

“Yes… I tried so many times to stop Delphine believe me. I tried to report him for blackmail, I tried to steal a shot, I tried to trace its formula through my blood samples but nothing worked. Each time he’d just beat me and tell me that I’d be lucky if he treated me again.”

 

Delphine cried, “how could I have gotten this so wrong?”

 

“It's okay.” Cosima stroked Delphine’s shoulders. 

 

“No Cosima it's not.” Delphine pulled out of their embrace and began pacing around the room. “Why are you even still with me? How can you still love me? After all those things I said to you, I was vile. You were just trying to survive, you never wanted to sleep with him, you _had_ to. You tried to explain it to me in the lab and I wouldn't let you. Cosima I won’t- I can't forgive myself for that. ” Delphine hovered near the doorway.

 

Cosima’s tears became heavier, “NO Delphine please don't go. Come here, stay with me please.” 

 

Delphine realized how her body language may have appeared and ran over to Cosima and hugged the woman tight, as though this was the last time she would ever hold her, “of course I’m staying Cosima. I just… I don't deserve you. I can't believe I didn't see it- that something was wrong. Do you hate me?”

 

“No Delphine. If the roles were reversed I would have acted the same way, I swear. The thought of anyone else loving you would have broken me. It’s okay, we’re okay.”

 

Delphine nodded and pressed her forehead against Cosima's, “I will never stop trying to earn your forgiveness.”

 

“You don't need my forgiveness, Delphine. I already told you, there is nothing to forgive, so please stop apologizing okay? You didn't do anything wrong.”

 

“Okay…” Delphine kissed her lover, she was grateful that Cosima was so understanding, they were yin and yang and Cosima balanced her out perfectly. 

 

Cosima pulled away smiling, “you’ve taken it surprisingly well… I thought you would have lost your shit, thrown some stuff around and stormed out or something.”

 

Delphine rubbed Cosima’s back, “I’m okay Cosima because I know that _you're_ going to be okay. If you had something incurable then it would be a different story believe me…”

 

Cosima cupped Delphine’s cheeks, “Delphine, it is incurable, we can't get Dr. Leekie to treat me.”

 

Delphine pulled Cosima up to meet her gaze, “Cosima, I will get you that vaccine and I will make you a cure, I promise.”

 

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep Delphine…” Cosima dropped her head.

 

“Hey look at me- I’m not. You asked me to trust you and I did… now you have to do the same with me okay?”

 

The realization suddenly dawned on Cosima’s face, “no Delphine- please- please don't sleep with him. He’s aggressive, he’ll hurt you-“

 

“Shh it’s okay, I won’t. Unless we get desperate and I have to-“

 

“No Delphine! Not ever!” Cosima snapped. 

 

“I’m not going to watch you die Cosima”, Delphine snapped back, “I’ve only just got you back. You promised me forever and there is no way I’m letting you break your promise. If I have to have sex with him to save you I would do it in a heartbeat. You know that it is meaningless, that you are the only one I ever want to love and be loved by.”

 

Cosima fell forward and sobbed into Delphine's shoulder, “okay”.

 

“When did you last have your shot?”

 

“The day before I met you.”

 

“Hmm okay… so approximately 2 weeks.“

 

“Yeah I should start getting symptoms in like a week.”

 

“What happens if you don't get your shot Cosima… how long?”

 

Cosima looked up at Delphine, “I guess I’d have another few weeks after that, my body has gotten used to the vaccine so it wouldn't do well if I quit cold turkey. Assuming that I don't get another shot, I’d say I had 4 weeks max.”

 

Delphine cried into Cosima’s forehead and kissed it gently, “okay, it won’t come to that, it can’t.”

 

“I know Delphine, but if it does I want you to know-“

 

“DON’T Cosima, don’t you dare start saying your goodbyes to me.” Delphine sobs became louder. 

 

“Okay, okay I’m sorry, I love you.” Cosima stroked Delphine’s golden locks and kissed her softly through her sobs. 

 

Delphine fell back on the bed and pulled Cosima down to lay with her. Both women fell asleep in each other's arms both exhausted from crying. 

 

Cosima woke up, she looked at her alarm to see that it was 12am, she returned her gaze to Delphine. Cosima watched her girlfriends chest rise and fall, she stared at her trying to commit every inch of her to memory, before it was too late and she’d no longer have the chance to. 

 

She noticed the way her nose wrinkled when she was dreaming, the way her legs and arms stretched out across her bed, the freckles on her cheeks, her big dimples and the tiny moles on her arms and neck. _How did I almost miss this? How did I almost miss her?_ Cosima wondered.

 

Nothing would compare to the warmth she felt when she was with Delphine. Even without words, without embracing one another or making love to each other, Delphine radiated a warmth that was unique to only Cosima, she could feel it. For as long as she lived Cosima needed this, whether that be 4 weeks or 70 years, she wanted Delphine, always.

 

Cosima slipped out of bed slowly so she wouldn't wake her sleeping beauty and walked over to her dresser draw. Cosima rummaged around at the bottom of all of her draws until she found what she was looking for. 

 

“Mmm Cosima are you okay?” Cosima heard her sleepy girlfriend call out. 

 

Cosima returned to her bed only to be met by Delphine's tight embrace. Delphine cuddled up to Cosima’s side, “Yeah babe I’m okay, I just…”

 

Sensing Cosima’s hesitation Delphine forced herself to wake up, she looked up at the brunette who was crying still with the biggest grin on her lips. 

 

Delphine sat up, “what’s wrong Cosima? Are you okay?”

 

“No, I’m okay Delphine I swear.”

 

Delphine stroked her girlfriend's cheek, “then why are you crying mon amour?”

 

“They’re happy tears… Delphine, I know you don't want to hear my goodbyes so I won’t say them- but I do need say something okay?”

 

Delphine nodded and gave her love her full attention. 

 

“Okay I’m going to talk and I just need you to listen…" Cosima chuckled, "God, this is harder than I thought it would be.” 

 

 _She’s leaving me._ Delphine though to herself.

 

Cosima laughed as if she could hear Delphine's ridiculous thoughts, “Delphine, our relationship has never been conventional, but were not exactly conventional people you know? You’re a beautiful French goddess, and I’m a geeky Canadian, on paper we would never fit, but somehow we just do…Since the first time I saw you in your DYAD file there was something that drew me to you, like an instant connection you know? And then I met you in person, I could hear you swearing in French on the other side of the door furiously patting your stained blouse and you made me laugh for the first time in forever. And then you opened the door and I saw you, it was like you gave me complete and utter clarity and I knew that I had to be with you, whether it be as a co-worker or a friend or this, God I hoped it would be this, but I just had to know you. I was so late to our first meeting because I was practising a speech I wrote because I didn't want to sound like an idiot in front of you, I didn't follow it though of course, I was lost as soon as I looked at you…And then shit got real between us, within a few days we had already had our fair share of problems, like me running out on you, arguing in the pouring rain and then this whole me being sick and being blackmailed into sleeping with my boss thing to name but a few…” 

 

Cosima looked at Delphine and offered a cheeky smile, “...but hell Delphine, we had some pretty great times too! Like you teaching me French in your house the first time we met, all of our discussions in the labs, our first kiss out in the storm, our first date in that fancy French restaurant and then… the first time we made love… I swear Delphine waking up with you the morning after was the best feeling in the world because I had you there next to me… I mean it was also scary as hell because I knew that I was in deep and so, so, so madly in love with you. The thought of losing you terrified me, that's why I didn't want to tell you about my disease. But I did eventually… sorry it took me so long… and yet you stayed, you're here with me now and I can't believe it. I mean you could have ran and I would have understood but you didn’t.”

 

Delphine was crying heavy by this stage, she took Cosima’s hands in her own and kissed each of her knuckles. 

 

Cosima gazed into Delphine’s eyes and continued, “I know I said I wouldn't say my goodbyes and believe me Delphine I really don't want to. But we need to be realistic, if worst comes to worst and we can’t get the cure, I want you to know that I loved you with every single piece of me. I want to leave you knowing that you knew how much I loved you- I want to spend whatever time I have left showing you how loved you are. And although no amount of time with you will ever be enough Delphine, I’d like to start with the rest of my life; whether that be for 4 more weeks or until we’re both 90 surrounded by our kids and grandkids, I want to wake up with you every morning and tell you how much I love you, because I do Delphine. I love you so much.”

 

Still crying, Cosima reached under her pillow and retrieved a little velvet box that she had just taken out of her dresser just moments ago. 

 

Cosima opened the box to show a beautiful, elegant engagement ring that had belonged to her grandmother, “Delphine Cormier, will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?”

 

Delphine didn't hesitate, not even for a second, “YES!” Delphine screamed and mounted the little brunette forcing them both to fall back onto the bed. Delphine placed harsh kissed all over Cosima’s face letting her sobs fall freely, they were no longer sad tears but ones of love and happiness. 

 

Cosima pulled Delphine to lay on top of her and kissed her deeply, when they both paused to breath Cosima took the ring out of its box and placed it on Delphine’s wedding finger, it was a perfect fit. 

 

Delphine stroked her fiancé's cheek and kissed her softly, “It’s beautiful. And your speech was… I don't even have words to explain how perfect it was- I love you so much. But Cosima we’re going to grow old together d’accord?”

 

“Delphine… we can’t pretend-“

 

Delphine cupped Cosima’s cheeks and gazed at her, “I will not be a widow Cosima do you understand me?” 

 

 _Widow._ The word played on a loop in Cosima’s mind. Was she being selfish in asking the love of her life to marry her knowing full well she may not make it to their honeymoon?

 

Delphine kissed Cosima softly through their tears, “I promised you that I would cure you, and we both promised each other forever and I can’t have forever without you Cosima.”

 

Cosima looked at her fiancé with wide eyes, “Delphine are you sure? Believe me, I want nothing more than to marry you but I need you to understand that I may not be here for much longer- and if you can’t handle being a widow I get it, we don't have to-”

 

“-NON Cosima, that's not what I meant. I just… I don't want to think of a life without you okay? We’re going to get married and move in together and get a puppy and start a family. I’m going to wake up every morning and tell you how grateful I am to call you my wife and how much I love you. And if by some sick tragedy you don’t…if we can't... Cosima I wouldn't regret a single second of our time together, not our fights or the lies or the restless nights- I wouldn't change anything. I would do it all again in a heartbeat.”

 

Cosima blushed and kissed the blonde, “Okay… and I love you too Frenchie.”

 

Both women fell back and cuddled up to one another and let themselves fall into a deep sleep. The next few weeks would surely be the hardest of either women’s life but now was no time to think about that. 

 

They were engaged to be married and surely love will conquer all, it has to. Right?

 


	10. Gods And Monsters

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the next installment of this labor of love I hope you enjoy!
> 
> Thank you all for your comments, prompts, and kudos- you are all incredible! :)
> 
> Chapter Song- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z_zmrdilJFU (explict)

Delphine awoke with her fiancé still wrapped up I'm her arms. _I’m going to marry her. She’s going to be my wife. I’m going to wake up with her in my arms every morning._ Delphine repeated over and over, like a mantra, the idea of being legally bound to her lover had suddenly become such a source of comfort for the blonde. 

 

Today Delphine would return to work, with Cosima still technically having a few weeks to rest, although knowing the brunette she would return to work in a day or two. Today would be the first time she saw Dr. Leekie since it happened and she knew what she had to do. 

 

Delphine looked down at the brunette, “Mon amour” Delphine cooed.

 

“Mhmmm yes wife to be” Cosima rolled over to face her lover.

 

Delphine felt the biggest grin fall across her lips, “I have to go to work but my phone is in my pocket on the loudest volume possible, as is all of the boys. If you need _anything_ you just call me okay?”

 

Cosima smiled into a kiss “ _Anything_?”

 

Delphine pulled away and hovered at Cosima's lips, “well… non, during the day you call me if you're feeling unwell and tonight I will give you _anything_  else you may need.” Delphine kissed the brunette once more before slipping out of bed and heading into the bathroom. 

 

Delphine got herself ready quickly as her morning cuddles with Cosima had already put her behind schedule. She placed her engagement ring on a silver chain and wore it around her neck tucking it into her blouse, she knew she couldn't announce their news but she was also not willing to be without Cosima’s promise of forever, this was a solid compromise. Delphine retreated to the bedroom to kiss her love goodbye before Paul arrived to take her to work. 

 

Delphine leaned down and placed a soft kiss on Cosima’s sleepy lips. 

 

“Delphine, do you have to go? Can't you just take one day off with me?” Cosima murmured. 

 

Delphine climbed into bed and pulled the brunette onto her chest, “Oui mon amour I have to go, I haven't been there in over a week.”

 

“Huh?” Cosima asked confused.

 

Delphine chuckled “You think that I just happened to be there the exact moment you woke up from your coma? Non, I stayed with you every day since it happened until you were awake.”

 

Cosima grinned into Delphine chest, “Really? I know you’re probably going to get tired of hearing me say this but I love you.”

 

“I love you too. Now I really have to go, Paul must be downstairs by now.” Delphine pulled away and started to walk towards the door. 

 

Cosima sat up, “Babe…”

 

“Oui?”

 

“Don’t… I don’t want you to talk to Leekie about any of this okay? Not about my treatment or him nearly killing me and especially not about our engagement. Delphine, he would… if he knew about you and I he would…”

 

Delphine sat on the edge of the bed and rubbed the brunette's arm, “Cosima, it’s okay I can take care of myself… and I’m trying to take care of you too.”

 

“No Delphine listen to me-“

 

“Non, Cosima- we don't have time- I’m going to keep my promise, just trust me.”

 

Before Cosima could respond Delphine placed a quick kiss on her lips and quickly left to meet Paul. 

 

Once in the car, Delphine was greeted by a bright smile and breakfast. _This man is a God sent._

 

“Morning Delphine here is your coffee and I bought you a croissant… NOT because you're French I swear! I’m not trying to be presumptions it’s just who doesn’t like croissants right?”

 

Delphine smiled at her friend, “Oui I love them, merci Paul!”

 

The ride to work was again uneventful until Paul pulled up outside the institute. Delphine was exiting the car when Paul gently tugged on her arm and encouraged her to stay put.

 

“Paul, what’s wrong?” Delphine asked nervously. 

 

“Listen, Delphine, as well as being your driver I’m supposed to be your… assistant, I guess. And one of my jobs is to pass on anything that you need to know…”

 

“Okay, Paul what do I need to know?”

 

Paul sighed, “Firstly, Delphine… speaking as your friend and not as your co-worker… I just want to say that I’m so sorry about Cosima. What he did to her was unforgivable and believe me, Delphine I wanted to kill him for what he did to her, Cosima has always been such a good friend to me and I…”

 

“It’s okay Paul, she’ll be okay,” Delphine placed her hand on his shoulder.

 

“Delphine, Cosima told me.”

 

“I’m sorry, she told you about what?” _There is literally a million and one things she could have told him that he would feel the need to mention._

 

“She called me this morning, I’m guessing you were getting ready or something. She told me about you two and… I think it's great. Honestly, Delphine, Cosima hasn't been this happy in years… since she started receiving treatment from Leekie.”

 

“Wait you know about that too? You know she’s sick… I didn't even- until…”

 

“Yeah only me and Scott know… before I was your driver I was hers and we became close friends. I had to hang around for her until early hours of the morning until she was done with _him_. I mean we still are friends… which is why she called me and asked me to keep an eye on you.”

 

“She… she never told me that you two were friends.”

 

“Yeah well, Dr. Leekie forced her to stop talking to me. I guess he was intimidated you know… even though she’s… anyway, we’re still close, we just have to keep it quiet. Delphine listen to me, you're important to a lot of people here, like me and the guys and Cosima, just don't be reckless okay? Please, you've seen what he’s capable of- but like I said it’s my job to pass on information you need to know… he told me to tell you that he wants to see you in his office this evening after work, but if your not-”

 

“-Okay Paul, I’ll be fine don’t worry” Delphine interrupted. 

 

Delphine got out of the car quickly and darted towards the entrance. _How could I not know that Cosima was close to Paul? Why did she tell Paul to keep an eye on me? What did she think I was going to do?_

 

The day passed unbearably slow. Delphine often text Cosima to check that she was still okay, despite Cosima insisting she needed kisses and cuddles stat, Delphine resisted her urge to run home knowing she still had to meet with Dr. Leekie. She told Cosima that she would be late home, she told Cosima that Paul had invited her for a drink after work which considering their newly discovered friendship, she was sure Cosima wouldn't mind. 

 

Delphine couldn't help but chuckle each time she saw one of Cosima’s ridiculous texts and eventually instead of text messages Cosima resorted to messaging Delphine pictures of them both that she had taken since they met. There was a group picture of the team on Delphine’s first day, various selfies of the pair Cosima had taken whilst they should have been working, one of the pair on the first night they spent together on Delphine’s couch drinking their coffee, one of them cuddling at the look out point on their first date, one of them naked and wrapped around each other under the covers in bed after their first night together and countless other’s Cosima had snapped in between. Delphine never understood why Cosima wanted to take so many pictures of the two until she finally did. Cosima was convinced she was living on borrowed time, she knew there was a very real possibility that she could die soon, she had accepted that she didn't have long left and in Cosima’s mind, each photo was a memory solidifying how blissfully happy she was in each still, how happy she was with Delphine. 

 

Delphine caught her eyes welling up but she willed herself not to cry anymore, she told herself that she would not cry over something that she was adamant on fixing, that they would be wasted tears because soon all of this heartache would be a nothing but a distant memory. 

 

“Delphine are you okay?” Delphine turned around to see Scott sitting on the stool next to her. 

 

“Oui Scott, I’m just looking at some photo’s Cosima sent me, see…” Delphine showed Scott all of the pictures, watching him blush furiously at the picture of the two in bed. 

 

Scott chuckled at their various goofy selfies and smiled sincerely at the more serious ones, “she looks so happy…”

 

“She is… we both are” Delphine offered a sad smile to her friend. 

 

“Yeah totally I get it I just meant that… I mean you weren't here Delphine and I honestly don't envy you for that” Scott countered. 

 

“What do you mean?” Delphine asked confused.

 

“I just mean, a few months ago she was insufferable. Her… sessions… with Dr. Leekie were really starting to take their toll. She was moody, always. She stopped eating or sleeping… part of me thinks that she just wanted to disappear, for it to be over. Despite mine and Pauls best efforts, I think she could have just slipped away easily.”

 

Delphine nodded sympathetically, “I’m sorry Scott, that must have been hard to watch.”

 

“Yeah it was, but then she received your file and I swear to god I saw something in her I hadn't seen in forever. I saw hope, drive, optimism, it’s like you gave her a new lease on life you know?”

 

“Oui, I know the feeling.”

 

Scott looked at her and smiled, Delphine knew he understood, “Yeah I guess you do huh?”

 

“Yes, I do.”

 

Scott grabbed her hand and squeezed it as he pulled away to stand up and return to his work.

 

“Wait, Scott…”

 

Scott returned to his seat next to Delphine.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“I… me and Cosima…it’s just that we’re…”

 

“Are you both okay?” Scott asked worriedly.

 

“Yes! Yes, we’re better than okay…” Delphine felt a wide grin fall on her lips as she turned her whole body to face Scott, he mirrored her actions, “… can I tell you a secret that you can’t tell anyone, at least not yet?”

 

“Of course.”

 

“Me and Cosima… Cosima and I… we’re getting married,” Delphine grinned.

 

In one quick energetic motion, Scott leaped forward towards Delphine as he picked her up and swung her around in circles knocking over the stools around them.

 

“ARE YOU FOR REAL?” Scott squealed, his voice uncharacteristically high.

 

“YES!” Delphine beamed. 

 

“I’M SO HAPY FOR YOU BOTH!” Scott had never grinned so wide.

 

“Okay! Okay, put me down, Scott!” Delphine chuckled. 

 

Scott obliged and the pair took their seats once more, facing each other. 

 

“Listen, Scott, the reason I told you is because… I was wondering if… I mean it’s not exactly conventional but… would you be my best man or man of honor… or… basically what I’m asking is if you walk me down the aisle and be at my side when I marry her? You’re the closest thing I have to a brother, to family here, and well I guess you practically are… so will you?”

 

Scott felt a tear roll down his cheek, his smile unrelenting, “Delphine Cormier I would be delighted to walk you down the aisle stand at your side when you marry Cosima.”

 

Delphine smiled gently, “Thank you, Scott.”

 

“The pleasure is all mine, I told you I love you and I meant it- in this world, we don't often get to pick our family but I guess you and I are the lucky ones because we do Delphine and I would pick you and the rest of this team in a second.”

 

Delphine smiled and blushed, “me too.”

 

Scott hugged Delphine tightly in a bear hug until he finally released her and returned to his work. 

 

By the end of their _sibling bonding time_ , it was time to meet with Dr. Leekie. Delphine suddenly wasn't so afraid anymore, nothing could ruin her current state of pure happiness. 

 

The boys had left, despite their eagerness to walk Delphine outside, she instead she was just going to hang around until Paul arrived. 

 

As soon as they left she made her way to the elevator to take the long ride up to the top floor where no doubt Dr. Leekie would be awaiting her arrival and she knew _exactly_ what she was going to say. 

 


	11. If I Lose Myself

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot is going to happen very quickly so be prepared ;)
> 
> Thanks for all of the love and comments- I wouldn't have been able to continue this without you all!
> 
> Chapter song:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0uSeVpFhRw4
> 
> WANING: DESCRIPTIONS OF CONFRONTATION.

When Delphine finally reached Dr. Leekie’s office door she knocked gently waiting for a response, the building was virtually empty with everyone having already left to go home. 

 

 

The door swung open, “Ah Delphine I'm so glad to see that Paul passed on my message.”

 

He gestured for her to enter his office and take a seat on his sofa that sat in the middle of the room, she obliged not willing to rock the boat and he joined her. _Think of Cosima, this is for her, don't aggravate him, Delphine._

 

“Dr. Leekie I-“ Delphine began.

 

“Please Delphine call me Aldous, I think we’re beyond all the bounds formality now, wouldn't you agree?” Aldous smiled at her.

 

 _I swear to God, I am going to punch that fucking grin off of his face._ Delphine thought.

 

“Very well, Aldous, I think it’s time we admitted what this is really about.”

 

“Finally, someone who gets straight to the point I like it.”

 

“I know about Cosima, about her auto-immune disease.”

 

He looked at Delphine with a sly grin knowing full well what her implications were, “Yes… your point being?”

 

“My point is, you need to continue treating her.”

 

“Is that so?” Aldous stood up and went over to his desk to pour a glass of whiskey for them both, “Oh Delphine, I don’t think that I do.”

 

Delphine felt a spike of anger begin in the pit of her stomach, “You owe her that much after what you did!” _Breathe Delphine, breathe._

 

Aldous returned to the couch and handed Delphine her drink, “No Delphine, you're mistaken. I didn’t do anything, Cosima’s injuries were a direct result of her own choices.”

 

“Her choice? What choice Aldous? She never had a choice!” _Breathe._

 

“Of course she did, we _all_ have choices to make. She chose not to pleasure me, not to give herself to me and therefore she sealed her own fate.”

 

“That is not a choice she should have had to make! Sleep with you or die. What kind of sick ultimatum is that?”

 

“It is one which she happily made for over two years. We were fine before you arrived!”

 

Delphine stood up, placing the whiskey on the desk with a loud thud, she began pacing around his office, “Fine? You think that forcing someone to have sex with you just so they can live is fine?”

 

“I never heard her complain, in fact, Delphine she loved it when I fucked her…”

 

“You have no idea how she felt! You backed her into a corner and held her life for ransom! Of course, she slept with you, she didn't want to die!”

 

“I never held her life for ransom, don't be so dramatic. It was merely a business deal if you will, a contract that left both of us satisfied.”

 

Delphine clenched her fists as she felt the rage inside her grow, “is that what you think? You think that you're an admirable man because she was benefiting from your perverted advances?”

 

With a calm tone and a stoic expression, Aldous countered, “jealousy is not a nice quality in you Delphine. Don’t be upset just because I can pleasure her more than you can. I had her all to myself for two years, a hell of a lot longer than you have, you think that her feelings for me will just dissipate after such a long time together?”

 

Delphine scoffed, “is that what you think? You think I’m here pleading for her life out of jealousy?” 

 

“Of course, what else?”

 

“Love! Love Aldous!” Delphine yelped. 

 

Aldous laughed, “Don’t be naive Delphine, you’ve known her for what a few weeks?”

 

“Don't patronize me! What does that matter? Love is love and I need her Aldous- I need her to be okay so whatever you want, whatever you need me to do in order to continue her shots I will do it.”

 

Aldous stood up slowly and walked towards Delphine until they were practically pressed up against each other, he looked down at her, “What would you be willing to do Delphine?”

 

Delphine gulped audibly returning his unwanted gaze, “anything”.

 

“Well well well, how the mighty have fallen.”

 

“Excusez-moi?” Delphine always resorted to her native tongue when she was angry. 

 

“Please Delphine get over yourself- I'm a respectable man, I have high standards that you do certainly not meet. You must think so highly of yourself, you must think you're so perfect because Cosima chose you over me, over her own life.”

 

“No that is never what I wanted Aldous! I never knew she was sick!”

 

“How are you going to live with yourself, Delphine? Knowing that you killed her?”

 

Silence. 

 

“Knowing that you killed someone who loved you so fiercely and gave up everything for you? Do you really think that you could handle the guilt?”

 

Delphine felt her tears roll down her cheek, “Aldous please-“

 

“No Delphine. I will watch Cosima die and I will do so with pleasure knowing that it is going to destroy you.”

 

Delphine shook her head, “you couldn't Aldous.”

 

“What makes you so sure Delphine?”

 

Delphine sighed trying to catch her breath, “because, despite all of your sick games, I know you love her. I know that you can understand the fear I feel every second of every day knowing that she is slowly dying.”

 

Aldous exhaled, “I am not as sentimental as you Delphine, please do not kid yourself.”

 

“Even so, you won't let her die. She is too valuable to DYAD, her work it will make you rich and famous and we’re close Aldous, we nearly have a treatment for the disease you have us working on.”

 

“Hm, interesting, you do make a good point.”

 

“So treat her, let her finish her work,” Delphine pleaded calmly. 

 

“Okay, I will treat her until she finishes her work, on two conditions.”

 

“What are these conditions?” Delphine asked hesitantly.

 

“You will break up with Cosima and come and work alongside me.”

 

Delphine voice cracked, “I will do no such thing! How dare-“

 

“She will die Delphine. In a few weeks, she will be dead unless you do as I say.”

 

“No please- don't make me Aldous, I will do anything else, just please don't make me leave her not like this.”

 

“That’s my offer, Delphine. Take it or leave it.”

 

In that second Delphine grabbed her engagement ring under her shirt, she felt breathless, she couldn't leave Cosima, not now. 

 

_It will be okay, we can stage a break-up like Cosima and Paul did- it will be okay._

 

“Okay Aldous, I will come and work with you, I will leave her, but you will treat her. For as long as I follow your conditions you will treat her.”

 

“Okay, Delphine. It’s a deal. But before you think you can fool me, I can assure you that you cannot. Your technological communications will be monitored, you will be watched Delphine, don't forget I have powerful friends in powerful places, there is no way to get around this understood?”

 

_No. No, I do not understand. I do not understand a life without her. But she will die. I would rather her hate me for the rest of my miserable life than allow her to die. I made a promise to get her those shots under any circumstances- I just never imagined it would be this hard._

 

“Okay.”

 

“Good. And you will tell her that you're breaking up with her because she is sick.”

 

Delphine’s voice was flat, her mouth dry, her heart racing despite not being able to feel it pumping at all, “why Aldous? Why are you being so cruel? Why can’t I just tell her the real reason, that I’m breaking up with her so she can receive her treatments?”

 

“Because like I said actions have consequences. Cosima already received her punishment, this is yours for taking what's mine. I want you to break her heart and see the pain you’ve caused her.”

 

Delphine cried outwardly, she didn't care about looking weak in front of Aldous. How did this happen? Less than 24 hours ago she was the happiest she's ever been. Cosima had woken up and was healthy and she had gotten engaged and now this. Now _this_.

 

“Okay,” Delphine turned to leave.

 

“Don’t forget Delphine, I will know if you’re with her when you shouldn't be.”

 

Delphine left. Before she knew it she walked out of DYAD feeling the winter chill hit her like a hurricane. 

 

Paul saw she was distressed. He ran out of the car and put his coat around her and ushered her into the car. 

 

“Are you okay?” Paul asked quickly, “Delphine did he hurt you?”

 

Delphine screamed, “YES!… No I mean no- not physically. Paul… he's making me… I have to break up with her.”

 

“Delphine I’m- I don't know what to say. She will be okay Delphine, she’s not stupid she’ll understand.”

 

“No Paul she won’t! Leekie is making me say that I'm breaking up with her because she’s sick! I would never-”

 

“That bastard!”

 

“Please just take me to her house. I just- I need to get this over with before I can’t bring myself to do it anymore.” _Just rip it off like an old dirty band aid right?_

 

Once they arrived outside of Cosima’s house, Delphine got out of the car and began walking towards Cosima’s front door. She knocked knowing the brunette would be ready to embrace her with welcoming arms. 

 

Cosima swung open her front door, her grin in its usual place, Delphine took one look at her fiancé and broke down. She fell on the floor and Cosima was quick to fall to her side.

 

“Babe! Delphine look at me what is it? What happened? Are you okay?” Cosima asked examining the blonde.

 

“I love you.” Delphine cried and clung onto Cosima as though it was the last time.

 

“Shh I love you too Delphine it’s okay what's wrong?”

 

“I need you to know I love you. That will never change okay Cosima?”

 

“Okay, let’s get you inside.”

 

Cosima pulled Delphine to her feet and helped her inside. 

 

_Forget about loving me forever, she’s going to hate me forever and I can’t blame her. She never asked for any of this, but I’ll be damned if my need to have her- to love her- is going to stop her receiving treatment. She will not die because I was too selfish to let her go, she will live and she will have a full life- it will just be without me._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry! I don't know why I always insist on Cophine drama- no more after this chapter/ next chapter I promise <3


	12. Save Yourself

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so thankful to everyone who still reads this and leaves me kudos and comments <3 
> 
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HUdeW3rT8-Q

Cosima pulled Delphine onto the couch and just held her tight until she caught her breath. 

 

After what felt like a small eternity, Cosima eventually pulled away and looked at the blonde, “Delphine what is it?”

 

Delphine looked at Cosima and cupped her cheeks, her eyes red and her breath labored, “I love you… but I can’t do this Cosima.”

 

"What do you mean you can't do  _this_? What part exactly? If I pushed you too hard with the marriage proposal I’m really sorry I-”

 

Delphine felt a lump in her throat it was now or never, “any- all of this Cosima. I can’t do this,  _us_.”

 

Cosima shook her head in disbelief, “what? why?”

 

“I… I cant be with someone who is sick.”

 

Cosima gently shook Delphine by her shoulders to meet her gaze, “Delphine, talk to me this isn't you! What happened when you was out with Paul?”

 

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”

 

“Delphine! Stop lying! It’s me. Talk to me please!”

 

“I…” Delphine put her head in  her hands.

 

Cosima pulled away from Delphine and stood a couple of feet away from her unable to gauge whether the blonde truly meant the words escaping her mouth, “you what? What Delphine? Because we’re engaged! We’re getting married.”

 

Delphine looked at the brunette, “I never meant to lead you on, I’m sorry.”

 

“STOP SAYING SORRY!” Cosima screamed.

 

Delphine dropped her head further, “I don’t know what else you want me to say?”

 

“I want you to tell me what the fuck happened between this morning and now!”

 

“Nothing I just-“

 

Cosima was frantic, her hands flying everywhere, “so you just lead me on this whole time? You let me believe that you weren't going to leave me only to do this? You gave me false hope that I could make my last few weeks alive meaningful and you let me believe that I could leave this world finally being loved by someone who I loved so deeply in return.”

 

Delphine felt her tears fall onto her blouse, “yes.”

 

Cosima scoffed, “I don’t believe that you would be that cruel Delphine- did someone say something to you?”

 

“No Cosima- it’s like you said I just… I don’t want … I can't be a widow.”

 

Cosima brought her hand to her forehead, “whatever happened to ‘you’re not going to die Cosima’?”

 

“I was naive to think that- I didn't want to believe it but reality caught up to me.”

 

“You promised me, Delphine … I’m so stupid.”

 

Delphine bit her lip so hard it drew blood, “I was living in a fantasy Cosima- it’s not practical.”

 

“Not practical? Fuck you Delphine! I’m sorry my disease is such an inconvenience for you!”

 

Delphine squeezed her eyes closed and prayed that this was all a nightmare, she hoped she would awake in the brunette's arms but of course, she knew better, “I… I should go.”

 

Cosima wrapped her arms around herself sobbing to herself, “you’re such a good liar do you know that?”

 

“I'm so sorry Cosima” Delphine cried softly, how could Cosima believe her so easily? How could she think that her feelings towards her were anything less than genuine?'

 

“Get out!” Cosima screamed and pointed towards her door.

 

Delphine left quickly and broke down as soon as she passed the threshold of her own home, it felt so empty without the brunette there with her. 

 

Delphine walked aimlessly up to her bedroom, she changed into a pair of Cosima’s pyjamas that had previously been forgotten there and climbed into bed. 

 

Delphine screamed as loud as she could into her pillow letting it become soaked with her tears, she felt her body spasm and quake with despondency. She let out all of the hurt and regret. Equally, she felt as though she had no right to be upset she was the one who had broken up with Cosima after all. 

 

Although she knew that she had made the right decision, Cosima would live because she had left her but knowing this didn't make her decision any easier. There would be no closure for Delphine, she knew she could never be honest with Cosima about the nature of her decisions, she would forever be stuck unable to move on to a life beyond her.

 

Delphine had finally cried herself to sleep, overcome with exhaustion. 

 

Later that night, she was awoken when there was a knock at her door. She ignored it until it became loud and persistent. She thought it may have been Aldous coming to congratulate her on a job well done or Paul coming back to check on her. 

 

Delphine begrudgingly left her bed and walked downstairs. She opened the door to see Cosima standing there, which was most definitely the last person she expected to see at her doorstep.

 

“I spoke to Paul, he told me everything,” Cosima panted.

 

Delphine was still half asleep, “what? Cos-“ 

 

Cosima pushed forward and pulled Delphine into a deep kiss, holding onto the blonde for dear life. Delphine pulled Cosima into her house and shut the door behind them.

 

Delphine pulled away softly and was now most definitely awake, “Cosima, we can’t.”

 

“Why? Why didn't you just tell me that you saw Leekie rather than letting me believe that you were leaving me by choice?”

 

Delphine blinked away her tears, “I am leaving you by choice, I’m choosing not to be with you anymore Cosima.”

 

“Stop pretending Delphine- it’s okay you’re safe here with me. I will not let you just abandon me out of some sense of obligation or responsibility do you understand me?” Cosima stepped forward and stroked Delphine’s cheek.

 

Delphine sniffled, “he said I had to break up with you, he said I had to say it was because you was sick as my punishment for taking you away from him, he wanted me to hurt you. He said he would know if I told you otherwise and I couldn't risk you not reviving your shot Cosima.”

 

“Delphine I should have known.”

 

“Non, it’s okay. But Cosima you will get those shots and in order for that to happen we can’t do this, do you understand? We cannot be together.”

 

“No Delphine, Jesus! I have been both with you and without you and I will not be without you again do you understand me? What is it with us? Why can't we just be like any other normal couple?”

 

“Because, we are not a normal couple, clearly. We can’t pretend that we are either because you will die Cosima and it will be my fault,” Delphine held onto the brunette tighter. 

 

Cosima pushed Delphine’s hair out of her face, “no Delphine! It won't be!”

 

Delphine pulled away suddenly realizing how close her and Cosima were, “YES it will! You won't be here anymore Cosima! I will have to be here without you! Imagine if the roles were reversed, would you ask me to do what you're asking of me now? Would you stay with me if I asked you to knowing that it will lead to my death?”

 

Cosima stepped towards Delphine and wrapped her hands around her neck, “Delphine there are ways to get around this like Paul and I have-”

 

Delphine took a step back, “no we can't, Leekie said he's motoring my communications and he said he’ll know if we’re with each other when we shouldn't be. I’m keeping my promise to get you those shots Cosima- whatever it takes. And if this is what has to happen for you to live than I am doing it.”

 

“No, we just have to stage it- act like we’re not together and not text or call each other. We will be okay Delphine please tell me that you believe that.”

 

“I…No what if he finds out?”

 

“He won’t, my monthly appointment is tomorrow okay? We just need to make it until tomorrow and then we can figure out where to go from there alright?”

 

Cosima grabbed Delphine hands into her own.

 

“Cosima, you’re impossible do you know that?”

 

“Yes, I know. But I don't want this Delphine, any of it if it means I can’t live a life with you. What is the point of living if I’m not happy?”

 

“The point is you would be alive Cosima! I will not ask you to give up your life for me.”

 

“Delphine you’re not asking me too- I will die one day, whether it's soon or far into the future and I’ll be damned if it's not by your side!”

 

“Non Cosima- how can you expect me to watch you die knowing that I could have prevented it?”

 

“Because you can't prevent it Delphine! Listen to me. I’m sick, you can't prevent my illness- sure you can prolong my treatment but what kind of life is that answer me honestly? I don't want to be Leekie’s slave, I’ve been at his beck and call for over two years and I’m tired, I’m exhausted… I’m tired of pretending that surviving is enough because it’s not- I don't want to spend the rest of my days alive wondering what would have happened if I would have stayed with you. I want to actually try to live a life that makes me truly happy, with you, rather than just living day to day tiptoeing around like I’m a fragile object that could shatter at any minute.”

 

“But you can have a long and happy life Cosima. You will get over me, you will. And you can meet someone else and have a family and grow old with them.”

 

“But it wouldn't be with you.”

 

Cosima embraced Delphine and placed her hand over her engagement ring around her neck, “I love you, Delphine Cormier. I don't want anyone else. I would rather spend 4 weeks with you than 70 years with someone else. We will make it through this and we will do it together.”

 

Delphine caved, she knew that denying Cosima anymore was a pointless effort-  _How can I deny her this? How can I deny her my love when I know that no one else will ever be able to love her enough?_ , “you need to be sure Cosima, you need to know what you’re potentially giving up.”

 

“Yeah I know- but have you ever stopped to consider what I’m gaining?”

 

“I’m not worth it Cosima, I’m not worth your life, I will  _never_  be worth your life.”

 

“Maybe not… but you are most defiantly worth  _our_  life. The life that I plan on giving you Delphine- it’s going to be incredible I swear. You just have to hang on until tomorrow okay? Tomorrow after I get my shot the clock will reset, I’ll have another 2 months maximum to figure this out.”

 

“What if he doesn’t give you your shot, what then?”

 

“Then we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.”

 

Cosima kissed Delphine softly and she held her tight, “okay Miss soon to be Mrs Cosima Cormier.”

 

Cosima released a high-pitched squeal, “so you still want to marry me then?”

 

Delphine chuckled, “what is it you always say… obvs?”

 

Cosima beamed at the blonde, “oui.”

 

Delphine stroked Cosima’s cheek, “we just have to be careful okay, no mistakes. I’ll work on Leekie, I’m not going to stop until I get my hands on that shot. But you have to go now and look upset just in case Leekie has someone watching us.”

 

“Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow in the lab.”

 

“Actually you won’t… Leekie is forcing me to work with him now, that was part 2 of his conditions to treat you.”

 

Cosima sighed, “I fucking hate him, Delphine.”

 

“I know mon amour, I do too. But you’ll get your shot tomorrow and we will deal with him when we know that you're okay.” 

 

Cosima kissed Delphine, “okay, I love you.”

 

“I love you too.”

 

Cosima raised an eyebrow, “Really?”

 

Delphine pulled Cosima’s cheeks up to reach her gaze, “Cosima, all of those things I said in your house I said because I needed you to hate me- I needed to give you a chance to move on and accept a life without me so that you could get your shots- I didn't mean any of it. Trust me, my love, it hurt a lot more to say them than it did to hear them.”

 

“I know it did, we will be okay Delphine.”

 

Cosima kissed Delphine passionately and then turned around and walked back towards her own house pretending to wipe nonexistent tears from her eyes. Delphine chuckled at how cheeky her fiancé could be.

 

She knew the truth, everything was out in the open. There was no more lies or secrets- they could build upon their relationship with a solid foundation. Both women just hoped that Leekie would hold up his end of their deal.

 


	13. Six Degrees of Separation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for your continued support <3 
> 
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FCT6Mu-pOeE

Today was make or break in the most literal sense of the word. It was either going to be the day that Cosima received her shot was allowed to live or it would be the day that Leekie refused to treat her and sealed her fate as a dead woman walking. Knowing Aldous, Delphine feared it would be the latter.

 

Delphine got ready for work, all be it reluctantly, knowing that today she would spend her day in close quarters with Aldous, and not Cosima as she had hoped.

 

When Delphine arrived at DYAD she sauntered into the elevator and made her way to the top floor. When Delphine arrived she was directed to wait in Leekie’s office for his arrival by his _very_ young, _very_ beautiful receptionist. Once inside Delphine waited for Leekie to arrive and assign her to her new duties. 

 

Aldous glided into his office with a sense of entitlement and self-righteousness, “Good morning Delphine, I’m glad to see you here.”

 

 _Did I have a choice?_ “Oui, I’m here”

 

“Now, your main objective today is to administer Cosima with her monthly vaccine, understood?”

 

“Quoi? I mean I’m sorry?”

 

“You heard me, you pleaded so fiercely for Cosima’s vaccine who better to give it to her than you?”

 

 _Merde, he's going to see straight through us!_ "Non, Aldous. I think you should stick to your usual routine. Allow me to observe please?"

 

"No Delphine, I hope you're not trying to undermine me?"

 

“Aldous, she will not accept my help- she hates me.”

 

“Exactly… for your sake, you had better hope she allows you to treat her Delphine.”

 

As if on queue Cosima entered the office and was met with Delphine’s small disarming smile. Aldous turned from his desk to face the brunette and smiled with his usual narcissistic grin.

 

“Ah, Miss Niehaus how are we today?”

 

Cosima cocked her head and gave her best _‘fuck you’_ smile, “fan-fucking-tanstic Aldous, how about yourself?”

 

Delphine caught Cosima’s eyes, she begged her not to fight him, she prayed she would let go of her pride in favor of her survival. Whilst the two were exchanging not-so-pleasant pleasantries, she took this opportunity to carefully grab an empty syringe from the waste material bin and slip it into the pocket of her lab coat.

 

“I’m also feeling rather chipper today Cosima thank you for asking.”

 

“Mhm great, so can you just shoot me up already, I have work to get back to?”

 

“Actually, Dr. Cormier will be giving you your shot today.”

 

Cosima scoffed, “I’m sorry I think I misheard you.”

 

“Oh no, Cosima I can assure you, you did not.”

 

Cosima remained silent and instead gave Delphine a look of disgust, acting exactly how Aldous wanted her to.

 

Aldous smirked, “oh come on Cosima we’re all adults here, there's no need to act so childish.” 

 

Aldous readied the syringe, letting his free hand fall far too low on Delphine’s back for Cosima’s liking.

 

Cosima gritted her teeth, “yeah, of course, Aldous, far be it for me to act childish. I’m only 30 or so years your junior anyhow, but of course, you’re right.”

 

Aldous sniggered, “Come on now Cosima, you know that my maturity and level of expertise in a certain area of physical activity has always been your favorite quality about me.”

 

“Oh Aldous you know what they say, the older the man the more tired his equipment is.”

 

“Ouch Cosima, I’m sure that would hurt a lot more if I hadn't witnessed your enthusiasm for my… equipment first hand, over and over again.”

 

Delphine cleared her throat, “Aldous the syringe please?”

 

Delphine walked towards Cosima and rolled up the sleeve of her lab coat, gently squeezing her bicep as both a warning to behave and a sign of endearment. Of course, both women remained distant stealing lightening quick reassuring glances, but when Cosima saw the outline of Delphine ring pierce through her shirt she could help but grin internally. 

 

With Cosima sitting on the desk in front of her, obstructing Leekie’s view, Delphine discretely slipped the discarded syringe into Cosima’s lab coat pocket and grabbed its empty replacement waiting for her in her own pocket. Delphine breathed a sigh of relief, of course Leekie wouldn't expect to be betrayed so openly, it was the perfect plan really. And with the two of them working together it was so much easier, of course, Cosima could have never done this by herself Aldous was always with her. Delphine watched Cosima’s brows furrow in confusion and relief, all she could do was offer her a wink in return.

 

A few moments later, Delphine exhaled in tandem with Cosima, “bon, done”.

 

“Good, now Delphine please may I have the syringe.”

 

“Of course, here” Delphine handed Aldous the syringe and saw him discard of it in his locked disposal bin.

 

“You’re free to go Cosima, Delphine and I have some… business that needs attending to I’m sure you understand”.

 

Delphine blinked, mouth agape. _Shit!_ _Don’t Cosima, don’t react, he’s only trying to provoke you. I wouldn’t._

 

Cosima trusted Delphine implicitly, she jumped down from the desk, “yeah toats have fun with that.”

 

Aldous followed the brunette as she walked towards the door, “oh you don’t mind that Delphine and I are working so closely together now?”

 

Cosima bit her cheeks hard, “c’mon Aldous what do you want me to say? I mean yeah I was pissed at first but then Madame Cormier was a total heartless bitch to me and to be honest Aldous I’ve always hated you. So I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m indifferent to both of you… You kinda make the perfect couple really, you’ve got this whole devil/ succubus thing going on… I’m just glad you found a new play toy to have fun with that isn't me. I guess I’ll see you both next month”. Cosima turned her angry gaze to the blonde, “enjoy yourself, Delphine.” 

 

Aldous laughed, rather loudly, “indeed Cosima see you next month.”

 

Cosima stared Delphine down until Delphine broke their gaze and Cosima retreated to the exit.

 

Aldous turned to Delphine once the brunette was gone, “Wow Delphine I’m impressed.”

 

“Did you really have to provoke her like that Aldous? I only broke up with her yesterday!”

 

“Of course, I’m a man who enjoys the more simple pleasures in life.”

 

“Pleasure such as hurting other people?” _Sadistic fuck._

 

“Well, yes. But I must say I am impressed, I could quite literally feel her hatred towards you, it was radiating off of her. Her jaw was gritted, her fists clenched and her eyes, they read both betrayal and unrequited love. You were right- this is far more fun than letting her die.”

 

 _It isn't unrequited._ Delphine let her gaze fall to the floor, “is she going to be alright?”

 

“Yes, Delphine I am nothing if not a man of my word. Cosima got her usual shot and will continue to receive it so long as you adhere to my conditions.”

 

Delphine mumbled, “thank you, Aldous.” _Better to stay in his good graces._

 

“Of course.”

 

Delphine could breathe easy, as Cosima had said, the clock has reset, she was okay, for now at least.

 

Delphine had gotten a sample of the shot, she was sure that Cosima would know what to do with it. Cosima would find her cure.

 


	14. In For The Kill

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is another chapter for you to indulge in.
> 
> As always thank you for your comments and kudos- they are greatly appreciated.
> 
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=138AnFonZMg

The rest of Delphine’s first day working for Aldous passed in a haze. In essence, she was his glorified trophy- there to be seen and objectified by his senior colleagues, not to be heard for the genius she was. Aldous had her run tedious admin tasks and analyze her predecessor's results which she knew Aldous had done to make her feel insignificant- and for the most part, Delphine hated herself for believing that she was. 

 

As the day drew to a close, Delphine left as soon as humanly possible, muttering a quick goodbye to Aldous as she was already halfway out of the door. Refusing to give this man another second of her time than was necessary. 

 

After work Paul picked Delphine up and they spoke in depth about their hatred for their boss. Somehow despite all the injustices against him by Aldous, Paul still managed to joke about _‘_ creepy Leekie _’_ as they now referred to him. He convinced Delphine that in the grand scheme of everything he was seemingly unimportant, just a temporary inconvenience, and that he was to be pitied not hated- _although she most defiantly still hated him_. 

 

Delphine was laughing so hard at Paul’s jokes about Aldous that she nearly missed him drive straight past the DYAD housing complex. 

 

Delphine turned to her friend, “Paul, the complex is back there.”

 

“I know Delphine, I'm not taking you home.”

 

“What? Where are we going?”

 

“I’m going to give you and Cosima a way out of all of this.”

 

Delphine was confused, “where are we going, Paul?”

 

“Just trust me, Del, we’ll be there in 10 minutes. I’ll explain when we get there.”

 

Delphine nodded, she trusted Paul but in light of recent circumstances she didn't like being kept in the dark more than necessary. 

 

Paul pulled into an underground car park, seemingly abandoned, dark, cold… _maybe I shouldn't have been too quick to trust him._ The car came to a halt in the middle of the concrete space and Paul got out of the car accompanied by Delphine.

 

Delphine walked towards Paul, “are you going to tell me what we’re doing here?”

 

Before Paul had a chance to respond, a car entered the car park and pulled up along side them. From the car, two women and a man emerged. The two women bared an uncanny resemblance to her fiancé, whilst the man was medium height, black, he couldn't be much older than herself. 

 

Paul squeezed Delphine’s shoulder reassuringly, “Delphine, this is Sarah Manning”, Paul gestured towards the first woman, moving onto the next woman, “this is Alison Hendrix and this is Detective Arthur Bell”.

 

Delphine smiled hesitantly, “hello it’s nice to meet you all but… I don’t understand Paul, why am I here?”

 

Sarah scoffed, “what the fuck Paul, you didn't tell her?”

 

Paul bit back, “no Sarah I couldn’t risk anyone finding out could I?

 

Sarah stepped towards Delphine, “listen blondie, me and Alison are in the same situation as Cos. Same disease, same treatment payment plan. We’re tired of Leekie’s shit- we want out and you’re going to help us.”

 

Alison nudged the punk, “please help us… it doesn’t hurt to be polite Sarah.”

 

Delphine looked at the women dumbstruck, “I… I don’t know what you expect me do to but I may be able to help you with your treatment.”

 

Art raises an eyebrow at Delphine, “What do you mean?”

 

“This morning Cosima attained a sample of your shot, I assume she’s sequencing its formula now. We can replicate the shot once we know what's in it to produce a cure. You won't need Aldous… never again will you have to be at his mercy.”

 

Alison squealed, “oh my! Sarah! We can tell him to shove his shot where the sun doesn’t shine”

 

Sarah wasn't so easily convinced, “don’t fuck about blondie, do you mean it?”

 

“Well yes, Cosima really does have a sample of your shot but I’m not exactly in a position to contact her at the moment so I can't be certain about the progress she is making in sequencing it, but knowing her, she is doing everything possible to help you and Alison, and herself.”

 

Paul briefly smiles at Delphine, “Cosima is brilliant, she won't stop until she finds a cure for you all trust me.”

 

Sarah exhaled slowly, “great- that doesn't mean I’m not going to kill him.”

 

Art looked at the brunette with annoyance, “Sarah we’re not having this discussion again.”

 

“For fuck sake Art you said you wanted to help us- so help me by turning a blind eye.”

 

Delphine felt obliged to interject, “non Sarah- I understand how you must feel but-“

 

“Do you Delphine? Huh? What the fuck do you know about any of this?”

 

Delphine knew this wasn't what her finance would want, they weren't monsters, she felt she had to deter the brunette just as she had Scott, “I just meant that he isn't worth the regret you’ll carry-“

 

“Exactly- you know nothing. Don't preach to me about morals until you've been where I have okay? You have no idea- you’re probably just helping us for the credit you'll get as the scientist who cured us!”

 

Alison snapped, “Sarah! Stop it! Cosima trusts her which means we have to as well okay?”

 

Delphine felt her gaze rise to meet Sarah’s, “non Sarah you’re right I haven't been where you have and I’m so sorry that you've been put in this position, I am. But don't you dare question my intentions for trying to help you. When Cosima told me about what she’s had to do- when she broke down in my arms- I felt it, all of the hurt and anger and disgust, I wanted to kill Aldous for what he had done to her, for what he has done to you, so don’t tell me that I don't understand Sarah because trust me when I say that I am probably one of the few people you will ever meet who does.”

 

Art looked at the blonde and nodded in appreciation, “she’s right Sarah lay off. And were not hurting Aldous. I said I’ll help you and I will.”

 

Sarah snapped, “how Art?! I can’t just stand back and do nothing.”

 

“As soon as Cosima has made you a cure, I’ll have all the evidence I need of his wrong doings. The cure will act as hard solid proof of his indiscretions. That along with all of your testimonies and his technological communications to you all- I know that there will be no way of a conviction not happening. I can assure you. You just need to wait until Cosima has found you a cure and then we will nail this fucker okay?”

 

Sarah nodded and pulled a weepy Alison into a tight embrace.

 

Art continues, “then it's agreed we wait. Nothing happens until we cure you all. Then we can decide on a course of action.”

 

Everyone nods. An unspoken agreement not to touch Leekie until they were certain that the girls were safe. Everyone heads back to their cars and leaves, until next time.

 

Paul begins the short journey home. Neither speaking a word, rather a comfortable silence fills the car knowing that they were in agreement about the Leekie situation. Paul yet again drives past Delphine's home in pursuit of another destination.

 

“Mon dieu, Paul stop kidnapping me!” Delphine had meant to sound serious but she couldn’t help but release a small chuckle. 

 

Paul laughed in response, “I’m sorry Del, but you have to understand that everything has to be kept wordless for now, but I promise this time I'm not going to bombard you with a rude English woman.”

 

Delphine sighed, “It's okay, I understand why she was upset, I would be.”

 

“She just doesn't know who she can trust, it's not personal, if circumstances were different I’m sure you two would be friends.”

 

Delphine scoffed, “yeah sure why not. Maybe when pigs fly or humans travel to the sun or when humans can be cloned.”

 

Paul winked, “hey you never know.”

 

Paul pulled up outside a house, it was dark inside appearing vacant.

 

“Whose house is this?”

 

“Mine.”

 

Delphine raised an eyebrow, “mhm okay, and why am I at your house?”

 

“Just trust me… again. Go inside, I’ll be back in a few hours I have some things that I need to do.”

 

“But what-“

 

Paul chuckled, “Delphine! Go inside the house.”

 

Delphine opened her mouth as to speak but decided better of it. Instead, she got out the car and walked towards Paul’s home. Delphine had assumed Paul knew something she didn’t- she assumed that Paul thought she was in danger and that this would act as an impromptu safe house. 

 

Delphine opened the front door and walked inside assuming the house was empty from its outward appearance. It was cold in the hallway, Delphine couldn’t see anything through the darkness. She felt completely alone until she heard a voice from around the corner leading into the living room. 

 

“Well well well Dr. Cormier I hope you don't make a habit of walking into handsome men's homes- especially when you have a devoted fiancé waiting for you at home.”

 

Delphine followed the voice and spun around to see a doe-eyed Cosima standing amongst a sea of lit candles and rose petals in the living room, gazing at her with a single rose in her hand.

 

“COSIMA!” Delphine ran over to her little brunette and embraced her with such force she was sure they would both topple over and set Paul’s house on fire.

 

Cosima looked up at Delphine and kissed her sweetly, “hey you, happy to see me much?”

 

“Are you joking? Yes! I mean I know I saw you this morning but you know…you called me a succubus so I assumed we weren't on speaking terms.”

 

Cosima chuckled, “I know, I know I'm sorry. But hey at least I know that if the whole scientist thing doesn't work out I can be an actress. I think my performance this morning would have definitely won me an Emmy.” 

 

Delphine laughed at the cheekiness of the brunette, “Bon, I agree. Cosima is it.. are we safe here?”

 

“Yes completely. Paul was in the military before he worked at DYAD. His house is fully bug proof and sound proof. Plus he has all these sensors and technical shit that I don't understand- but he assures me no one can get in or out unless he says so, plus he made sure you weren't followed- no one can spy on us here.”

 

Delphine smiled at the thought of them getting an uninterrupted moment alone, “this is amazing. Thank you for my rose.”

 

“You’re most welcome babe.”

 

“I met Sarah and Alison and Art. They were… intense to say the least. But it’s clear that they love you very much.”

 

“Yeah well, we all care about each other so much you know? They’ve been in the same boat I have for so long.”

 

“Oui I know. Wait… mon dieu! Cosima the shot! Jesus Christ why must you always distract me with your charm!”

 

“Hey, I just put it out there it's not my fault that you’re so susceptible to it!”

 

“COSIMA THE SHOT!”

 

Cosima gained slyly, “what about the shot?”

 

Delphine pinched her hip playfully and pulled her tighter, “Cosima so help me God!”

 

“Okay, okay!”

 

Cosima leaned in and kissed Delphine gently and lingered over her lips, “I’m cured.”

 

Delphine let out a deep throaty chuckle, “wait. What?”

 

“As soon as you brilliantly slipped the shot into my coat… kudos to you by the way… I ran and told Scott and he gave me the keys to his place. He has this lab in his basement and I figured it would be safer to sequence the formula there. So long story short- I ran the sequence, found the formula, grew a culture, and boom- from there the stages were pretty basic. The formula was so simple. Like totally rudimentary considering.”

 

Delphine sobbed and cupped Cosima’s cheek, “Cosima, you found your cure.”

 

“Yep, well technically we found it. I wouldn't have gotten the sample without you.”

 

“Mon amour, how do you know its working?”

 

“I ran a blood test before I left to come here. Scott called me with the results just before you arrived.”

 

“And…”

 

“And my auto-immune cells are most defiantly in remission. Like obvs there not completely gone and it’s probs going to take a while before I’m completely disease free but they are most defiantly on the way out. Au revoir mon petite fuckers.”

 

Delphine laughed and hugged Cosima as tears soaked her cheeks. 

 

“I can't believe it. You’re free.”

 

“Yes, I am.”

 

“I’m so proud of you Cosima.”

 

“I'm proud of you too. You didn't have to do what you did, it was risky Delphine. And though I really wish you wouldn't have done it in case Leekie saw you- I’m also so glad you did because now me and Sarah and Alison can live our lives you know? And that is all down to you. Thank you.”

 

“Bien sur I don’t break my promises.”

 

“Now, I know that you said you wanted me forever, and that was easier said than done when you thought that forever was going to be a month. So Delphine, last chance to back out, would you like to spend the next 60 or so years with me?”

 

Delphine ran her knuckles along Cosima’s jaw, “I don’t have a choice.”

 

“What do you mean of course you do?”

 

“Non mon coeur, I haven't had a choice since the moment I opened my front door and saw you giving me that toothy grin of yours. I haven't been able to think rationally since you left me that first night in my house. We both know it’s crazy, illogical and most defiantly not advisable but I don't care what anyone else says I’m exactly where I want to be- for now, and my remaining 60 or so years.”

 

Cosima flashed Delphine her signature grin, “oh Dr. Cormier aren't we the romantic?”

 

“Cosima, _you_ asked me out on our first date. _You_ asked me to be your girlfriend. _You_ asked me to marry you and…”, Delphine looked around at her surrounding, “… _your_ standing in a pool or rose petals and candles handing me a rose. And you think _I’m_ the romantic one in this relationship?”

 

“Yeah well, you quite literally saved my life- in so many more ways than you’ll ever know.”

 

“Bon then we’re even.”

 

“Oui. Oh and I have another surprise for you.”

 

“What could be better than you being cured?”

 

“Well… basically… yesterday I kind of got all sentimental when I thought about the fact I was going to die soon.”

 

“Okay…”

 

“So I may or may not have planned our wedding.”

 

“You what?”

 

“Yeah I started reflecting on my life and I’ve done pretty much everything I’ve ever wanted to do. There was just one thing I wanted to do before I left this place.”

 

“Marry me.”

 

“Exactly. So if you want to wait and plan a big wedding with like 500 guests and a ridiculous budget then I am more than happy to cancel my thing. But… if you want to… just marry me, then everything is sorted.”

 

“Of course I want to do your thing. I just want you.”

 

“Good then I’ll see you next week at our wedding.”

 

“Wait next week?”

 

“Yep, I was working on a rather tight schedule and I wanted to leave plenty of time for the honeymoon.”

 

“You’ve planned a honeymoon as well?!”

 

“Oui and the reception! We leave for the honeymoon the morning after our wedding.”

 

Delphine smiled into a soft kiss, “and where are we going?”

 

“Well, Miss Cormier that would be telling now wouldn't it?”

 

“So basically I have no say in our wedding, or reception or honeymoon?”

 

“Nope. I mean I could tell you but I think it will be more fun this way.”

 

“More fun for you- you mean?”

 

“Yes. Don't worry I promise that you’ll love it.”

 

“D’accord I trust you.”

 

“Good. Now, although I’m cured there is still no way in hell I’m risking Leekie finding out about us- at least not when you’re still working for him. So until Art does his cop thing we still have to act as though we’re not together- which means that tonight is the last night you’re going to see me before we walk down the isle so I suggest we make the most of our last few hours together as single ladies.”

 

“Oh, so you’re a single lady?”

 

“Well I guess in the legal sense of the word and I guess technically in the biblical sense as well considering how were not married yet.”

 

“Okay well, then Miss Niehaus I had better give you a sufficient send off from the single life before you’re bound to me forever.”

 

Cosima grew on her tip toes and cupped Delphine's cheeks in her hands before giving her an eager kiss, “I couldn’t agree with you more.” 

 

Cosima led Delphine to Paul’s guest bedroom, she knew that they wouldn't have the whole night together, soon he would return to take Delphine home before anyone could suspect anything. But for now, they had each other and with the promise of forever now a reality rather than a possibility they were free to plan their lives together without fear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Although I don't speak French I'm currently trying to learn it and therefore all of the French in this fic is written by me- I'm so sorry if it is wrong, i don't mean to offend any French speaking person reading this <3


	15. The Scientist

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a mini-chapter to fill in some gaps and prepare us for the next chapter a.k.a the wedding chapter ;)
> 
> Thank you all so much for your love and support since my last update- we reached 100 Kudos! Which I know to some people may not appear to be very much but to me, it honestly means the world. Thank you all! <3
> 
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RB-RcX5DS5A

The following morning Cosima awoke in her empty bed craving the comfort of her missing fiancé. However today was a good day, Cosima was cured and no longer reliant on the so-called 'good grace' of a man she detested. She exhaled slowly and rolled herself out of bed retrieving her burn phone from the nightstand draw before making her way into her kitchen to grab some coffee. 

Cosima pulled up her messages and text two unknown numbers.

 

 _Cosima_ : **Just one, I’m a few, no family too. Who am I?**

 

Cosima left her phone on her kitchen table before going to shower and get ready for work.

 

After, when Cosima returned to her phone she saw two unread messages, one from each contact. 

 

 _Contact 1:_ **A clone.**

 

 _Contact 2:_ **A clone.**

 

Cosima breathed a sigh of relief, her sisters were safe and their contact had not been compromised. Cosima replied as fast as she could before proceeding to delete the messages and place the phone back in its original place, battery and sim card removed.

 

 _Cosima:_ **Scott's basement. 12PM.**

 

Cosima left for work, she worked tirelessly until lunch time. She felt great, incredible in fact but that didn't stop Scott making a fuss of her every chance he got. Nevertheless, she appreciated his concerns, he had been with her from the very beginning, he had endured her endless self-loathing and tantrums and never once did he leave her side and she knew that after all of this was over he still never would. 

 

When lunchtime eventually rolled around Cosima excused herself and left for Scott's basement, she knew no one would question where she was going, she frequently went out for lunch and never heard so much as a whisper as to where she was going or who she was going with. 

 

When she arrived at Scott's basement she noticed the door slightly ajar. She proceeded down the stairs with caution before being met by two smiling faces. 

 

“Cos!”

 

“Cosima!”

 

Cosima chuckled at Alison and Sarah, “what's up my sisters from other misters?”

 

Cosima was bought into a group hug by Sarah as the three of them embraced one another as if they haven't seen each other in years.

 

Sarah looked at her with concern, “what are we doing here Cos I thought you said it's not safe for us to keep meeting up like this?”

 

“Well, technically it's not but I think today we can make an exception considering its a special occasion.”

 

“Whats the occasion?” Alison asked.

 

“Yeah, what's up? Your girl said you stole the shot from Leekie?”

 

“Well, technically my girl stole it from him.”

 

“So does that mean you have it?” Alison was not one for tip-toeing around the issue.

 

“Yeah, we did it, Ali. I’ve got a cure. I injected it to myself yesterday, the diseased cells are in remission permanently, I checked my blood work this morning and there's no sign of a relapse so far which is toats promising.”

 

Sarah chuckled in disbelief, “holy fuck.”

 

“I know two and a half years but we did it, no more monthly appointments and definitely no more Leekie.”

 

Alison was already in tears, “I… I don't know what to say.”

 

“Blondie wasn't kidding?” Sarah raised her arm to her forehead suddenly feeling lightheaded. 

 

“Ha! Blondie? Is that what you were calling her? Poor Delphine between you and I she's either Frenchie or Blondie.”

 

“Great well now I feel like an arse.”

 

“That's because you were Sarah,” Ali nudged her.

 

“Wait huh?” Cosima asked confused.

 

“I kind of gave her a hard time yesterday.”

 

“Shit Sarah why? She's the reason we have a cure and you were a bitch to her?”

 

“Yeah I thought she was doing it for the credit.”

 

“Wow okay, and you couldn't just believe me when I said that she was doing it because she loved me?”

 

“C’mon Cos its been like a month.”

 

“For fuck sake Sarah you’re going to make this right with her.”

 

“I will okay Jesus.”

 

“Good you can apologise at our wedding.”

 

Alison squealed, “What? Your wedding?”

 

Cosima dropped her frown and felt a smile creep across her lips, “yeah, we’re getting married next week.”

 

“Next week? No no no that's not enough time to plan a wedding! Have you thought about catering and venues and everything else?”

 

Cosima laughed at Alison's enthusiasm, "chill out Ali, everything's been taken care of."

 

Sarah scoffed, “Fucking hell Cos you don't waste any time of you?”

 

“Nope. I do not- so drop the attitude, Sarah, because I expect you both to be there as my bridesmaids okay?”

 

Both women nodded in agreement.

 

“Good now sit down and let me stick a needle in you.”

 

Sarah followed suit, “so this is gonna work yeah?”

 

“Yes Sarah it is working, within a few months we’ll be disease free permanently, no need for booster shots as of yet.”

 

Sarah sat and Cosima sterilised her arm before injecting her with her cure.

 

“Good, that means we can call Art.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Nothing Cos.”

 

Alison interjected, “Sarah she's as much a part of this as we are, we can't exclude her from this.”

 

“Exclude me from what?” Cosima asked confused.

 

Sarah looked up at Cosima, “I’m going to kill him Cos, I’m going to destroy him.”

 

“What? Fucking hell Sarah! How are you going to do that huh? Are you going to be the one to do it because you can be sure that no one else will do it for you! Jesus Christ, you’ll go to prison Sarah, what about Kira and Cal, what about us don't be so fucking selfish?!”

 

“Selfish? You think I’m selfish? I’m doing this for us Cos, me and Alison and especially for you.”

 

“What do you mean especially for me? I don't want you to kill him for me. Do you hear me?”

 

“You were always his favourite Cos. Sure what he did to me and Ali was bad but he was always so much more possessive with you. Not to mention the fact that only a few weeks ago he nearly killed you.”

 

“Sarah, I don't know how I can make this any clearer. I do not want you to touch Leekie, for me or Ali and not even for yourself.”

 

Alison positioned herself between the two women, “she's right Sarah, Art said he can convict him with all this new evidence.”

 

“That's not good enough Ali. He hurt us. For over two years he had no shame, no remorse, no empathy, someone who is capable of that doesn't deserve to live.”

 

Cosima pleaded with her, “let Art handle this Sarah! Please, we’ve already lost the last two years of our lives to him. We have our families and we have each other, we can start our lives over the way we deserve without fear.”

 

Sarah broke down in a fit of tears, “I don't know how to let this go Cos.”

 

Cosima knelt down next to her and held her tight, “I know you don't it's okay, me and Ali are going to help you, were here okay, always.”

 

Sarah raised her head to look at the two women and nodded gently, “thanks geek.”

 

Cosima offered her a warm smile and a small chuckle, “sure thing bitch.”


	16. Keeping Your Head Up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, your kudos and comments mean so much to me, so thank you- I love hearing what you guys think!
> 
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8AXUq5uA0Y

**ONE WEEK LATER**

It’s hard to know where to begin when trying to tell people our story. It starts out as any normal romance story does. Girl meets girl and girl falls in love with girl. Then it gets complicated, girls fight and break up, girls reconcile and break up again. One girl nearly dies and the girls reconcile yet again, girl tells other girl that she is dying. Girl goes a fierce crusade to cure her girl and succeeds and they live happily ever after. 

 

Well, that's the stage that we're at now at least. It has been a full week since the night I met Cosima in Paul’s home. A full week of no contact with her, not even seeing her in passing at DYAD and it's been torture. 

 

But not to dwell on the negatives- many positives to note. For example, last night I was lying in bed, it was only 8PM but I was getting married the next morning so I wanted my beauty sleep. When I heard my phone ring, I reluctantly looked at it and realized that it was Cosima so naturally, I immediately answered. 

 

_“Cosima, what's wrong?”_

 

_Cosima chuckled, “nothing babe.”_

 

_“Mon cheri, you know it's not safe to call me just because you want to talk.”_

 

_“Actually it is…”_

 

_“What do you mean?”_

 

_“Art did it. He arrested Leekie this morning, he just called me.”_

 

_“Cosima… what! That's amazing!”_

 

_“I know! Now we don't have to worry or hide anymore.”_

 

_“I can't believe it! I love you.”_

 

_“Hmm does that mean you want me to come over?”_

 

_“Non Cosima, were getting married tomorrow. It’s bad luck to see me before the wedding.”_

 

_“Ha! Babe, I think we've had enough bad luck in the past month to last us our lifetime. I think we’ll be okay.”_

 

_“Well… I do miss you like crazy.”_

 

_“Great! I’ll be there in like 10 seconds.”_

 

And she was. She let herself into my house the way she normally did, she immediately ran towards my bedroom, I could hear her giggling and puffing away with each step she took. She finally burst through the door and stripped down to her underwear and joined me in bed. Despite her best efforts we just cuddled until we fell asleep.

 

And now after an incredibly peaceful sleep I have woken up, with her in my arms for the first time in weeks and we’re about to get married. I know that everyone says that its normal to be nervous or get cold feet but I'm not nervous, not even in the slightest. The fact that Aldous is behind bars and I’m about to marry the love of my life means that today is literally the single greatest day of my life. 

 

Delphine scooted down the bed to look upon her fiance's sleeping face, “Cosima mon amour, wake up.”

 

“Mmm nope.”

 

Delphine smiled and kissed Cosima's bare shoulder, “but we’re getting married today and I cant do that without you there.”

 

Cosima lifted her head from Delphine chest and gave her a toothy grin, “we’re getting married today.”

 

“Oui, we are.” 

 

Cosima chuckled and straddled her fiancé’s hips and pulled her up. She kissed her gently and laced her hands around Delphine's neck, undoing her necklace. She slid the engagement ring off of the chain and placed it back in its rightful place on Delphine's wedding finger. 

 

“Much better.”

 

Delphine brought her left hand up to stroke Cosima’s cheek and admired her ring, “I agree.”

 

“Now I hate to wake up with you and then run out on you again but I have to go and prepare for our wedding day.”

 

“Hmm If I remember correctly, last time we were in this position, you promised that after our first date I was free to hold you captive as my sex slave non?”

 

“Well technically yes- but I don't want to explain to your parents that you were late to your wedding because you was having sex with me.”

 

“Quoi?”

 

“Shit that was one of your surprises! Oh, fuck it oh well, you have exactly 30 minutes before you parents knock on your door for their daughter's wedding day so you best act surprised okay?”

 

Delphine flipped Cosima over and pushed her against the mattress and kissed her fiercely, “how? Are my parents are really coming?”

 

“Of course they are, I know how important they are to you. Oh, and I may have accidentally outed you to them so… welcome out of the closet! They seemed to be thrilled though which totally surprised me but I’ve been skyping with you mom every day this past week and to be honest, I think she wants to adopt me or something, she loves me.”

 

Delphine chuckled as a tear of happiness fell onto the brunette's shoulder, “I can't believe it. I love you so much, thank you.”

 

“You’re welcome and I like you too.”

 

“Excuse me? Like?”

 

“Yep like. I’m not saying the other thing until I’m holding your hand at the altar. I want the next time you hear me say it to be when I’m giving myself to you forever.”

 

“Did you really ever think I was the romantic one? Seriously? Have you heard yourself?”

 

Cosima pinched Delphine's hip playfully, “hey! I’m not going to apologise for my heart okay?”

 

“D’accord, I would never ask you to.”

 

“Good now mon cheri, I must dash, things to do, people to see. I cant wait to see the wedding dress you picked out.”

 

Delphine shot upright in bed, “what?! Cosima! You said you had everything sorted! I haven't got a dress!”

 

“Well, then you should just wear that white lacy underwear I saw you buy a couple of weeks ago.”

 

“Cosima!”

 

“Chill babe, I’m kidding! Everything is sorted- I gave you mom a strict set of instructions and maps and schedules. Everything will be perfect,”

 

“You’re such a brat. I take it back. I don't want to marry you.”

 

Cosima tried her best to wink at Delphine, even though it turned out to be more of a blink, “you said that you don't have a choice remember.”

 

Delphine gave Cosima a final kiss as fiancé's before murmuring, “you are so cute.”

 

With that, Cosima swiftly exited Delphine's house and made her way home. Delphine just about had time to shower and throw on some sweat pants and a tank top before she heard a knock at her door. 

 

Delphine ran to her front door and opened it to be met with her parent's wide grins, they were both dressed so smart, at that moment Delphine swore she couldn't be any prouder of her parents, “maman, papa!”

 

She pulled both of her parents into a hug and felt them return her embrace.

 

Delphine's father pulled out of their embrace and put her hand softly on his daughter's cheek, “Delphine, ma belle fille. Félicitations à vous (my beautiful girl, congratulations).”

 

“Merci papa. Je ne peux pas croire que vous êtes ici (I cant believe that you’re here).”

 

Delphine's mother held her daughter's hand, “ma fille est bien sûr. Il est de votre journée de mariage. Maintenant, nous devons préparer. Je suis sur un calendrier serré. (My daughter of course. It is your wedding day. Now we must prepare. I'm on a tight schedule).”

 

Delphine chuckled imagining Cosima bossing her typically stern mother around, the image warmed her heart. Delphine’s mother ordered her father to loiter around the living room, leaving the girls to get ready. 

 

Delphine led her mother up to her room only now noticing the garment bag draped over her arm.

 

“Est que ma robe? (Is that my dress?)”

 

“Yes is it.”

 

“Quoi?”

 

“Cosima has been teaching your father and I English, we’re still a little uncertain but we know the basics.”

 

“Maman, that is wonderful!”

 

“Do you know what else is wonderful?… Cosima.”

 

“Merci maman, but you don't think it's too soon?”

 

“Delphine mon amour sit down.” Delphine sat on the edge of her bed and her mother joined her bringing her hands into her lap.

 

“Delphine. I would be lying if I said that at first when Cosima called me I wasn't a little… worried, yes that's the word. But she explained the situation to your father and I. She told us about her illness. She told us that although she was uncertain how long she would be here, she wanted to spend whatever time she had left bound to you. And then I got a call a couple of days ago from my favorite little American informing me that she was cured. She told me that despite her newfound freedom, her intentions hadn't changed that she still wanted to be yours forever and as a mother that's when I knew. I knew that she would spend her entire life devoted to you and she would do whatever she could to make you happy. And that is all a mother ever wants for her daughter- for her to be happy. And so if Cosima makes you feel this way then what does it matter how long you’ve know each other. Live life to the fullest and love her as though you’ll never love anyone else again.”

 

“Thank you, I never knew how much I needed you and papa here until you actually were.”

 

“Of course, now let's get you married.”

 

The next hour flew by in a flash. Delphine’s mother had shown her the wedding dress that Cosima had picked out for her and her eyes welled up at the sight. It was perfect. Floor length, figure hugging with lace sleeves, it was as if the dress had been made for her. She put it on accompanied by some cream heels that Cosima had provided and she looked beautiful. She left her blonde curls to hang around her shoulders, she knew Cosima loved to stroke them and completed her makeup, it was subtle yet she still looked flawless. 

 

Delphine and her mother went downstairs to meet her father. He was a traditional man with little to no emotions ever on full display. And yet at the sight of his daughter in a wedding dress, he cried as though he had never seen anything so beautiful. Delphine ran over to him and hugged him, he squeezed her tight careful not to ruin her dress. 

 

“Delphine, you look beautiful. I am so proud to be your father.”

 

“Merci papa.” 

 

“Now let’s get you to the church Cosima will kill me if you are late, quite literally, she has already threatened to do it once today.”

 

Delphine chuckled and interlinked her arm with her fathers and walked out of her house only to be greeted by Paul in a suit and top hat opening the door to a beautiful white, classic wedding car. 

 

“Oh mon dieu, Paul!”

 

“Delphine, you look incredible. Truly, you’re a vision of beauty.”

 

“Thank you, Paul.”

 

“Now in case you haven't noticed, myself and your parents are terrified of the bridezilla that Cosima has become, so shall we, it's best not to keep her waiting,” Paul gestured towards their car.

 

Paul helped Delphine and her parents into the car and they set off to their destination. Despite Delphine’s protests, Paul kept a tight lip on their location, as did her parents. Delphine was so distracted by her discussion with her parents that she didn't even realize the car had come to a halt. 

 

Delphine exited the car and realized where she was. She was stood at the top of the lookout point where her and Cosima had their first date, she felt a tear fall down her cheek. _She is so the romantic one in this relationship._

 

“Are you ready little one?”

 

“Oui papa, I’ve never been more ready for anything in my life.”

 


	17. Never Let Me Go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all of your support <3 
> 
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zMBTvuUlm98

Delphine walked arm in arm with her father to the top of the aisle. She could see the beautiful Toronto skyline lighting up her destination. Cosima had decorated the space in all of it's entirety with fairy lights, they illuminated her path to the altar. It was decorated with beautiful white lilies hanging from trees that hung over them and a beautiful floral wedding arch. Cosima had cleared the area of people and food trucks, it was just a vast expanse of flowers and lights and decorations and it was all there for Delphine. 

 

She could see Scott waiting for her at the altar in his best Tux and Sarah and Alison in indigo form-hugging dresses standing opposite him. In the few rows of chairs sat Cosima’s immediate family that she could recognize from photos, Paul with Randy and Peter and finally two empty seats for Delphine's parents to occupy once they had walked her down the aisle. 

 

Delphine heard the sound of the wedding march being played by a small orchestra which sat on the left-hand side of the altar, which signified that it was time for the ceremony to start. Just as she was about to start her descent to the altar she saw her wife-to-be come into focus. Cosima was waiting at the altar grinning at her. She looked beautiful. She was wearing a white dress that stopped at her knees, it had thin straps and it hugged her figure effortlessly. In Delphine’s eyes she was the most beautiful woman in the world, and when her gaze met Cosima’s, she knew Cosima was thinking the same about her. 

 

Cosima turned to Ali and Sarah excited and muttered under her breath, “She’s going to be my wife.”

 

Delphine began to walk towards the brunette and couldn’t help but stifle a small chuckle with each step she took towards her, she couldn’t believe she was about to marry her love, her Cosima. 

 

When Delphine finally reached the top of the altar she watched as her parents gave Cosima a kiss on each cheek and their blessing, noticing that her parents embraced her as though she was one of their own. 

 

When the pair were finally opposite one another Cosima reached down and intertwined her fingers with Delphine’s, “hi”, was all she could muster in awe of Delphine's beauty.

 

“Bonjour mon coeur.”

 

“You look beautiful. I hope this is okay. I just figured that it would be a cute idea to go back to where we began.”

 

“Mon amour, this is beyond okay. This is perfect, thank you. And you look lovely, perfect in fact. ”

 

“Bien sur Mademoiselle Cormier.” 

 

The vicar looked back and forth between the two women and couldn’t help a smile from forming on his face. He began the service, Cosima had asked him to focus more on the blessing element of the ceremony, she was an evolutionary biologist after all. The time had finally come for the two to exchange vows, this would be the last step before the couple was officially married. 

 

Delphine began by placing a white gold wedding band on Cosima’s finger, feeling a tear fall down her cheek, “Cosima, my geeky little Canadian, how do I even begin to explain my feelings for you?” Delphine chuckled and cupped Cosima’s cheeks in her hand, “it’s hard to imagine that a little over a month ago I was on a plane leaving my home and my family to move to this big new scary city. I was truly terrified about whether I would be successful or whether I would fit in. And then I met Paul and he told me how brilliant my boss Dr. Niehaus is, of course, in the beginning, I thought you were a man… sorry. But then that night you came to my house to introduce yourself and you were the furthest thing from what I had expected. You were funny and quirky and you were so bold and fearless, you made me blush more in that half an hour than I ever had with anyone else before. You made me feel at ease, you made me feel safe, and suddenly I wasn't so afraid anymore. You were so charming and thinking about it now how could I not have fallen completely in love with you? When I think about how long we've know each other it seems crazy to think about where we are now but I truly believe that we were destined to be here right now with each other, I think that you and I will always be inevitable to one another. A wise woman once told me to love you as though I would never love again and I promise you right now Cosima in front of our friends and family that I will, I will love you every day and only you, and you know that making promises is not something which I enter into lightly but I promise I will love you until my last breathe mon amour.”

 

Cosima cried tears of happiness and stroked Delphine's cheeks with her knuckles. She rested her head in the crook of Delphine neck and squeezed her tight before pulling back and gazing into her eyes. 

 

“How I am meant to follow on from that?" Cosima chuckled and placed Delphine's wedding band on her finger, "Okay let me try. I want to start by saying thank you, Delphine. Thank you for never giving up on me, even at times when I wasn't very loveable, you always stayed with me. Not only did you cure me and Sarah and Ali but you saved me from a really dark place. I'm sure it's not news to anyone how intolerable I was the past few months but then I met you and it was suddenly as though nothing else mattered, as though I didn't have to be so sad anymore because I had you there to save me. I hope that by this stage, after all we've been through together, you know how madly in love with you I am. Because you feel inevitable to me too Delphine, even if everything about us is predetermined, even if we have no free will, I wouldn't change a second of our lives together, in fact I count my blessing each time I look at you because by some beautiful twist of fate or destiny or purpose you're standing in front of me now allowing me to tell you how much you mean to me. And I know when I proposed to you I promised you a life of happiness with our own house and our family, even though at the time I thought that I wouldn't have long left. But now I'm cured and I want you to know that I still intend to give you all of those things babe, I want to give you a life that you can reflect on with no regrets because I plan on giving you everything I can. So for the last time thank you, for being you and for allowing me to spend the rest of my life with the most beautiful, intelligent, funny, caring woman I have ever met. I love you, Delphine Cormier with everything I am."

 

The Vicar offered Delphine his handkerchief from his breast pocket because naturally she was sobbing and embracing Cosima at the same time. The Vicar looked at both women and finally said the 6 most beautiful words either woman had ever heard, “you may now kiss your bride.”

 

Cosima squealed and snaked her arms around Delphine's neck and pulled her into a tender kiss. Cosima pulled back and rested her forehead against Delphine's, “we made it.”

 

Delphine kissed her wife, “I never doubted that we would.”

 

Cosima led Delphine to their wedding car where Paul drove them back to Cosima’s house. Unbeknown to Delphine, Cosima had decorated her entire back garden to celebrate the occasion. By this stage the sun was beginning to set, there were fairly lights illuminating the entire space, with a dance floor in the middle of the grass area, even Ali’s husband Donnie was acting as an impromptu DJ with his booth set up in the corner. It looked beautiful, just like a scene from a fairytale. 

 

Delphine pulled her wife in for a hug, “Cosima, this is beautiful. You never cease to surprise me.”

 

Cosima looked up at the blonde and smiled, “I was going to hire out that fancy French restaurant where we had our first date.”

 

“What made you change your mind?”

 

“Well...I wanted to have our reception here because... I know that we’ve done this in a really unconventional order but I wanted us to begin our lives as a married couple here because I wanted to ask you to move in with me.” 

 

Delphine smiled, “oh is that so…”

 

“Yep. I mean we could like totally move into your place if you wanted-“

 

“-Non Cosima, I want to live here with you, in our house.”

 

Delphine placed her hands around Cosima’s waist and kissed her softly, “I can’t wait to live with you and wake up with you every morning and tell you how much I love you.”

 

“I know me too. And now we can babe. It’s actually happening, we’re married and moving in together and our lives with each other can finally start.”

 

Just as Cosima was about to kiss her wife the rest of the wedding party arrived. The pair were pried apart by Sarah telling them that they had to keep their displays of affection to a PG13 rating as there were parents present. 

 

The evening passed far too quickly, Delphine and Cosima each had their dances with their fathers each crying as their parents whispered terms of love and proudness into their ears. Then in true Cosima fashion, she stole Mr. Cormier away from Delphine to carry out the remainder of her father-daughter dance with. Delphine followed suit and found that she fit in perfectly with Mr. Niehaus and the rest of the Niehaus clan. They were much like her wife, loving and caring and fiercely protective, which only made Delphine love her in-laws even more. They were one big happy blended family.

 

The evening continued, everyone was gathered around a fire pit, with drinks flowing and embarrassing stories of Delphine and Cosima being told by their parents. Even Sarah, Ali and all of the boys had an anecdote which they felt Delphine should hear about her little brunette. Neither Delphine nor Cosima had ever felt so at home, with their families surrounding them and the promise of a future with each other a reality, they could finally breathe easy knowing that what awaited them was nothing but happiness. 

 

Cosima stood up and positioned herself in Delphine’s lap “now my beautiful wife, can I steal a dance.”

 

“Oui my love, I would be honored.”

 

Delphine lead Cosima to the dance floor where Cosima gave Donnie a thumbs up to signal for him to play their wedding song. 

 

Delphine placed her arms around the brunette's waist, “Cosima, please tell me you haven't picked out some rock and roll, grunge or EDM kind of music for our wedding song.”

 

“Dr Cormier, do you have no faith in me at all?”

 

“Hmm I’m reluctant to say yes. However you haven't let me down yet, so I’m inclined to say that I trust you completely.”

 

“I figured that this song expressed everything I’ve ever felt for you, everything I’ve ever wanted to say to you but was too scared too. If ever you’re in doubt about my feelings for you, just listen to this and you’ll know exactly how much I love you.”

 

Before Delphine could respond the music had begun, Cosima wrapped her arms tight around her wife’s neck and swayed with her, whispering the lyrics into her ear.

 

 _Would you dance_  
_If I asked you to dance?_  
_Would you run_  
_And never look back?_  
_Would you cry_  
_If you saw me crying?_  
_And would you save my soul, tonight?_

 

 _Would you tremble_  
_If I touched your lips?_  
_Would you laugh?_  
_Oh please tell me this._  
_Now would you die_  
_For the one you loved?_  
_Hold me in your arms, tonight._

 

Delphine sniffled as she whispered in Cosima's ear, “I love you.”

 

 

 _I can be your hero, baby._  
_I can kiss away the pain._  
_I will stand by you forever._  
_You can take my breath away._

 

 _Would you swear_  
_That you'll always be mine?_  
_Or would you lie?_  
_Would you run and hide?_  
_Am I in too deep?_  
_Have I lost my mind?_  
_I don't care..._  
_You're here tonight._

 

Cosima buried her head in the crook of Delphine's neck and Delphine rested her head against Cosima's, “I love you too Delphine.”

 

 _Oh, I just want to hold you._  
_I just want to hold you._  
_Am I in too deep?_  
_Have I lost my mind?_  
_Well, I don't care..._  
_You're here tonight._

 

 _I can be your hero._  
_I can kiss away the pain._  
_And I will stand by you forever._  
_You can take my breath away._

 

“I am yours, Delphine.”

 

“As am I yours, Cosima.”

 

The newly-weds finished up their first dance and was greeted by a roar of applause from their guests, completely forgetting for those 3 minutes that anyone else existed outside of themselves. 

 

Cosima chuckled and kissed Delphine, “now babe, let me go and grab us some champagne so we can toast ourselves.”

 

“Mon amour, I think other people are supposed to toast us.”

 

“Yeah well if we have to wait for them, then I’m never going to get you alone.”

 

“Oh mhm I see your predicament, you go and get the champagne, I’ll get everyone’s attention.”

 

“Okay babe, I’ll be back in a sec.”

 

“D'accord I’ll be here missing you.”

 

Cosima stuck her tongue between her teeth and flashed Delphine the blondes favorite smile, “I’ll miss you too.”

 

Cosima practically sprinted into the house to gather the champagne and glasses. Delphine retreated to her friends and family, she was talking to Cosima’s parents and she couldn't help but chuckle at their insistence on having grandchildren. 

 

All attention was turned to Ali as she came running out of the house screaming for help. 

 

“Delphine!”

 

Delphine immediately ran to meet Alison half way, “Ali what happened are you okay?”

 

“No! I was coming back from the bathroom- I saw- I couldn’t stop them- I was too late- I'm so sorry!”

 

“Alison breathe what’s wrong?”

 

“It’s Aldous. He must be out on bail. He took Cosima.”


	18. Wherever You Will Go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do I need to thank you for your support again? You guys should know how much I appreciate you by now ;) <3
> 
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DChHEf0lpEE
> 
> Warning: angst, explicit language and it's going to hit you right in the feels (hopefully).

Have you ever had an out of body experience? As though you weren't yourself, as though you were an outsider watching yourself from a distance? That’s what I felt in that second. I was sure that this was a dream. And then I was pulled back into reality when Ali shook me violently by the shoulders. 

 

“Delphine!” Ali screamed. 

 

Delphine suddenly snapped back, “I need to go.”

 

“I’m coming with you.” Sarah followed.

 

“No Sarah go and get help now.”

 

“I’m not letting you go alone, Delphine! I’ll call Art on the way, he’ll know what to do.”

 

“I’ll take care of everything here. You bring her home safe,” Alison frantically yelled after the pair.

 

Delphine sprinted to her car with Sarah hot on her heels. Delphine quite literally jumped every red light and ran every stop sign going above and beyond the speed limit, a journey that should have taken 15 minutes only took 6. 

 

Delphine grabbed her key card from her glove box and exited the car leaving the doors open. She ran through the entrance to DYAD. Unfortunately not only was it a Saturday but it was also close to midnight- there was not a soul to be seen other than the security guards which would no doubt be at the other end of this massive establishment. 

 

Delphine swiped her key card and led her and Sarah up to Aldous’s office where she had no doubt she would find her wife. 

 

Once on the top floor, Delphine rammed Aldous’s office door open. Her heart sank in her stomach, a sudden wave of nausea and lightheadedness overcame her. She was met by Cosima standing against Aldous’s desk with him standing in front of her. He had a gun pointed to her head.

 

“GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM HER!” Sarah screamed as she took a step towards them.

 

“Sarah calm down!” Delphine snapped.

 

“He’s got a fucking gun to her head and you want me to calm down?!”

 

“Sarah please, you need to stay calm. Don't do anything to put him on edge.”

 

Aldous looked at the pair and sniggered, “Delphine I must say you look beautiful.”

 

Delphine took a step towards her wife only to be met with Aldous shaking his finger at her and tutting, signalling for her to stay put.  "I really am sorry to break up the celebration but I needed to be with Cosima."

 

“Aldous, what are you doing?”

 

“Isn’t it obvious Delphine? I’m going to kill your girlfr- sorry your wife.”

 

“No-“

 

“- I must say you nearly got away with it. Hell, you nearly fooled me. Imagine my surprise when I was released from prison, the prison that _you_ put me in, this afternoon only to have my private eye tell me that you were marrying Cosima. My Cosima. ”

 

“Aldous, we never wanted to insult you.”

 

“No? Because that is exactly what you did. Both of you. I would have expected this from Cosima, but you Delphine? I gave you everything you asked for. I continued to treat Cosima despite my better judgement because you asked me to, and this is how you repay me? By sneaking around behind my back- thinking that it was okay because I was in prison and out of the way?”

 

Sarah lunged towards the man only to be held back by Delphine, “listen Leekie, let her go, we’ve called the police they're on their way here- you won't get away with this do you hear me, arsehole?”

 

“Sarah, Sarah, Sarah- I don't expect to get away with this. My life is over either way, but if I’m going down then I’m taking Cosima with me. Hell can be a lonely place without someone there to keep me company.”

 

Cosima started at Delphine as though it would be the last time she ever saw her. She tried desperately to commit everything about the woman she loved to memory. Even though she was crying she was still the most beautiful person she had ever seen. 

 

“Oh, Delphine this all could have been avoided. All you had to do was stay away from her. She isn't yours.”

 

“Aldous I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. We’ll leave I promise you will never see us again, we won't be a problem anymore.”

 

“No Delphine, she's mine!”

 

“You're a psycho!” Sarah scolded.

 

“Sarah stop!” Delphine bit trying to calm down the aggressive woman. 

 

Finally, Cosima realised a small sniffle, quiet enough to be missed completely and said, “Aldous, let me go okay I know you don't want to hurt me. You don't have to do this. I know you’re a better man than this.” Of course, he wasn't but far be it for Cosima to provoke the beast.

 

Aldous took a step back and leant against the wall, “say it Cosima, tell your bitch that you’re mine. Tell her that you love me, that these past two and a half years have been the best years of your life. I love you Cosima- you're mine, not hers.”

 

Cosima looked at Delphine and smiled weakly before responding to him, “no Aldous.”

 

“What the fuck it wrong with you two? Why do you keep insisting on doing things counter intuitive to your survival?”

 

Delphine looked back to the brunette before answering, “Aldous let her go, please. We can talk just you and me d’accord? We can fix this.”

 

“No Delphine. Do you remember what I told you the night you promised me you'd break up with her? No? Let me remind you. I told you that if you deceived me then I would let her die and I would happily do so letting you watch, knowing that it was your fault.”

 

“Aldo-“

 

Aldous turned briefly to look at the despair and desperation on Delphine's face, “-She’s going to die, Delphine, right now, and it is all your fault. I hope that it was worth it. I hope the few hours you spent together today as each other's wife's was worth her life.”

 

Cosima took a step towards Leekie and looked him dead in the eye, "you're damn right they were."

 

**_Gun: cocked._ **

 

Cosima turned to the English woman and screamed, “Sarah get Delphine out of here now.” 

 

Sarah released a loud sob and grabbed Delphine and pushed her towards the door, Delphine escaped from her grasps and took a step towards her wife, “No Cosima- Get off me Sarah.”

 

Cosima choked back a sob, she couldn't leave Delphine without telling her that this wasn't her fault, she couldn’t die without Delphine knowing how sorry she was for making her a widow or how much she wishes she could stay with her. 

 

_Fuck. This isn't how this was supposed to end. Fuck destiny and fuck fate, this was never supposed to be how I left you, I thought we had the time. I never meant to leave you here behind I promise. We had plans, we had visions now I can't see ahead- I know I said forever- I said I'd grow old with you. I'm sorry._

_I can't leave you like this, I know you will never forgive yourself, even though none of this is your fault, no one will ever be able to convince you otherwise. If I had a choice I would change this, change everything, you deserves so much more than this, so much more than me. I’ve ruined your life. I was so selfish. I love you and I can't be here to comfort you when I'm gone._

_But I hope you're happy, babe, I hope you move on and find someone who makes you as happy as I had planned to. I hope you have a family who loves you. I know you are going to be such an incredible mom one day- your kids are going to be so lucky. I just wish I was the one there to raise them with you. It should be me holding your hand when you need love or holding you when you're sad. It should be me kissing you and making love to you, showing you with actions how much I love you. It should be me bringing you breakfast in bed kissing your forehead with our kids on mothers day and going to parent teacher conferences with you. It should be me going to sleep with you every night and waking up with you every morning watching you slowly go gray and start to wrinkle. But I can't be._

_I can't say goodbye there’s not enough time to say any of that now, so simply, I'm so sorry Delphine for everything_. 

 

Cosima let out a throaty cry, “babe look at me, I love you.”

 

In a heartbeat Delphine ran across the room, she stepped in front of her wife shielding her from Aldous’s gun and pulled her into the tightest embrace she could.

 

In a second, Delphine looked down into her wife's eyes and whispered a lyric from their wedding song, “I will stand by you forever, I love you Cosima,” and kissed her deeply as though it were the last time.

 

 ** _Bang_**.

 


	19. How To Save A Life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My friends, we've reached the end. I may do an epilogue if people want one but as far as the main story goes we're finished. 
> 
> I promise I'll keep this quick because I'm you want to get on and read the ending but I just want to say for a final time thank you, truly thank you so much. The supports I've received has been so overwhelming, I never thought that anyone would read this, let alone actually like it. I've spoken to so many wonderful people who have helped me to form this fic, you have motivated me and given me incredible prompts and on days when I've been feeling down your comments have always made me smile. 
> 
> So, enjoy the last chapter. I hope you all get the ending you were hoping for because I really tried to give you the best one I could. 
> 
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cjVQ36NhbMk 
> 
> Warning: death ensues.

‘ _Now would you die, For the one you loved?’_ _In that second when I was faced with losing her, I knew beyond any doubt that I would. I would die a thousand deaths just to strip the look of terror away from her face, to comfort her I would do anything. I would gladly take the brunt of Aldous’s hatred if it meant that I could hold her one last time and kiss her goodbye._

 

**_Bang_.**

 

It was the single most terrifying and yet the most relieving sound I had ever heard. 

 

Everyone screamed and then I heard it. The loud thud that broke through the shrieks. I turned around still clinging to Cosima as hard as I could, and there he was. Lying on the floor bleeding out. I turned back to Cosima and began examining her for any signs that she was injured or worst shot- thankfully she wasn’t. She did the same to me and cried out in relief when she realised I was safe and pulled me into her arms squeezing me so tight I knew I would be left with bruises.

 

The gunshot- it didn't come from Aldous’s gun. It would appear that Cosima and I have a guardian angel in the form of a nerd named Scott. As soon as he heard what was happening he followed Sarah and I to DYAD, he must have been only 5 minutes or so behind us. Needless to say, he had bought a gun a while back- the day Cosima was attacked to be more precise. He shot Aldous, he saved me, he saved us. And in hindsight, I must admit I can see why he and Sarah were adamant on killing him from the get go- he really was an asshole. 

 

Sarah calmly walked over to Scott and released him of his gun, placing it on the sofa. She held him as he sobbed, only then realising the full extent of what he had just done. 

 

Meanwhile, I felt Cosima’s grip on me loosen. I looked at her confused and when she looked into my eyes I knew what she needed. I nodded and led her over to Aldous. She needed closure, she was the kindest soul I knew and after all he had done to her, to Ali, to Sarah she still couldn't be cruel to a dying man- she had been there herself, at the brink of death, and she knew more than anything that he just needed to find peace. 

 

Cosima knelt down next to him, his breath was slow and laboured, there was no doubt the shot to his chest was fatal even with extensive surgery he wouldn't make it, he would be dead within a minute or two.

 

“Aldous it’s me, I’m here.”

 

“Cosima, Delphine… I-“

 

“-Don't apologise, Aldous, it won't mean anything. I just want you to know that you’re forgiven. Utterly and completely forgiven. You can leave here knowing that as much as I hate you, I don't really hate you at all. You bought me and my wife together, you kept me and my friends- my sisters- alive for over two years. So you can let go, Aldous, stop fighting it and just let go. It will be alright.”

 

And he did. He took one last large inhale and he let go.

 

I admire her so much for that, if it was me, in fact, I think if it had been anyone else other than her, they wouldn't have had the courage to ease her dying tormentor’s pain. But that was Cosima, warm and caring and kind beyond words.

 

She got up from the floor and pulled me over with her to Scott. She comforted Scott, stroking his arms and repeating that fact that it was okay, it was self-defence, that he had saved us all. And it worked well, you could see the acceptance dawn across his face, his violent shakes turned into gentle tremors and then he turned to me. He told me that he saw me in the path of Aldous’s bullet and he didn't think. He reminded me of the day in the hospital when he told me that if it would have been me that had been hurt than Aldous would have paid the same price, and now he had. 

 

Art arrived soon after Aldous had died, he immediately blamed Sarah which of course Sarah took grave offence to and kicked off yet again. However, once we all explained what had happened he was quick to apologise and Sarah hugged him which I think she needed more than she’d ever care to admit. Art defiantly bought the cavalry with him, there were detectives, SWAT officers, paramedics and a coroner, all of them asked if we were okay and if we could recall what happened. Which of course we did, the whole time Cosima and I gripped each other's hand so fiercely fearing that we would be torn apart again. 

 

Finally, after what felt like hours of questioning and health check-ups, Art ordered one of his police officers to drive Cosima and I home. 

 

When we arrived back at our house, as soon as we were in the hallway and the door was closed she hugged me and such force I fell backwards into the coat hanger. 

 

Delphine stroked Cosima’s back and whispered, “it's okay, Cosima. You’re okay.”

 

“I love you. I love you so much I don't know what I would have done-“

 

“-I know, I’m sorry I didn't mean to scare you, I just… I saw you standing there in front of Aldous’s gun and then I don't know. I didn't think I just knew that I had to protect you.”

 

Cosima pulled back and rested her forehead against Delphine’s brushing her cheek with her knuckles, “Delphine, we’re married now, you can't just make those kind of decisions by yourself. This works both ways okay? I’m not ready to be a widow either.”

 

“I know mon amour, I’m sorry. But it's all over now. Truly over, he can't hurt us anymore.”

 

“I can't believe you came after me. When Aldous grabbed me I thought that I’d never see you again.”

 

“Of course I came after you, you’re my wife.”

 

“I know but I didn't know if you would make it in time… part of me hoped that you wouldn't make it at all, I couldn’t bear to see you so upset, I never want to see you like that again."

 

"I know but it was involuntary,  I saw you crying and I couldn't help myself."

 

"I know, you keep saving me Delphine, you keep risking your life for me and you can't do that again okay?”

 

“Tell me you wouldn't have done the same thing, Cosima. Tell me you wouldn't have run in that building after me. Tell me you wouldn't have stepped in front of that gun for me.”

 

Cosima lifted her head to gaze into Delphine's eyes, “Delphine you know I would have.”

 

“Exactly. I would do it again Cosima. There is no part of me that regrets what I did d’accord?”

 

“Well I should hope so, you’re kinda stuck with me now,” Cosima chuckled and flashed Delphine her wedding ring to signify her point. 

 

Delphine wrapped her arms around Cosima’s waist and pulled them so so their bodies were flushed together, “you are incredible do you know that? Even after the night you’ve had, you’re still managing to crack jokes.”

 

“Yeah well, I had a pretty amazing day which compensates for the pretty shitty evening. Plus I… I don't know.”

 

“It's okay tell me, you what?”

 

“I finally feel like the weight of the world is off of my shoulders. I’m not sad he's dead Delphine, I know that makes me sound like a terrible person but I'm not. I forgave him for what he's done, it gave me closure not leaving it the way it was. I think in death he freed not only himself but me too. I don't have to look over my shoulder anymore and wonder what if, I said my piece and now I can leave it all in the past and start my life with you, my wife. We’re quite literally free now. No more Aldous and no more spying, we don't have to worry about anyone other than ourselves from now on.”

 

“Oui, and you’re not a terrible person, you are the bravest, most caring person I have ever met.”

 

“Oh yeah, well you just stood in front of a gun to protect me, so you’re not too bad yourself. You're kinda like a gangsta now.”

 

Delphine chucked, “bon. But if I’m being completely honest Cosima, can we just be boring now? Can we just settle down, have a family and grow old together. Do you think we could leave the break-ups, the sickness, the blackmail, the corporate espionage and the murder attempts in the past, please?”

 

“Ha! You bet. God I’m going to be so boring with you! I’m going to move you into our house as soon as were back from our honeymoon, which we need to leave for in like 10 hours FYI. And then when we’re back we’re going to take up gardening and knitting. You’re going to be the sexy soccer mom and I’m going to be the suburban housewife that cooks for you and our kids every day and is like head of the PTA.” Cosima chuckled and kissed Delphine softly, “But seriously I’m going to try my hardest to give you an incredible life Delphine, I don't want you to be anything less than completely happy every day of our lives together. No more drama, nothing but you and I creating cherished memories from here on in.”

 

“That sounds like bliss, and you don't have to try Cosima, you have no idea how happy you make me just by being you.”

 

“Ditto obvs. Now let’s go to bed, I believe we have a small matter of consummating our marriage to attend to.”

 

“Bien sur! Allons-y!” Delphine slapped Cosima's ass and ushered her towards the stairs.

 

Cosima laughed and pulled Delphine behind her, “okay, okay I’m going.” 

 

Cosima led Delphine to their bedroom and as Delphine fell back onto their bed Cosima straddled her wife’s hips. She cupped her cheeks in her hands and kissed her sweetly whispering, “I love you, Mrs Cormier,” over Delphine's lips. 

 

And Delphine replied with a sentence that she knew she would be saying every day for the rest of her life, “I love you more Mrs Cormier.”


End file.
